4
kiki
191d

“Those stitches under my belly hurt, for sure, but what if I… hypothetically, just took manicure scissors, and… was urgently rushed back to hospital for no reason in particular, so to speak?”, — echoed in my head. I was 15. Just out of hospital after hernia surgery, knowing full well they will give me morphine again if I did that.

Yes, they used morphine on a 15-year-old kid. It was a town of 50k people in rural Russia.

Withdrawal syndrome lasted about two weeks that felt like two years. You can't tell if you're asleep or not, you shiver while you constantly think about nothing but morphine, and you're anxious because your grandparents shouldn't know! As if it was ever a 15-year-old kid's fault.

Yes, I, in a way, quit morphine at the age of 15.

The hernia was caused by what my mother did to me, but that's the story for another day.

Comments
  • 3
    Compared to that, nicotine withdrawal was a barely noticeable funny tingling somewhere in my heart area. What a joke
  • 2
    Dude you are like an old bear with a scar over one eye, you have seen and survived some pretty horrible shit!
  • 1
    While i don't have the psychological components of addiction... to any substance (i tried to be a nicotine smoker but i was just too lazy), and am allergic to morphine, i know what you mean.

    Im gonna be 32 in a week and I was put on A LOT of drugs since i was 13. 24/7-- Norco(vicodin) or percocet and soma at the start. For a few years i was even on the aforementioned along with Butrans (basically stadol(more opiates) in patch form) and klonopin. I wound up in the ER several times cuz i figured id just stop them and deal with the pain... before age 16 i realised that was very counterproductive, just wasted at least a day of my life and whoever had to get me there... to result in more drugs than i was supposed to take, via IV.

    A yr and a half ago i finally dropped the opiates due to ketamine, marijuana when necessary and occasional shrooms for inflammation (wish id have known their effect earlier).

    The physical symptoms are shit even w/o the psych ones and at ideal titration rate off.
  • 1
    I should probably mention... it wasn't shitty doctors that were prescribing me that stuff. My condition fully warrants it. My mother (not super fond of) is anesthesia (crna) so even if i didn't research everything down to the molecular structures, i certainly wasnt in an under-informed position. My drs are currently split on if im insanely detrimentally stubborn or doing the right/logical and healthy thing... currently i saw a dentist and they appear to be on the side of the former... i *may* have seriously chipped/cracked a tooth or 2 due to my sleep coping method for dealing with pain, intense teeth grinding/jaw clenching.
  • 0
    A yr and a half ago i finally dropped the opiates due to ketamine, marijuana when necessary and occasional shrooms for inflammation Connections Unlimited .The physical symptoms are shit even w/o the psych ones and at ideal titration rate off.
  • 0
    This bot output has me curious as to the intent and wtf is with the code output for parentheses...
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