Man, the effort it takes to build a solid foundation in Computer Science. 3 years absolute minimum, 5 years recommended, 10 years so you can start relaxing more because you can rely on your foundation.

Helps if it truly interests you and breathe bitches and bytes.

@retoor Rofl. Well, not every single little aspect or skill interests me. Don't give me programming for old systems as a job. As with anything, things become unpleasant when you turn a hobby or talent into a job.

@CaptainRant things lose their love if you're coerced into doing them

@jestdotty That's right.

@CaptainRant Give me one of those sounds fun AF

@CaptainRant jobs aren't supposed to coerce

what I mean is the "a hobby becomes a job" isn't getting at what's actually causing the disillusionment. it's not that it's a job. it's if the atmosphere at the job is one of fear

I used to be bothered by this. I liked programming but a job ruined it. then I couldn't program even on my own time. and it's not that I didn't like programming. it was the greatest thing I ever found in the world. so it caused distress for me to not be able to do it anymore, and then aimlessness and depression

turns out I hung on to baggage from the job. the coercion and fear they kept trying to put into my head

and the kicker is in Canada coercive environments allow you to literally sue your employer. but they told me everywhere was like that and that it was normal. is it normal or not? cuz I haven't worked since and I can't bring myself to

@jestdotty The keyword you have struck; fear indeed. Be great at this and deliver inhuman amounts of work in short time so client is big fucking smiling. lol. Or else they put you off for review. Yes, that's fear alright.

You're right, disconnecting from the baggage is the key thing to do to regain yourself.

Normal.. hm, let me pull up from my experiences... First job.. pressure, coercion. Second job, same thing. Third job was a bit more relaxed but in the end still same thing. Fourth job disguised coercion. lol.

It's hard to put a finger on it because while they aren't forcing you, they're getting upset if you don't keep up with the rhythm and if you don't learn fast enough for their desires, like a rabbit.

One thing I learned is that they will all smile in your face and have a nice watercooler chat.. up until the point you're not good enough for them and then they put you on review, which is the worst experience you could ever have at a job.

@CaptainRant oh that doesn't even sound bad to me lol

I never had issues keeping up. I find others waste a lot of time on things that are useless and I'm coerced to have to participate in them though even though unnecessary

@jestdotty Like big, pointless meetings? lol

@CaptainRant ye

like all the code is done but I'm getting 2 weeks of useless meetings... and when I said stuff back suddenly we're doing "anonymous peer review" and somebody said I wasn't a team player and that was the only negative comment on the whole thing

I guess I also had code issues with a lead last time. she was not very smart but she was oddly territorial. like I added extra log lines... because a guy from another department was trying to trace some data and had a meeting with me because he couldn't figure out what was going on, to run his test data. well I couldn't figure out what was going on either because there are no log lines. so I added them. she called my commit a "red flag" saying I changed too much and literally just deleted the branch... bruh wtf

just kept insulting me to others and threatening me in private when she figured out I had a habit of trying to make things better zzzz

@jestdotty Blargh, sounds like typical industry. Unfortunately there are assholes everywhere.