So today I realized that Im not happy.

When I was a kid I wanted to do many things because I had time and energy but I had no money. Now that Im an adult and I have the money, I have no energy and no will power to try and have personal life in these few hours left of my day. I spend 9 hours at work everyday and totally 1hr 30min is wasted on commuting.

I spent 4 years in uni between lectures and working on my side projects, and I really believed that after uni I will get a job and my life work balance will improve.

After uni I spent 2 years working abroad in 3 jobs at 3 countries. I work as android dev and now Im making a really decent salary.

However Im not happy at all. I realized that life is not about the money. Im changing countries like socks and dont even feel the need to socialize or enjoy my life anymore. Im european and these other eu countries are not that different at all. It came to a point where relationships are meaningless to me. I became an office drone who cares only about work and outside of work I care only about my projects and more work.

At this point im only 25 years old with around 2 years of experience and money is really good, but fuck it Im so tired of being an emigrant and having no stability in life. Im so drained. I spent past 6 years (4 in uni combined with side projects and 2 years working in 3 jobs in different countriee) working my ass off and lying to myself that after the next big thing Im gonna take a break and enjoy life. But its never enough. I dont want to hit 30s or 40s and realize that I wasted my life on pursuing money and didnt get to enjoy life..

Im really considering taking a 6-12 months vacation. I need to find myself. Probably going back to my own country. Just learn how to enjoy life, attend workshops, get to know new city area, meet new people, do some interesting hobbies. Maybe do a little freelance (max 10hrs a week).

Im tired of feeling like I need to make as much money as I can and learn as much about my work as I can. Its not rewarding because its never enough.

Whats the point in that money if I cant enjoy it?

  • 7
    There's a time you realize that money isn't all that, you should be able to live not just survive..

    You're young, take care of your mental health.. Everyone has its own time...but don't forget that is not about the money (yes, it is important), but it's about enjoyng life despite the little daily hiccups.

    Take care!
  • 2
    That's like my life, I'd have done exactly the same post. I work 9 hours a day + commutes, but there are colleagues of mine that work 12 hours a day or more, Saturday and Sunday included. I also heard a manager saying "I had a new child few days ago and I didn't notice it, I still didn't see her", and that was the moment I understood there's something wrong. Maybe we should risk and create a new start-up, idk
  • 4
    Great reflection. It's sad the world impose things like that to people. When someone study a lot and work hard, they lose precious time and energy for personal life. I went through a crisis like that about 3 years ago, and I noticed how neglecting other parts of my life was making me feel terrible.

    Then I started a "recovering" plan. It helped me immensely - I made new friends, took some time to experiment new things and relax, and met my boyfriend at that time. I didn't stopped to work, but definitely worked less. However, I'm a freelancer, and that made things a little bit easier.

    Your idea of taking a break is good, if that helps you find time and energy to try the things you want and need.

    I'm trying to do the same for the next months, since this year life was specially hash and I feel I need to balance things out again.

    Find yourself, find your balance. We all deserve that. We are not machines.
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