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Story Time.

TL;DR - Because of Corporate PTSD, I replace the word "everyone/folks/guys" with "Team" when I'm addressing my colleagues, whether it be an e-mail or verbally (F2F/Zoom/GMeet).

In 2019, An office job I worked at, a new Vice President joined the company (the same one who told me he saw me in his dream).

We were required, on a daily basis, to form a circle and one-by-one everyone would out-loud say their yesterday's and current day's tasks updates.

So before the VP joined, everyone was free to initiate their turn however they wanted. Phrases like "Hey Everyone", "Good morning all" or "Hi All" was all around acceptable.

But the moment he started joining the stand-ups, he felt the need to change this phrase to a standard "Good morning Team". No other variations of this. Only and ONLY these three words.

Why you ask? Because saying Good morning is good manners and using the word "Team" strengthens the bond between co-workers and increases collaboration and creativity.

Some colleagues were bound to forget this and they did, which resulted in the VP blasting at everyone for doing so. He would show genuine rage over this, almost as if the company would go out of business because of us, not complying to do so.

Now imagine, you get up at 8 AM, get ready, commute, and get ready to speak for the standup and you get yelled at in front of everyone, FIRST THING before you start working.

Needless to say, it would kill everyone's spirit for getting their day started but nobody could speak up against him because obviously, he was the VP of the company then.

And oh yes, our CEO fired him 5 months after that because he (the VP) got slammed with a pedophilia-related lawsuit, by the parents of a 5-year old.

Comments
  • 11
    Hehe, a pedo dreamed about you
  • 8
    @retoor Laugh all you want, but I'd prefer him dreaming about me over him sexually assaulting a 5-year old.
  • 3
    Woooow I want whatever that VP is on!

    Not to consume, but to ban to prevent any further harm to innocent devs and kids!

    What a weird experience OP
  • 3
    Good morning dipshits lmao
  • 3
    Sounds horribly like a corporate culture.
  • 0
    Our corporate culture at one company I was at was to “bend the knee”, literally, when late for any meeting and to beg forgiveness. I was lucky enough not to have this enforced a couple of times I was late. But I was already prepared to push back and possibly be fired. I bend the knee to no human being on earth (there are plenty of historical examples of what goes wrong when people bow to other people). There is only One (☝️ ) to Whom I will bend the knee.
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