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This is a cautionary tale. I walked in thinking “job stress is a form of temporary discomfort.” I never considered that it could cause permanent damage. I am really self initiated so it was easy to pick up more and have quick wins at first.
I am in a much better work situation now. I still have some major wounds and emotional triggers. I still get fever dreams about that job and my mood can suddenly turn if something pokes an old wound.
Almost a year and a half. I was so overworked and my failures were so impactful. I would go home and obsess over work all evening and have fever dreams on nights that I could sleep. It was so mentally painful that I was going to jump off a building after a few drinks to make it stop. A military turned civilian doctor told me that I showed symptoms like soldiers in prolonged conflict. He told me “quit or it will kill you” without even knowing about the suicide stuff. So I quit the job and to this day still suffer flashbacks and have crazy mood swings.
Burnout is real. Dangerous stress is real.
rant
wk316