Need to send a mail to a more senior member of the team. Could use a hand translating the below into something more work appropriate.

"You have reached a new level of wrong, you insufferable prick, please just shut up and leave"

@g-m-f certainly accomplishes the desire for him to leave. No confusion there.

I don't think it captures the "you are an idiot" portion though, feel that needs to be conveyed.

@practiseSafeHex @g-m-f "FUCK OFF TWAT!!!"

@yarwest hhhmm, closer

but will he understand WHY i'm calling him a twat?

@practiseSafeHex "Fuck off you stupid user client!"

Go Home, you're drunk. (so if i get this i know i pissed someone off)

Pretty please, with sugar on top, goband clean your fuckin car?

"please go play on the highway"

"I strongly object the decision that you have taken. It is clear to me that the direction that you have taken is creating a huge problem. Case in point:

1. Bla bla bla bla
2. Bla bla bla bla
3. Bla bla bla

Let's deconstruct your reasoning and remove all ambiguities one by one for to clear everything once and for all. Please reply to each and every point below:

1. Yada yada yada yad
2. Yada yada yada yada
3. yada yada yada

I hope this conversation will can bring us out of this mess. We really need to do this the right way."

"No offence, but I just don't agree with your outlook on things!
Let me put it this way.... You know I love apple products.
Even if you were an Apple device, I'd buy android."

*mic drop*

"Hey thanks. By the way, your code looks like it was designed by Jony Ive [kissyface]"

How about - Wow! You came up with that all by yourself?