About🏳️⚧️ CSS god. Apple femboy. Bipolar type I. Autistic. Tabs are better than spaces
SkillsCSS is all you need really
Joined devRant on 2/19/2018
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There is an alternative universe where L.E.S. Artistes by Santigold is more popular than Paper Planes by M.I.A.7
Your code should be the gold in Kintsugi. Filling the gaps between solid chunks of porcelain, no more and no less. Porcelain shards are UI elements, databases, and other solid objects, and your code is the gold in between.
It should flow organically, like a vine growing through the bricks.
When the solid shards are way too far away from each other, and just gold is too fragile, rely on a backbone, like a data structure. An oriented graph is a perfect backbone for, say, a stepped form that diverges. From that backbone, grow your golden vines to reach out and connect what remains to be connected. Learn data structures. They are very flexible, very powerful.
Angular, on the other hand, is like a huge, rigid nonsense made of oxidized steel. It cannot bend to hold other pieces gently. Everything should be cut square and secured with bolts and rivets. It is only fine for you falling on it, hitting your temple against its sharp corner. An inflexible abomination that rots under the rain. It is dead.
Your architecture should be alive.
As of today, I restrict my boilerplate to just closures. Anything more than that I find unnecessary. Any idiot can build a bridge that works, but it takes talent to build a bridge that barely works.
This art took me six years to master, and, like a black belt, it's just the beginning of a lifelong journey. I'm so serene right now.6
advantages of bionic systems:
- energy efficiency
- low friction
- compact size
- water resistance
advantages of mechanical systems:
- rotation is available
- can change parts6
I had a nightmare where I was in my bed, unable to move, and my stepdad was touching my body and smiling creepily13
PEZ is the best thing in the world ever
PEZ is the best
PEZ is my favourite
PEZ is even better than thick thighs
they save lives, they will be my demise19
You work on a huge factory. You’re ready to upload the new AI prototype to the mainframe. Upload finished, and the light goes off.
Light turns on. All speakers in the building:
🎵This was a triumph
🎵I’m writing a note here: huge success6
What is that DISGUSTING trend of describing celebrity couples by combining their names? Kim + Kanye = fucking KIMYE? Elon Musk + Grimes = fucking GRUSK? WHAT IS THAT HOOOW AND WHYYY THIS IS SOOO annoying!
Lemme try. Depp + Heard = Hepp? Deard? Jomber? Amnny? What are those?
This should be illegal. Ffs, I'm out9
I tried LSD yesterday!
Backstory: I have a weird combo of bipolar type 1 and autism. During the day, my brain works inconsistently. Here how my day usually goes:
09:00. I wake up. Uninterested, cold, masculine. No thoughts in the background. No OCD.
12:00. Brain warms up. Thought process begins. Thoughts are short in their length
14:00. Thoughts start to get longer. Stress starts to accumulate. Background thoughts start, now typically 2–3 at a time.
16:00. Twitching begins. Thought chains are now 5–6 concepts long, one following the other. Perception level rises quickly. I start to feel more feminine. It is in this state that I start to spot imperfections and mistakes looking at code or text without reading it. I see it like a painting, and mistakes appear as “visually wrong” parts. This does not depend on formatting.
17:00. OCD becomes more severe. I HAVE to touch all the surfaces around me, evenly, as if my hands were text highlighters, and I had to paint everything evenly, without overlaps or spots that are brighter or darker than the others. Some surface textures become irritating, and feel quite unpleasant to the touch. If I go for a run now, like 3 km or so, I feel somewhat relieved.
18:00. Things are getting serious. Creativity levels through the roof. I speak in long, never-ending, profound sentences. Background and foreground thoughts almost become one. I appear visually drunk and happy, despite never drinking alcohol. Femininity rises even further. Sometimes, when I speak to a small group of people, especially if I go with friends to meet new people, and we go to some bar, new people ask to record my voice or to write down whatever I’m saying. To be honest, this reason alone is a huge boost to how I see yourself.
19:00. OCD is crazy now. Surfaces have soul.
21:00 <— Gotta take my meds and go to sleep here to prevent what comes at 22:00
22:00. All thoughts, both foreground and background, fully became one. Now my brain officially disobeys me and thinks on its own, and I can ride it like a surfer at best. Twitching becomes concerning. I develop a 1000-yard stare. I am officially a female. Physical strength is somewhat enhanced. Pain tolerance lowered significantly.
23:00. Derealization begins. The world around me appears two-dimensional and flat, like a picture. It is hard to get home on foot, even in close (less than one km) proximity. Brain is fully numb. All that thought monstrosity that was building up is just noise now. Zero “flops” available to think about something I want to think about, like how much money I have on me or what time it is.
I go to sleep. I see nightmares. I wake up, and the cycle repeats.
Contrary to a popular opinion, I never take any “brain-boosting” meds like antidepressants, and I think now you can see why. I consume neither alcohol nor caffeine. Neither me, nor my doctors want my brain to explode. I only take lamotrigine that helps to “lower down” mania, and quetiapine, a neuroleptic, that slows down my brain, like a neuroleptic. Both are there to slow down my brain, to kinda “throttle” my brain like a CPU to cool it down.
That said, 100ug of LSD just… brought me my usual 18:00 state, but in the morning?
All that small-dose recreational ordeal? The thing that helps people feel more energetic and creative?
People pay money… for that? To feel the way I feel every evening?9
Unit tests are like the second half of a watermelon. It exists, yet no one needs it.
You only need it if you're a misanthrope who wasn't invited when everyone else ate the first half.5
devRant logo in the web version main page is cropped just a bit at the right edge.
Have a nice day!17
Death is when you cannot tell yourself apart from everything else. Thus, the concept of “you” is cut away by Occam's razor.
That's it, there is nothing more to it. The biological aspect doesn't matter, as it's fundamentally unknowable according to Heidegger.
That said, DMT is probably a good way to experience death. After all, it is linked directly to production of a specific chemical inside your brain that is only present during birth and death. I never tried any drug whatsoever, and I think DMT is a very good first thing to try.
If you want to know more, google “ego death”. I'm not the first to think of what I say.11
I am honestly flattered by the fact that @scor really, unironically thinks that “by the frequency and varsity and depth you post and comment and self imaging”, I can't be a single person, and there is a whole TEAM behind me!
Honestly, I don't care about insults. Neither yours, nor of that schmuck that is salty because he posted some stupid misogynic shit a while ago, I reposted it as a screenshot, and he was obliterated by the community.
I'm only posting this because people out there legitimately think I'm a hive mind. It's not every day that you're told whatever you do cannot be done by one person. To me, this is more of a compliment.
Looking past devRant, I would like to meet @scor and other haters IRL. I have no hard feelings. I'm just an autistic person with bipolar disorder. I post whatever I want, as it's somewhat therapeutic.
You don't have to acknowledge it, but here's an honest, personal message: if you at any point compare yourself to me and lose, remember, my personality and creativity is a negligent, slight payoff for a literal hell that is a mental disorder. My thoughts are thinking themselves. I can't control them. My body is twitching constantly. I'm both actively anxious and always tired. My intellect suffers a massive penalty in a depressive phase, like now.
Finding at least some positive side to that hellscape is absolutely vital, and any person with a disorder can tell you that.
The fact that I'm social, I have friends and a job is a miracle. I'm privileged. I've seen a lot of people less lucky than me. They weren't able to monetize their troubled, sharp brain. I was.20
Depression is not a passive sorrow and lack of energy. My depression, being bipolar type I, is active, furious, burning pain within. My heart is pounding, and it hurts. The strong, blunt guilt for nothing I did in particular, and then the anxiety that is all around and over my view, reminiscent of how mould grows on a slice of bread.
It never stops.