I want a tool called "bogo-npm" which creates a VM and then installs random versions of npm and dependencies in a cycle until the build is successful. It'll probably be the biggest optimization that dogshit ecosystem has ever seen.

I'd just let it run over night and save myself the urges to strangle every single fucking developer who added dozens of dependencies to a stupid near-static website.
And the creator of the abomination called `npm uninstall` which for some fucking reason does the same as `npm install` and then obviously fails because that's the reason I wanted to remove that package in the first place.

We need more heroes like that leftpad dude.

It is incredible how Google got big with good webdesign and now manages to build the shittiest frontends.

It's not enough that YouTube is super slow and breaks every other time I use the "back" button in the browser. When it only forgot my language & theme settings every couple of months that was still too high quality for Google's dogshit standards, so now they made another downgrade: Whenever I set another language it immediately resets it to the language Google thinks I should speak, and at the same time resets the region to where Google thinks I live. Oh, and I have to disable autoplay for every video individually now cause who the fuck uses cookies nowadays right?

Do they also change the language if I travel to another country because those fucks never leave Silicon Valley and can't comprehend that concept?

Google is the Microsoft of web design.

Oh great, now garbage websites can even break the browser's reload button. Wanna reload the page that never stops loading or crashes its scripts? Click the button and watch the browser do fuck all and a little bit of nothing.

Nah, you see to refresh that polished rotten turd you gotta close the tab and then restore it, and if that doesn't work open a new one and copy-paste the URL because who the fuck doesn't like some invalid state.

Can't wait for the day I have to shutdown and disconnect the battery because some idiot messed up the layout.

Google dislikes tha- oh wait

Unreachable

Why the fuck didn't I discover FreeTube earlier?

It's a YouTube client that's faster, without the dark UI patterns, with an integrated ad blocker, download feature and the settings that were always missing.
And all subscriptions are stored offline so you don't even need a fucking account.

(Not) Surprising how pleasant it can be to use when the UI isn't literal garbage.

There's a special place in hell for the people responsible for PC screen menus. I'm sure they all just hate other people, this shit can only be intentional.

Are expensive screens better in that regard or do they all have this UX clusterfuck that's processed by a microchip Foxconn grabbed from their garbage can?

You know what I hate? Websites that run so much scripted internet-connected shit in the background that you'll either get a fat error message or even a "failed to load site" screen from the browser if you lose the connection for a few seconds.

What's the motherfucking point of a website when its requirements make it effectively a livestreaming service, despite the content being less dynamic than Zuckerberg's face in US congress?

I don't give a shit whether I have internet when I'm fucking reading, you asshats. And you don't need to remind me when my internet connection is disrupted, I think I'll notice that by myself the next time I click on something and your garbage site will take more than the usual 5 seconds to fucking load the background color.

So a porn company just bought the vidme domain and set up a redirect for all old vidme urls.

As a result, many websites like the Washington Post got porn videos embedded on a couple places.

This is so fucking hilarious. Maybe there's a slim chance they learn the lesson and stop shoving shitty autoplaying videos into their news articles.

https://vice.com/en/article/...

Mozilla, can you release your stupid UI updates once they're actually out of beta? The UI seems fine I guess, I don't care.

But why the fuck is the browser freezing up at least twice a day now? And why the fuck does it then restart with 1-2 fewer tabs but an additional tab that I had open half a week ago?

Maybe next time don't fire a quarter of your employees and then pay out the gain to your shitty CEO. If I wanted crashing browsers by shady companies there would be enough competition.

YouTube adding some real nuggets of wisdom to the comment section.

In other news, Google is all out of sane variable names and type checking.

Google, will you ever manage to fix YouTube so it actually doesn't fucking break every day?
This "feature" where the page doesn't reload when I click reload is neat until I want to, you know, reload to see new content. Or reload because you failed to load a single video thumbnail. But no, you managed to combine the shit of both worlds and give me a loading progress bar and then don't change anything.

Also YouTube is the prime example why you don't try to reinvent text input fields. I can't remember a single instance in the last 5 years where the comment fields didn't have at least one weird bug.

Why do tech companies build the shittiest websites?

I bet those shits at Paypal sure felt smart when they implemented their 2-factor authentication, not realising that phone numbers can change. It's not a fucking SSN assigned at birth, you geniuses.

And when you click on the help link the amazing tip they give you is "login and make sure your phone number is correct". DID YOU EVEN READ THE HORSESHIT YOU WROTE THERE?

