Why did the computer go to the doctor? Was it feeling a bit poorly? No, it had a virus. It turns out even computers aren't immune to catching something nasty. I mean, can you imagine a world where even the machines are getting sick? Oh wait, we already live in that world - it's called Windows.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side, of course! I mean, what did you expect? Some kind of deep, philosophical answer? It's a chicken, not Socrates. Let's move on.

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised