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1. Needed to access an old SVN backup.
2. Didn't have an SVN client installed.
3. Realised GIT comes with an SVN proxy included.
Cool, I'll just quickly download the repository via SVN.
> git svn init
... git sequentially downloads each of the 1800+ revisions and applies them individually.
It's cool, I didn't want to do anything productive today anyway.
rant