What I need is an automatic banner that pops up at the top of the screen, saying:
YOU'RE ON THE WRONG BRANCH YOU RETARD
In big red letters.
No idea how to go about automating that, and I suspect it would probably be on the screen more or less permanently, but I reckon it's a useful tool.

just take some permanent marker and write it on your monitor. chances are it's gonna be right 99% of the time.

Low tech tip: A postit on the bottom of the screen that says: "it's illogical?"
And on the back:
Right branch?
Rebased?
Pull latest tools?
Beer a clock?

Every damn day. Never fails.

Not exactly but imagine an alert on an interval that every 5 mins or so launches a pop up that says “check your branch dumbass”

It could even have buttons in the pop up that said

“Thanks, I’ll definitely fuck this up again. Remind me in 5 mins”

Or

“Ok I’m on the correct branch, leave me alone for 25 minutes”

Built in pomodoro timer.

Great idea for vscode plugin that says with big letters which branch you are on, like top of the screen, big letters, eye hurting color backgrounds.

I might even spare some time to make it