I am so ANXIOUS!! CAN'T WORK AT ALL!! SOMEONE SAVE ME PLEASE!!

Walk, run, push ups.

What @Demolishun said. Physical activity helps when feeling down and anxious

@Demolishun it's 11:30 PM here. I can't work, like never. I procrastinate, and when things come close I get anxious. In both cases can't work. I am such a dumb person. I don't even know how to live life. I have no one. No one I can talk with about these issues. I feel like crying. Crying a lot. Maybe that will do my work. I am jist dumb and deserve nothing in my life. I have a good pay, they'll fire me. I hate myself so much.
4 days long weekend and I don't want to attend work tomorrow. I hate myself. I hate everything. I hate myself.

@d-fanelli I walked, I watched something with my family, I still feel so scared.

I can literally see myself growing up to have a bad life. I don't have any control over it. I am single, no relationships this year. Career is not looking good. I am not able to achieve anything in my life. I am so bad at problem solving. I make so bad decisions. I hate myself. I lost my close friends and have no one to talk about these problems. I can't do anything. I am not able to deliver at my work. I am missing foundational skills at least I don't see anything good happening soon.

@true-dev001 under so many factors, we tend to overinflate the trouble. In any bad situation: do what you <3 and it will pay off, it isn't a bad decision per se.

sudo apt purge anxiety anxiety3 mental-health+ calm+

Seek professional help, start with your doctor who can refer you to a professional. You can get through this. Don’t struggle alone, the first step is seeking help.

I procrastinate, I hate on myself, I do all these things. Part of it is learning that nothing is permanent, nothing. You are visiting and will go home one day. You do not know when that is. So make the most of each and every moment.

Socialize, exercise, find meaning in your work and play. Make work and play be a service to others. "I am helping my customer solve this <problem>." "I am helping my family (which I don't always like) move some furniture this weekend."

If you are really really down then find someone you can talk to. You are never really alone in this world, but it sure feels like it sometimes.

Mate, ++ for support not because I think you're correct!

Take a deep breath, get some rest if you're able, and try to focus on *one* thing. One thing only. What have you got to do as a prerequisite to your task at work for instance? Download a repo? Write a stub for a test? Check comments on a PR and make some notes on what to do?

Then do that. Don't focus on anything else. Stuck? Then make a note of what you're stuck on, the things you've tried, and then take that to standup in the morning and ask for help. There's never shame in asking for help.

If you need to rant or vent, we're here. 👍

@AlmondSauce I always like your comments. I hope I can return your favor.
For the anxiety, I am feeling much better now. I did the minimal required for the stand up but will be on a leave as the day tomorrow is full of unproductive meetings. I will work with my colleague.
I still feel like I am not a good developer but for now dealing with my anxiety is more important when I think that I am close to figuring it out.
I love the devRant community.
Thanks everyone here, if I could make a software to transfer feelings I would have transferred the joy I'm feeling now to all of you. Feels so better to see these nice comments.

There’s very little I can add above what everyone has said - I can say that I believe that the mental benefits of exercise are 100% essential to surviving an IT career. I can get down on myself too (as we all do), but instead of feeling sad, I get angry (still get the anxiety though). I take it out at the gym - gotta be careful these days of course with Covid. My friends that are in jobs that literally deal with life and death situations are always amazed at my seeming non-stop stress. Something about IT work just tends to consume your life and long term chronic stress is part of it. Gotta find a good coping mechanism - for me it’s exercise and being outside or I lose my mind.

@true-dev001 Very glad that you're feeling much better. Don't focus on being a "good" dev - that's subjective anyway - just focus on whatever is in front of you, push yourself where you can, and I'm sure whatever you're after will come!

If you openly and honestly try your hardest but ask for help when you're stuck, then it's only going to be arses who judge you.

@AtuM good advice, thank you!

@vigidis Yeah, that's something I realised today. I didn't go to. work today because of a lot meetings and trying to be productive. I took the tiniest task and tried ro implement each. Till now it's working great. No anxiety.
Thanks for this advice :)

@Nanos I don't have a hobby right now. I read some self help books, I try to play songs whenever necessary. Yeah but no hobby. I am. thinking of buying a keyboard. :)

@Nanos ooh this is a great advice actually. Before covid I used to play TT and loved it. I usually was playing for hours to get good. Now I don't have a game. Yeah I can try this :)

@Nanos yeah, I have some trusted people who can advice but lately I think I just started feeling that I am being a burden on them. I am only asking and not able to help.

@Nanos What I am lacking is clarity. I am working with my senior so he knows each detail of the problem. It creates a lots of homework for me if I want to start working on my part as I have to ask him each detail and it is expected that I'll forget something to ask which creates uncertainty.

@Nanos DevRant actually has given me better advices than my friends.:)

@AtuM I love what I am supposed to do. Coding, finding solutions (Although I am not good at it) I hate the meetings the constant need of defining and structuring everything, the constant need to answer the deadlines. I jave taken leave today because of a lot meetings and loving that I am feeling no pressure and being more productive.

@fiftyhz Yeah, I totally agree on this. I think I should find a hobby. I wanted to buy a keyboard for so long. I think this is the time.:)

@AlmondSauce I totally agree with you.:) Thanks for saying that being a good dev is subjective. I have been in constant struggle of being and doing the right things. I recently realised that I have doing this and that, nothing is black and white. I have grinded myself on not being able to say the right things to other people when let's say they are sad or upset. Then something I read and it just said that it's not black and white, for someone you can be a good person, for someone you will be the worst. It all is a person's perspective. Realising that has made me look at things differently and do the thing that I suppose is right and not afraid of judgements.
Thanks a lot!! :)

@AtuM Great advice :)

And yes, even if it's not all IT, it's always good to have diversity.