Client: This works correctly, but I don’t like the code.

Me: What exactly do you not like?

Client: There are barely any lines of code. You need to add more to make it better.

I...I don’t know what to say.

Incredible :-)

But I though e = mc^2 🤔

Errors = more code ^ 2

Just add a bunch of comments. They won't know a thing anyway lol.

@notcool how about:

function add (
a,
b
)
{
return (
a
+
b
);
}

I don't like this rant. Add more lines to it, that will definitely make it better.

Great. Now is your chance to learn how to do bitcoin mining.

Your client is so creative

Beyond belief. Copy and paste a large chunk of Lorem Ipsum, comment it out then send the idiot a bloody big bill

Add a backdoor rest api and charge them money for it.

What kind of client inspects the code? :s

Add some tests or assertions! Or documentation!

From the movie "Amadeus"

EMPEROR: Well, Herr Mozart! A good effort. Decidedly that. An excellent effort! You've shown us something quite new today. 

[Mozart bows frantically: he is over-excited.] 

MOZART: It is new, it is, isn't it, Sire? 

EMPEROR: Yes, indeed. 

MOZART: So then you like it? You really like it, Your Majesty? 

EMPEROR: Of course I do. It's very good. Of course now and then - just now and then - it gets a touch elaborate. 

MOZART: What do you mean, Sire? 

EMPEROR: Well, I mean occasionally it seems to have, how shall one say? [he stops in difficulty; turning to Orsini-Rosenberg] How shall one say, Director? 

ORSINI-ROSENBERG: Too many notes, Your Majesty? 

EMPEROR: Exactly. Very well put. Too many notes. 

MOZART: I don't understand. There are just as many notes, Majesty, as are required. Neither more nor less. 

@freeridet man I love that movie 😆

I recommend the approach of making a very long and complicated " isEven() " function

One ++ one prayer for your poor soul...

If you are using c++ create every line as an inline function

I read it as the client as having a very hard time understanding how the hell they ended up paying so much money for so little code :D

Hahaha

The more the better rite?

#sarcasm

This isn't serious right? Right?

Adding more comments in the code will do the trick 😎

Just throw a copy of Laravel in there and leave it unused. Should be enough code. 😄

Why don't you just tell the client that the code he/she can see is only the top layer, and that underneath all that there's a thousand times more code that actually carries out the programs actions.. And that there's even more code in other disconnected modules that gets executed as a byproduct of the application being run..

That would work, yes?

I really don‘t understand what the purpose of a client reviewing code, who obviously doesn‘t have the slightest idea about coding, is?🤔

All the above suggestions are good. However why don’t you tell the client to fuck off?

Exactly. Very well put. Tell the client to fuck off.