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Sometimes I wish I was driven by positive reasons, and not by self-loathing and sense of worthlessness. I didn't have an actual vacation for over 3 years.
I am now in Thailand with my parents, and I am working my ass off to meet IROS/RAL deadline instead of chilling. The urge to continue working is really compulsive. I am very tired.
On a brighter note, the early experiments I ran look promising

Comments
  • 4
    I have a sense of worthlessness, but it does not drive me anywhere 🤔

    Also say "fuck it" to work while you're not at the office (home office included)
  • 3
    @iiii I am "working for myself", in the sense that I will never finish my PhD if I don't put in the time and effort. So if I want to feel like I deserve the oxygen I breathe, I need to do something to "improve" myself.
  • 2
    Your work is amazing and you are among the main reasons for the sense of inadequacy that drives my work.
  • 2
    @NickBones Welcome to Thailand ....hope you have a good time.
  • 1
    @lbfalvy You shouldn't feel inadequate, my work is mostly guess work :)
  • 1
    @NickyBones nevertheless you have to free your head of it sometimes
  • 1
    @NickyBones the real problem is not internalizing that "balance" will actually make you more productive, not less (due to the excessive focus and therefore the inability to have a creative mindset).

    Balance should be viewed not only as in a daily manner, but also weekly, and yearly perspectives.

    So if you decided to take a vacation with your family, be confident in your decision and let you mind wander and body to rest.

    Easier said than done, definitey.

    I was in a very similar situation, as soon as that insight hit, it changed my life. But i still need reminders every now and then.

    I think you are in the correct path, and i wish you much luck!

    Where in Thailand btw? Beaches/Forests?
  • 2
    I think that's the biggest problem with working in academia, you're expected to work in your free time.

    A huge contrast to working in a company. If I go home, I'm at home.

    They don't have my phone number, and I'm not expected to come in during holidays and what not
  • 0
    @LotsOfCaffeine unless its your business or you are a stakeholder or benefiter of the business.
    Then you will find that you will work everyday, most of the time.
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