18
Wisecrack
285d

Who am I?

Some of you, because of the hyperbolic, outrageous, trollish, and often self-satirical nature of my posts, might doubt me. Thats completely relatable.

Heres the truth:
I was diagnosed in childhood with ADHD, fucking everyone, every male, these days is diagnosed with that. I was diagnosed bipolar. Hell anyone reading my posts could see that from a mile away. I was diagnosed on the borderline personality spectrum. Yeah, I could see that.

I was tested. They said I was in the 98th percentile for clerical ability, not extraordinary but pretty good, mathematical ability a little higher than that. My SAT was 1491. Not yale material, but I coulda been someone.

Over the years I studied a LOT of politics and read a metric fuckton of books. (40+ books over the course of three years).

I predicted every single presidential election since bush juniors second election. Three supreme court picks. Senatorial elections. Congresional elections. More than that.

I have a better analysis track record than some of the multidecade analysts sitting in the fucking NSA.

No I am not shitting you. No I am not exaggerating.

It's about the only claim to fame I get to legitimately make.

People ask me, "then why aren't you famous?"

How do you know I'm not.

Look I'm gonna tell you my actual name.
My real name is Lawrence B. Lindsey

Okay, I'm bullshitting for fun. But words I have written on alt twitter accounts have legitimately come out of presidential hopeful's mouths. No, this I am *not* bullshitting you about.

Imagine that. A guy who lived in his parents attic for five years, writing words that came out of presidential candidates mouths.

At one time I was about as popular and influential as that fuckboy catturd.

yes, really. No I am not fucking joking.

Under normal conditions I wouldn't talk about this or reveal it, because who the fuck cares? I'm just some dude on the internet, drunk, both on alcohol, and the pseudo-anonymous equivalent of bragging rights.

You know how many women I turned down because I could? You know how fucking drunk I am? They say a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts. Well, I'm not usually honest like this because the internet is full of false braggarts, and you tell people the truth and they don't fucking believe you.

I swear, it seems like I made some faustian bargain at some time, and can achieve no fame or lasting wealth in my life--to save my life.

Shit, I was talking to a chinese women who ran a bank in china (yes, really), who advised me to buy into bitcoin early on. Didn't have the money to. Woulda been a fucking millionaire if I did.
*Non-obvious* Ideas that major corporations are now persuing? Yeah those were sitting in my card index since the early 2000s.

I helped two people build and sell businesses. One for me tens of thousands. Another for millions. Yes, really. Got zero, and I mean, *zero* credit for it.

Point is, doesn't matter how famous you are, or coulda been, Doesn't matter the ideas you have, or had.

The world doesn't promote runners-up, or hasbeens, or wannabes, or could-bes.

What matters is execution.

If you're wandering through life, wondering when you're lucky break will be, stop. You have to realize, you make your own luck. Recognize the difference between what you can control, and what you can, and work on promoting your own ideas or business or values, instead of other people's dreams.

And for those wondering, yes I am drunk, and no, I ain't fucking kidding you in anything I wrote here.

The most important lesson I learned is this:
First work on your own success, before you work on the success of others.

p.s.

I give surprisingly good advice for someone who doesn't benchmark well on traditional measures of success. I know, even I was shocked when I looked at the statistics.

Comments
  • 7
    Hello fellow worthy human.
    Pleasure meeting you.

    - Smart but not proportionately successful
    - Visionary
    - Others piggyback on your ideas to get rich

    Is your real name Nikola Tesla ?
  • 7
    My man.

    At least I myself don't give a shit if you are famous or not, or your self-perceived or self-denied achievements, or how many women you did, or pretended, or turned you down.

    From my limited knowledge, you are a fucking virtuoso of math, and I don't lie in saying I wish I could handle it the way you do.

    And yeah, you might not rank well on the "traditional" scale of "success", but in the end, the question is whether you are happy with what you do, and if it serves (or have another gig) that adequately supports you.

    For the rest, none are really qualified to give advice on anything, but I myself sure know that I'd listen to yours over any of the billions of fucktards on the internet.
  • 9
    Tl;dr
    Some girl approached OP once and he said he would grab her by the pussy.
  • 4
    @electrineer unfortunately not the reality. the truth is I was a fucking tard, a legit tard that turned down five different women at one time.

