Sit down before you read this.

So I interviewed a guy for a "Support Engineer" internship position.

Me and the team lead sit down and are waiting for him to enter, but apparently he's actually making a coffee in the kitchen.

This isn't exactly a strike since the receptionist told him that he can go get a drink, and we did too. It's just always expected for him to get a glass of water, not waste 3 minutes brewing a coffee.

In any case he comes in, puts the coffee on the table, then his phone, then his wallet, then his keys and then sits on our side of the table.
I ask him to sit in front of us so we can see him. He takes a minute to pack and tranfer himself to the other side of the table. He again places all of the objects on the table.

We begin, team lead tells him about the company. Then I ask him whether he got any questions regarding the job, the team or the company . For the next 15 minutes he bombards us with mostly irrelevant and sometimes inappropriate questions, like:
0: Can I choose my own nickname when getting an email address?
1: Does the entire department get same salaries?
2: Are there yoga classes on Sundays only or every morning?
3: Will I get a car?
4: Does the firm support workspace equality? How many chicks are in the team?
5: I want the newest grey Mac.

And then.. Then the questions turn into demands:
6: I need a high salary (asks for 2.5 more than the job pays. Which is still a lot).
I ask him why would he get that at his first job in the industry (remind you, this is an internship and we are a relatively high paying company).
He says he's getting paid more at his current job.
His CV lists no current job and only indicates that he just finished studying.
He says that he's working at his parent's business...
Next he says that he is very talented and has to be promoted very quickly and that we need to teach him a lot and finance his courses.

At this point me and the team lead were barely holding our laughs.

The team lead asks him about his English (English is not our native language).
He replies "It's good, trust me".
Team lead invites him for an English conversation. Team lead acts like a customer with a broken internet and the guy is there to troubleshoot. (btw that's not job related, just a simple scenario)
TL: "Hello, my name is Andrew, I'm calli..."
Guy: *interrupts* "Yes, yes, hi! Hi! What do you want?"
TL: "Well, if you let me fi..."
Guy: "Ok! Talk!"
TL: "...inish... My internet is not working."
Guy: "Ok, *mimics tuning a V engine or cooking a soup* I fixed! *points at TL* now you say 'yes you fixed'".

Important to note that his English was horrible. Disregarding the accent he just genuinely does not know the language well.

Then he continiues with "See? Good English. Told you no need to check!".

After about half a minute of choking on out silent laughter I ask him how much Python experience he has (job lists a requirement of at least 1 year).
He replies "I'm very good at object oriented functional programming".
I ask again "But what is your experience? Did you ever take any courses? Do you have a git repository to show? Any side.."
*he interrupts again* "I only use Matlab!".

Team lead stands up and proceeds to shake his hand while saying "we will get back to you".

At last the guy says with a stupid smile on his face "You better hire me! Call me back tomorrow." Leaves TL hanging and walks away after packing his stuff into the pockets.

I was so shocked that I wasn't even angry.
We both laughed for the rest of the day though. It was probably the weirdest interview I took part at.

  • 140
    Sooooo did he get the job?
  • 65
    @RazorSh4rk To be fair a month later the team lead hired someone very similar to this guy. So we didn't lose much.
  • 126
    He knows object oriented functional programming! Sounds like he knows his stuff. Better give him that grey Mac.
  • 15
    Are u guys in india??? I do have a git repo to show for my work.
  • 26
    @kgbemployee There are lots of companies that don't have any competent people involved in the hiring process, confidence can be enough to get you your dream job, no matter how unqualified you are. (There was a recent example of this in the USA involving an orangutan).
  • 5
    That's just embarrassing. Jesus Christ! How can people be this stupid and demanding?
    I at least have some stuff to show for the things I've done.
  • 18
    Was reading his question list. No. 1, if the whole departement receives the same salary, seams like an okay question to me. In my opinion the salary structure should be as transpare t as possible and fpr a position every person should get the same salary (sure, a senior should earn more than a junior, but like all the juniors should earn the same, or have the same base salary with increases by a known amount/percentage).

    Until that point I thought, well it's not that bad... I mean it's bad, but yeah... But the shitshow that followed... Oh boy!
  • 30
    the sad thing is, a lot of people with the required skillset aren't as confident in themselves as this guy apparently is
  • 6
    Bloody hell, you are most courteous not showing him the door sooner, wow! Kudos for sticking till the end of that farce...
  • 2
    @olezhka I've seen "Kudos" a few time now, but no idea what it stands for. Would you care to enlight me? (:
  • 31
    This is what happens to those kids whose parents spend their entire time telling them they are special snowflakes and they are brilliant at everything. Sometimes you just gotta say "Billy, you tried really hard at this and I'm proud of you for that. But unless you're determined and willing to put in thousands of hours of hard work, maybe you should go back to flower arranging."
  • 1
    @Wack I would lie if I said I knew the exact etymology of this word, but it sounds like it originated from greek language; as for the usage - praise for having done something!
  • 4
    I think the question here is does he know function oriented object programming?
  • 0
    Man, you have really a bad luck with interns (or willing to be)
  • 2
    Best rant ever! 😂
  • 0
    @jirehstudios Scala and F# are prominent examples for functional object-oriented languages
  • 7
    I wish I could fix problems by mimicing a v8 engine or making soup. I like soup.
  • 1
    @ClemFrieckie I don't think that I did. I'm used to being able to laugh and then quickly take a breath and speak seriously to a customer. So this comes handy.

    @coldfire not in India, sorry. :)

    @kgbemployee in our modern PC world people are not experiencing enough physical violence. Thus they grow up with huge balls and egos. Also @shiv379 described it really well.

    @olezhka I hate those arrogant jerks but on the other hand I also love trolling so I had to stay and listen.

    @Wack Kudos is basically "congratulations". Comes from Greek.

    @stacked I was appointed for the interns. So yeah :D
  • 1
    I wouldn't be angry too, kinda impressed to be honest.. I mean, I most certainly know the type, but usually I don't meet it in IT 😏
  • 0
    At my first internship my supervisor told me a similar story about a uni student having high demands with 0 experience. After the interview he told him he better change his attitude or he will never get a job.
  • 1
    We are hitting douche levels that shouldnt be possible!
  • 7
    The reason for confidence.
  • 2
    Get this man a stressball
  • 0
    Had one of those more than once, they make good jokes 🤣
  • 1
    Wow that was quality entertainment. Pay him three times what the job pays.
  • 1
    lol how many chicks in the team. this is a company not a dating website
    a new car, and a gray mac! for fuck sake you should have threw him out of the building when he asked for those ...
  • 0
    This is what you get for curling parents.
  • 2
    BTW, hilarious rant! Most entertaining :D
  • 1
    LOL this intern is crazy !!
  • 1
    @mrUnfused He doesn't seem to have all the necessary libraries installed :)
  • 1
  • 2
    It is a blessing when people are this honest. His life lesson will come to him quicker than most 😏
  • 2
    @BrokeTheInteger I bet he was promoted to a regional manager by his Mom.
  • 1
    @Noob Perhaps you should have called his parents for references X-D
  • 1
    "How many chicks are in the team?"
    I wouldn't hire someone if they said that.
Add Comment