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A coworker asked for a raise. The answer was yes IF he did something about his teeth.. It didn't look nice but wtf
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Part 1:
Many years ago, 'Andy' (in his early 20s) would post drunk pics/videos to his facebook (nothing too crazy or anything) and our 'moral police' (consisted of our dept manager and an area mgr) thought it could reflect negatively against the company. So they asked him to remove the content and no longer post lewd or any content that would embarrass the company. That lasted about a week. Andy posted a video with him drinking a beer saying "Fuck you John, Fuck you James".
Because the company didn't have a specific social media policy about employee conduct, they couldn't fire him. -
Part2:
For the next couple of months, Andy found himself 'failing' code reviews. Not sorting the 'using' statements, having blank lines in between closing '}' c# statement/blocks, etc. Picky/petty stuff
Not long, Andy found himself on the dreaded 'Employee Improvement Plan' (pronounced E pip). He had 30 days to improve or he would be let go.
Items he had to improve: Improve his code quality. Improve application performance. Become a better team player.
That's it. Nothing to define what 'improve' actually meant. Of course when Andy tried to find out, he was told "Don't worry, it'll be fine, do you best", etc..etc.
Around day 25, they fired him for failing the E-pip
Pouring sprinkles on the icing, on the cake, the dept and area mgr pushed the firing onto HR to do. They were both on a training trip. When Andy tried to find out exactly what in the E-pip he failed, the poor HR rep had no idea. All the paperwork he had was that Andy failed to meet the objectives of the E-pip -
@retoor > "that's amazing"
At that time 'Andy' didn't do much to help himself. He once left a meeting after getting a call in the meeting (ex. Saying "Oh no! I'll be right there!<hangs up>, this is bad...I'll be right back!")
Thinking something bad just happened, when Andy comes back about 10 minutes later, they asked if everything was alright.
A: "Yea, my dad and I are playing Eve Online and another faction broke in and was stealing our loot. His computer locked up I had to log in and stop the bleeding"
You can imagine that didn't reflect well on Andy with the 'powers that be' -
scor33101yThat E pip usage sounds like hell out of a managers textbook.
Wow FML would I not want to work for that employer and that "supportive" HR.
A 20 yo bloke, not allowed to act his age but expected to cut all his social.
And yea, that guy's got an alcohol problem and likely a couple more.
Given, quite stupid social, but nevertheless.
Are you still in there @PaperTrail? -
@scor > "Are you still in there"
Yes. *A lot* has changed since those days. I've ranted a lot about the previous administration.
Our current mgmt team are mostly other devs who aren't looking to score political points. 'Get your job done, make users happy, and go home' is the current edict.
The VP and I have a looooong history, which I know I won't be moving into mgmt until after he retires and no one remembers why the VP always skips over me when they need to move folks up the ladder. -
@PaperTrail I left social media (twitter, facebook, and now recently linkedin) because it is a liability. Nothing good can come from sharing your home life with random people. Fuck faces can and will use it against you.
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I would do a two snap + clap motion and then ask one of my guys if he wanted mint gum.
I did it for almost 3weeks if not more, his answer was always yes.
Then one day I did the motion and did not offer the gum. He waddled his way into my office to ask if I had gum because he felt this horrible breath smell coming from him.
Das right, I Pavlove'd one of my guys.
And I will fking do it again.
BTW: I took the idea from an episode from the office. It was funny how it did work. -
@Demolishun > "I left social media because it is a liability."
I only have a twitter account to follow some tech people. I never post anything and I have no identifiable data that a pointy-hair-boss could find me.
After the 'Andy' incident(s), the dept mgr 'John' began monitoring anyone he could (and having his minions do the same) to see what kind of dirt he could dig up.
I found out when one of his minions asked me if I was on any of the socials.
J: "PaperTrail, you on <list of socials>?"
Me: "Just twitter. Why?"
J: "John couldn't find you and was asking around for your profile info. He's wanting to monitor all of our media posts looking for anything we might say negative about him or the company."
Me: "What a d-bag. No, he'll never find me out there"
J: "What is your twitter handle?"
Me: "Nice try and no"
What are some of the ways you have seen people target and manipulate coworkers maliciously?
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