    I might be forgetting a few.

    Christianity and abstinence are overrated. Get while the getting is good.
  • 2
    @CoreFusionX hey thanks. I can assure you the advice I give, if utilized by others, will lead to great success. As long as I'm not the one following the advice for some mindboggling reason.
  • 4
    you're a math wizard to me bruh...
  • 4
    How much did you drink young man?
  • 5
    @retoor Just the right amount, I think.
  • 5
    @Wisecrack As long as I’ve known you on here, you’ve been pretty awesome. Crazy as hell, but awesome. ^^
  • 5
    @Root hell yeah.

    I've sobered up a little but not enough to facepalm at this entire rant yet.
  • 2
    @Wisecrack 6 hours and still not sober? Damn!
  • 2
    @retoor bourbon, about a fifth.

    I have this thing where I get drunk super easy (like five beers in), but then once there, I can keep going even though I should be in a coma, lol.

    What do you drink?
  • 2
    @ViRaS Only in a pixar themed universe with cars that talk for some god damn reason.
  • 1
    @CoreFusionX "At least I myself don't give a shit if you are famous or not"

    You sound really chill.

    We're definitely gonna have to party together.
  • 2
    @SidTheITGuy some would say a meth wizard.

    apples to oranges, but whose keeping track anyway?
  • 4
    nah it don't matter to me, you are our local math wizard and I like you.

    Cheers bud!
  • 4
    @AleCx04 Alright, you're invited to the orgy.

    Theres eight people here and half of them were asking for you anyway, but I needed an EXCUSE to invite you first.

    Bring party favors.
  • 4
    tldr, oh its @wisecrack <upvote!>
  • 2
    @Wisecrack I don't drink
  • 2
    @retoor eh?

    Hey thats a-ok. Some people it just isn't there thing.

    Important thing is to have a good time.
  • 2
    @Wisecrack their* god dammit.

    THEIR

    T

    H

    E

    I

    R
  • 4
    This honestly reads like the "I was in the navy seals" copypasta

    https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/...

    If you're so good at giving advice, then why don't you follow your own advice? Surely there's something that someone in your situation can do specifically that is both doable, within your moral limits and profitable. Right?

    Hell, you should be owning several big companies now, just find a "normie" to do the heavy lifting and you'll stay as the brain behind the operation. You should be the Wozniak to your Jobs.

    Honestly, words can only mean "so much". Everyone can type words about how good they are, but what matters is actual merit and actions.

    Hell, I had at least a dozen of ideas that big corporations employed a decade later after I thought about them, but that doesn't mean I was the first one to have them, people probably think the same things all the time all over the world. Doesn't mean you're better than anyone honestly.
  • 2
    By the way I think your posts are elliptic rather than hyperbolic.
    Some confused ones might even say parabolic.
  • 1
    It’s ok bb - moments in the past don’t matter that much, all of us make mistakes, and you don’t have to be perfect in order to live a happy life. It’s like Emil Cioran says: “I’m simply an accident, why take it all so seriously?”
  • 0
    @Nanos enjoy ur life
  • 1
    This is sad
  • 3
    I would love to sit with you at a bar and philosophize about the world and everything!
    Never change.
  • 3
    @PonySlaystation boring. He's into whipping too. Just sayin'
  • 3
    @retoor That's the kind of info I needed, will bring my whip!
  • 1
    O, @wisecrack on the wall, who's the stupidest of them all?
  • 2
    If you are bipolar consider the possibility this rant about how awesome you are might be the overconfidence one feels about himself during mania (it is so devastating when it ends…). Not sure if you are able to consider that though, I couldn’t, one feels so sure about everything.
  • 1
    @cucatrap No unfortunately not mania. Reviewing this 100 days later, everything I wrote remains true.

    I go to pretty painstaking lengths not to brag about shit I haven't done, simply because of my step-dad doing the very thing I'm avoiding.

    Sometimes a bad example is better than a good one, or no example at all.
  • 0
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