The "cracy" in Idiocracy stands for bureaucracy.

That moment when you decide to look why Vim's regex rules are a bit inconsistent and find out this program has a setting called "very magic".

Today is a good day.

npm: "npm does not support Node.js v10.24.0; You should probably upgrade to a newer version"

Also npm: "Supported releases are the latest release of 4, 6, 7, 8, 9"

Uh...good to know this piece of software is still a dump where rejected code goes to rot.

So Twitter managed to break its content censorship system so hard that when you tweet the word "Memphis" it insta-bans your account for 12h.

This is hilarious. I had an account lying around and sure thing, within a single page refresh I was banned for mentioning a city in the US.

In case anyone wonders, writing "Memphis" as ban repeal comment seems to have no effect ;)

Is it just me or are image uploads broken? Whenever I attach a png file pressing the "Post" button does nothing. Text alone submits fine, so it's not because of my dumpster fire of a text.

It seems now I gotta rant about my failed attempt to post another rant because I'm in a ranting rant mood.

Dev: "presenting my privacy-focused XYZ app!"

App: is 100% online despite features I could build in fucking bash, has integration with 3 other sites

Me: [x] Doubt

Install a little tool on all machines that randomly discards every ~200th keyboard input.

Watch them suffer.

How to recognise a lie in 2021? You look if it starts with "We value your privacy"

Hmm...

When my Firefox window is too narrow devRant completely shits all over itself and glitches so hard that rants cannot be scrolled anymore unless I make the window larger and go apeshit on the scrollbar until it fixes itself again.

I thought my mouse broke.

(Neo)Vim. Nothing comes close, except Emacs after 2 weeks of configurations, and even then it's not nearly as consistent and fast.

Vim is one of the few programs that don't try to be smart and "help" me, and has the best approach to custom keybindings I've ever seen.

"Lockheed Martin Will Replace F-35's Faulty Computer System With Cloud-Based Programs"

WAT

So apparently those jets have such a fucked software that the recommended workaround is to use them offline and only reconnect them once every 30 days to keep the system running. It's so bad that two air force bases went back to an older system and the Israeli air force also replaced it for their own F-35 jets.

And somehow those stable geniuses think the correct solution is to make everything more network-dependent and apparently already put Kubernetes on a different line of jets.

I just can't stop laughing.

So flashing microcontrollers gets kinda annoying when you have to simultaneously fight Windows defender's urge to flag the flashing software as Trojan every 30 seconds like a 10 year old kid with ADHD that just discovered coffee.

It doesn't get easier when suddenly only one of three USB ports recognises thumb drives with the current Windows version, and only after two reboots.

Maybe I should just run it in a VM like the three remaining QA testers at Microsoft do, but on the other hand I don't really like the idea of flashing firmware from a VM. Just feels even dirtier.

Keyboard layouts/localization seem like something went horribly wrong and nobody decided to clean up the mess.

And now we have multiple layouts where the fucking alt key doesn't even work exactly the same between them, how is that even possible? And who thought it was a good idea to differentiate between left and right alt, shift and control keys, leading to subtle issues nobody asked for?

In Vim I made a keyboard shortcut with alt and on the British layout it only works with the left alt key, on the US layout on both. Wat.

What kind of seizure of insanity led the devs of Python to believe that static, mutable default parameters could be a good idea? You can literally share whole arrays between multiple calls of the same function with the same input, and the number of cases where a sane person would intentionally want to do that is FUCKING ZERO.

Didn't know the new hype operating system "others", but with 704% market share it's gotta be amazing!

I'm wondering when all the super amazing cloud apps will finally be able to sync notifications between devices. I mean this "problem" is solved for decades with unread emails etc., but somehow companies that get billions of dollars shoved into their arse can't seem to figure out that I don't want to receive all 57 notifications of the past week a second time whenever I turn on my tablet's wifi.

One might think that setting a fucking boolean flag in some database is not that hard when your service can stream 4k video to millions of people, but apparently I was mistaken.

How long will it take until Amazon finally does something against all these fucking review cheaters?
I looked for a spool of simple solder and...the first listed product had reviews for 3D printer filament and the second one's reviews were for a fucking drinking straw. You can still see the customer submitted pictures of their shitty coffees.

Amazon should just discard all reviews if the product name gets edited or something like that. Although at the same time I wonder how many people only look at the star rating if pulling this shit pays off for the seller.