Guys, when you have to manually edit records in the prod DB, please at least make sure that your overweight cat isn't rolling around on the keyboard...

Fuck you cock sucking turd licking MS Teams.
What kind of assrat did code you into the marooned abomination you are?
I will take the timeachine and retroactively abort your devs.

Why are people behaving like communist dramaqueens on every OSS repo?
Why do OSS libraries and frameworks have to be political cunts and insert *the current thing* into every god damn console message of their tooling and on their websites?
Stop it. Get some help.
I want to code, not be a aborted political SJW fetus. Let me fucking code in peace.

Biggest worry? Having to deal with shitty specifications from random customers.

What would you do, if the project manager was constantly verbally attacking you for no apparent reason?
Wong answers only.

How to log in to CMS Of Doom™...
What could go wrong?
MD5 password hashing? HTTP links? Extracting the whole $_POST array?

So I've started learning Rust and I must say it feels great! But some parts of the language, like enums, are quite different than what I'm used to.
As a proof of concept I've reimplemented a small API (an Azure Function App) in Rust with Actix Web and it's FAST AS FUCK BOIII.
The response is served about 5x as quckly and the memory footprint shrinked from some 90 MB to around 5 MB.
In my small scale usecase it's not a huge difference, but I think it can be massive at large scales...
What is your experience with Rust (at scale)?

I wish I could quickly reimplement the whole fucking CMS Of Doom™ in Rust... but no time and resources :(

legacy = la gagga

Pipi and kaka

Stairway to hell...

My sanity... there is only so much legacy shit one can endure until it's gonesky...

Fuck first level support.
Usually the users are the problem because they don't know how to reboot or they delay software updates to infinity if you give them the option.

Additionally, having to log in on a user's computer, I always feel like I'm entering a messy's appartment. How can they live like that?
Fucking imbeciles.

I got terminal white-space autism because of the CMS Of Doom.
Forgetting one or adding one too many leads to major problems on prod.

Oh boy, my riskiest coding decision was certainly that one time when I refactored some 50k lines of critical legacy shit code in 3 days, straight up merged everything into master and then deployed to prod.
Luckily there was only one minor bug I had to fix after that... phew...
(To my defense: I was solo-working on it - the infamous CMS Of Doom™)

Fuck all this legacy shit. I'm buying a strip club on the bahamas, seeya!

How I see GPU brands:
- Team blue, Intel:
Oldschool autistic engineers, working GPU but not practical
- Team red, AMD:
Competitive but anarchist, horrid Windows drivers, but good on opensource, anti-mainstream
- Team green, nVidia:
Way too greedy cunts circlejerking each others off during breaks (like Apple employees), delivering on performance, but wayyy overpriced and scammy tactics

Mommy Microsoft really wants all your data in Windows 11.
The Facebook of operating systems.

Oh boy... something just happened I'd have never expected.
Remember my rants about the PHP CMS Of Doom™?
Guess what... the boss of said company just called me to offer me a job as their new tech lead. WTF.

I'd rather slowly impale myself on a rusy pickaxe.
I'd rather tattoo my face with a giant, pulsating, uncircimcised shlong.
I'd rather take a swim in a pool of Hydrogen fluoride.
I'd rather work 80h/wk on pimple extraction.

"thir" will be the new gender-inclusive form of "this".
Example:
thir.printPronouns();

I think a good path to dev education is if you are interested in it as a teen and try out coding and keep failing. Persistence and interest will bring you farther than just going straight to uni/dev school.

Date of doom... they forgot the double quotes...
(btw. $dateString is in the form "1234-10-11")
The fun part is that this comparison fails because $dateString is not numeric (due to "-") thus won't be (non-strictly) equal to 0 (int).

Damn fuucking amateurs... all hacks no skill.

Damn, it's quite refreshing to work on some C#.NET microservices instead of the usual PHPTSD in the CMS Of Doom™...

My favourite non-dev hobby: Waste time watching Youtube videos...

It's a config file. This is illegal.

Santa has come early this year...

My biggest dev career dream is to have a useful SaaS with a solid user base and then reduce work to 40-50% and use the rest of the time for hobby projects and a family.

Life changing tech stack:
Programmer Having Pain + My Sickening Quality (of) Life

300k LOC 💫

They actually did it...
Cheezus Crust, they actually "generated" 3 HTML selects to let a user chose a Date.
(nvm the line numbers, it ends at 3000)

They didn't even bother to generate the fucking arrays lol

You know a Repo is fucked when you have to rely on global text search to find and rename symbols like method or class names.