Not only do I write software, but now I help the managers view and understand our analytics, just like in kindergarten.

Now I'm forced to help them essentially fake data so investors are satisfied 🤡🔫

"Delete metrics X, Y, and Z for now, we don't want anyone to see them!"

"Change the label of this metric to 'unique user' views! (not total!)"

"Set all charts to cumulative so it looks like they are all up and to the right!"

Sigh.

This isn't what I signed up for.

You were in one weird kindergarten

May as well just point to a mock data file where all the numbers are strong

That's how it is in the high level management.

The data is real, but how it's presented that can result in different interpretations.

I worked assisting my senior manager in my previous job (non tech). She asked me to do a lot of tricks so that our performance charts looked good (or at least not as bad as they looked).

That's why I never truly trust all the fancy graphs I encounter anymore.

So you basically are the Wally in your company?

Never trust statistics you haven't faked yourself.

@IntrusionCM Never trust management, either.

@Root never trust anyone at work.

Devs are worse liers, which makes it easier to detect their lies...

Management are fucking psychopaths, lie detection is impossibro

@IntrusionCM That’s my secret, cap. I always believe they’re lying.

@Root ah.

Plus "That's my secret - I'm always angry."

I'll happily learn about analytics. How to do it. I have a worldview and a framework when it comes to development, but I have none about analytics. It's a huge dark area for me. The best I can do is to do stuff with people's IP addresses, or to insert an image into an email that if you open it and don't have automatic content loading disabled, I'll see the request made from your email app to the image server.

reminds me of a burndown chart that we had on a very prominent jira board... it showed created vs. done bugs.
after staring at it for a longer time (for API related reasons), at some point i realized that "open" and "done" were shown on two different Y scales, and "done" was actually only a third of the amount it *appeared* to be, relatively to open bugs. but you really had to look at it attentively to notice it at all.
so the data looked really good, except it wasn't.

i asked a few people if they didn't think this kind of representation is a problem, including the one who had created this chart, but nobody considered it a problem. 😂

You must be working for my old boss. Ah the memories…

Changing total views to unique is fraud. Just FYI, you know, if you end up in jail and are wondering how you got there.

@hardCoding "fraud"? fraud to whom? it's not like we're a publicly traded company

it's just kids in the sandbox, that's all

@fullstackclown investors

It's still is fraud. Omitting data can be done but mislabeling is the same as fake data.
You can refuse to do it by the way. They can fake their own data so they can never pin it on you.
If you do do these things make sure there is a paper trail.

Fine by me as long as the changes are done with his/her credentials :D