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Rant against a new religion: the Agile Religion, started by the Agile Manifesto: https://agilemanifesto.org

This manifesto is as ambiguous and open to interpretation as any religious text. You might as well get advice from a psychic. If you succeed, you'll start believing in them more. If you don't, then they'll say you misinterpreted them. The whole manifesto just re-states the obvious with grandiloquent words.

For example: "Deliver working software frequently, from a couple of weeks to a couple of months, with a preference to the shorter timescale." What does this say REALLY? To me, it just says "deliver software, try to be fast." Great, thanks for re-writing my job description. Of course, some features take "a couple of weeks", while others "a couple of months". Again, thanks for re-stating the obvious.

"Value *working software* over _comprehensive documentation_"
Result => PHP

"Welcome changing requirements, even late in development."
I'm okay with this one as long as the managers also `welcome the devs changing deadlines, even the night before the release date`. We're not slaves; we're more like architects. If you change the plans for the building, we're gonna have to demolish part of what we've already built and re-construct. I'm not gonna spring just because you change your mind like a girl changes clothes.

"Business people and developers must work together daily throughout the project."
Daily? Fine. ONCE a day, sure. But this doesn't give you the right to breathe down my neck or break my concentration by calling me every couple of mintues.

"The most efficient and effective method of conveying information to and within a development team is face-to-face conversation."
- Not if you could've summed up that meeting in an email.
- Whereas that might be true for clarity, write that down.

"Working software is the primary measure of progress."
... is how you get a tech debt the size of the US's.

"The sponsors, developers, and users should be able to maintain a constant pace indefinitely."
Have you heard of vacations?

"Continuous attention to technical excellence and good design enhances agility."
So you're telling us "do good". Again, thank you for re-writing my job description.

It's just a bunch of fancy babble, more suitable in poetry than in the dev world. It doesn't provide any scientific evidence for any of its supposed suggestions, so I just won't use it

Comments
  • 6
    If you're vague enough, you can't be held responsible for anything.
  • 3
    It does make sense if you compare that to pure waterfall development - which is why nobody does that.

    Even where waterfall is mandatory (some regulated domains), you break the whole thing down into milestones instead of planning for two years and then developing for another two years, only to find out that it won't really work.

    Or you deliver non-certified test software for trying out what works and modify the requirements accordingly.

    Sounds somewhat agile? Yeah, that's why.
  • 0
    Agile is exactly like religion, the only ones benefiting are the preachers.
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