The company I work for (very big IT consultancy) has made the absolutely genius decision to put a block on the corporate proxy for GitHub. GITHUB. Because no fucking software developer ever needs to visit there. Their reason? "We don't want people publishing our intellectual property". Mate, I can fucking guarantee you that if unscrupulous bastards want to publish code against our T&C's, they will do so. Why make every body else's job harder and block it?!

But the best bit, you can submit a request (that is accepted without question) to get yourself an exemption. WHY THE FUCKING FUCK HAVE THE BLOCK IN THE FIRST PLACE THEN

To add to their fucktardery, they blocked the CDN that hosted stackoverflows css and JavaScript last year (CloudFlare) weeks after the alleged hack was fixed, and seemingly without any research at all. This obviously rendered stackoverflow unusable. Because again, why would a company full of engineers need to go there.

Morons.

2 weeks into my industrial placement year during University I was tasked with writing a rhel .rpm file to install our software.

Within this script contained rm -rf ... you can see where this is going, right?

Well this command was meant to delete a local usr/bin folder during the cleanup, and it did! But I must have accidentally changed something, and instead of staying local, it bounced to /. Goodbye usr/bin. Goodbye 2 weeks worth of progress. Hello angry infrastructure team...

My first gig straight out of uni was on a project where my role required fixing an FTP client to upload files from a clients machine to our server. It was a spreadsheet. VBA. An excel spreadsheet. FTP client. A spreadsheet.

Me: "why are we using VBA for this?"
PM (was a dev 10+ years ago and started the basics of this 'ftp client'): "VBA is great." *Stern face*

Brilliant

What end users seem like

All too often.

I'm a graduate developer with 1 year experience. Was asked to improve the performance of a feature which was written by external consultants on £1000 per day, and in its worst case takes 2 hours to complete. I rewrote it and got it down to 1 minute 27 seconds.

Manager: "Well yeah, but can you not get it any faster?"

...