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Search - "root asks questions"
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!!fml
"Root, go fix this bug. It'll take you two days."
The "bug" is a feature that was never implemented for one particular payment type.
The code in question is two years old, full of typos, smells, junior-isms, and is convoluted AF. The feature's commit touched 190 files and implemented many other features as well. Thus far, I have been unable to narrow down where this particular feature's code lives for the other payment types, nor which code or payment paths lead to it. Burned out, I can barely focus on the screen, let alone follow its many twisting and dynamically-inferred paths. I hint as to the ticket's scavenger hunt nature during standup.
"But I wrote comments on the ticket telling you exactly where to look to fix it," Thundercunt admonishes in front of the team.
"Sure, you did," Root replies. "You reworded what the original dev had said in the comments 20 minutes prior, and agreed with him. His comments were helpful, but it doesn't tell me how any of it works," she continues.
TC scoffs and closes the meeting.
Root stares blankly, seeing neither code nor screen, questions her life decisions, and recalls the previous tickets she has worked on: nearly every one of them busywork, fixing other people's bugs. Bugs she never could have gotten away with if she tried.
"Why do I put up with this?" She asks. "They don't care, and it's killing me."
But the bills remain, and so must she.
"Fuck my life" she finally decides.20 -
I think I've finally realized something:
my boss does not actually listen to me.
Quite often during out weekly conference calls, he asks me questions about things I had just covered. I always assumed he couldn't hear because a) i'm rather quiet, and b) freeconferencecall.com bloody sucks.
But it happens for written things, too. I type an update on something in Slack, and an hour later he asks me for an update on it. I always assumed (likely correctly) that he has nearly zero reading comprehension. He writes like a 5th grader and only remembers a few nouns and one verb from anything he reads. But I swear he actively skips reading anything I write.
Now, however, I have frigign' proof that he ignores me. We have both been trying to get ahold of {Clover contractor} via email for months. We have gotten three replies, but twice scheduling prevented setting up a meeting, and once I simply missed the email amongst the flood of log spam I haven't been allowed to address.
I have asked the boss multiple times for the guy's phone number -- in emails, in Slack, and in front of everyone during our weekly conference calls -- and he has totally ignored me every. single. time.
Here's a transcript of my seventh(!) attempt:
Boss [2:13 PM]
Have you and {Clover contractor} met yet? If not make it happen. Stop letting it not happen. GIve specific dates and times. {Clover contractor} let's talk Tuesday 2pm or Wednesday 4pm which works better for you.
Root [2:14 PM]
For the seventh and last time, give me his phone number.
Getting ahold of him via email has not worked.
Boss [2:14 PM]
I am sendning one more, from that I want you to make the meeting happen asap.
Root [2:14 PM]
if i call him, setting up a meeting will be _easy_
Give me his phone number and I will handle this.
It is now 3:00pm and I haven't gotten a response.
Either he doesn't want it to happen, wants me to fail for some reason, or he's totally fucking oblivious. Yet ofc it's me who earns all of the blame when this meeting doesn't happen, and I'm likely to get yelled at in front of everyone, fucking again.
I'm really beginning to hate this guy.
I can't wait to walk out on him and watch the company come crashing down in my absence. It'll be sad to watch, but bloody hell does he deserve it for his arrogant incompetence.14 -
I built a feature. I asked questions for days. Nobody helped. I built it anyway, and while I'm not sure it's quite right, it works.
During a code review, I asked for clarification on who the fuck it's for. Simple fucking question. Didn't get an answer. I did get the same crap response twice, though. It's great because it both doesn't answer my question and makes things worse.
Let's refer to this as "branding." Here we go!
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Root: "Should this be changed to blue? I'm not sure who the end-user is."
TC: "should be purple, then call it something more convenient" (...what?)
Root: "Better phrasing: if we use the feature, it should match our colors and be blue. If customers use it, it should match their colors and be red. It shouldn't be both. I looked through everything again, and i'm convinced that it's only for us, so it should be blue so it matches everything."
TC: "this should be purple, and then call it something [sic] red" (...what!? also: lolcopypaste)
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But like, that's wrong in every single way. It's internal, not external. Doing both makes it confusing. Doing both and calling it external is fucking stupid. Did she even read the PR? or any of my questions? ugh.
I swear, it's like arguing with a boulder and expecting it to listen. An ugly, oversized boulder that comically resembles Jabba the Hutt. No joke.
Whatever, it can be purple. Later, if someone complains that it's confusing, I'll just link them to the damned PR. Then again, almost everything here is confusing AF, so I doubt anyone will actually notice.
Screw this place. So glad I'm on my way out.rant thundercunt the ugly boulder responds jabba the hutt root asks questions root has a code review6