When ever I start working on a project of some kind I usually find myself cursing the code, cursing myself and asking why I couldn't just go into something easier. But without fail, every single time I get the project working for the first time, I have a massive grin on my face and feel like a child at an amusement park for the first time. All the bad feelings I had towards the code dissolves and makes me excited to keep moving forward.

I've been working on a shader for the past few days. Lots of doing math on paper and switching to code to implement it. Yesterday after 3 or 4 hours of trying to figure out why nothing is rendering, I realized that I wrote all my * for multiplication as x. Visual Studio never let me know its a syntax error, and my fried brain saw no issue. Needless to saw my shader is still bugged to hell, but at least my multiplication works.

My family absolutely did not support me. Throughout my life my parents wanted me to become an accountant (like my sibling) and encouraged me to pursue that. In 8th grade I initially broke the news that I wanted to get into software development and was told "computers won't be around for another 10 years (this was probably around 2010), don't go into something so stupid". For reference, we had 1 family computer up til 2008 which we had limited amounts of time with.

Every year after, up until the end of 12th grade I told them I planned on going into software dev, and they got angrier each time, before finally they stopped speaking to me for a short time over that summer after I told them I had been accepted into university for computer science.

Now, in my final year, they still think i'm throwing my life away. Their disapproval is what has been motivating me the most, to prove to myself that I can support myself and create good things.