Build times of about 3+ minutes, perfect time to browse this app!

people say, in php you dont have that excuse, they really havent deployed a magento 2 changem have they ?

A few years back when we used McAfee antivirus, it would randomly spike our dev machines to 100% cpu and take up nearly all available memory. When we complained, the boss would lecture us on how important anti-virus was...blah blah..and we would not change the antivirus policy. After another lecture about productivity (boss was concerned about missed deadlines) I modified the image and replaced "My Code's Compiling" with "McAfee!" and sent it around the office. Everyone thought it was funny..except the boss (which he only knew because the office teacher's pet ratted me out). That 'mistake' as he called it got me another lecture on insubordination.
Good thing he never knew I uninstalled McAfee the first time it spiked my CPU.

I need to write more Selenium tests. My current 30 only take about 4:30 to run. Other 110 code tests take <100ms total. :-(