Hi Dev Ranter,

My name is John Smith and I came accross to your resume on Linked In and I was very impressed. Would you be interested in a 5 min call?

Job Details:
Required skills (all expert levels): C#, JAVA, Clojure, C, PHP, Frontend, Backend, Agile, MVP, Baking, Redis, Apache, IIS, RoR, Angular, React, Vue, MySQL, MSSIS, MSSQL, ORACLE, PostgreSQL, Access, Python, Machine Learning, HTML, CSS, Fortran, C++, Game design, Book writing, PCI - Compliance
Salary: $15/Hours no benefits
Duration: 2 Months (possible extension, plus we can fire you at will)
Place: Remote (with work tracking software)
Hours: 5am - 1pm, 6pm - 11pm
Expect to work on weekends

You will be managing people as well as building applications that had to be running as of yesterday. Team culture is very toxic and no one cares about you.

We care about you though (as long as you deliver)

Looking forward to talk to you.

John Smith
Founder, CEO, Director of Staffing, Entrepeneur
Tech Staffers LLC ( link to a PNG posted on facebook)
Est. 2020

  • 18
    I fear those job listings are effective like Nigerian Emails are.

    Folks who know better won't touch that, and folks who will take a beating will apply and just take the beating.
  • 16
    Good thing is outlook and gmail has draw tool now so i just draw a middle figure as a reply
  • 7
    You had me until I read work tracking software. I don't really want to share my porn with the office.
  • 2
    @ars1 don't knock it unless you've tried it ;)
  • 3
    At least here, those kinds of emails are fishing for you to reply with a no. They use this as a checked box on the form to justify an H1-B for whatever the actual work is.

    Sending recruiters to linkedin jail is a mitzvah.
  • 4
    Fake, you can't post png's on Facebook without them converting it to a lossy format.
  • 2
    @Wicho damn, this gets to the point now doesn't it?
  • 2
    @SortOfTested Could you extend on that? Cause I'm always the nice guys saying no kindly and wishing them luck on their quest.
  • 2
    @N00bPancakes I am really hoping it down't come to that for me.
  • 5
    In the US, regulations state in order to hire a visa worker, you must have made a good faith effort to find local candidates. Legal precedent has determined that you can satisfy this by obtain evidence of consistent disinterest from local candidates, and that no applying candidates fully qualify.

    They use this tactic of dropping bullshit job ads to get someone to write back, "thank you, but I'm not interested" and use that as documentation for justifying the cheaper outsourced hire they can bill at the same rate, but pay substantially less.

    Even if you accept an interview, they can still disqualify you if you lack a single exact criteria, if you are over-skilled, or based on an interviewer's opinion that your resume is inaccurate.
  • 2
    @SortOfTested Awesome, I'm gonna stop doing that then.

    Thank you!
  • 3
    If it's not solicited and they haven't messaged you before sending the invite:

    - click ignore
    - I don't know this person

    If they get 3 of those in a week, linkedin will ban their account for 14 days.
  • 1
    All of the other things are more or less fine by me, stop acting like job postings are not wishlists
  • 3
    Baking? You bet I can bake. I baked myself a gnarly ass cake yesterday.
  • 2
    Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
  • 0
    @hardfault "uh y u send crude drawing of pen is?"
  • 3
    @yellow-dog they are total wish lists!!!! I saw an ad just yesterday looking for UX dev that has at least a masters or PhD in computer science & at LEAST 5 years experience.

  • 2
    @yellow-dog but then I saw that 28 senior devs had applied to the job and a few junior devs as well.

    And that’s when I closed the tab
  • 2
    Yet another "we want an H1-B/OPT" posting. Filters out most americans because we couldn't afford a masters in most cases :(
  • 1
    And that's why we put anything we've ever touched at all on the CV
Add Comment