Every time I do a dirty fix and someone in my MR comments "have you investigated the root cause" I wanna kill myself.

No bro, I havent investigated the root cause because this ticket is 3 months old and was passed around like a hot potato from team to team until it got assigned to me.

If you want I can add a comment to refactor this in the future. As far as Im concerned any refactors are out of scope, also I atleast came up with some kind of solution that noone else was able to in 3 months. So im not gonna waste my time on refactoring this piece of shit code under immense pressure from management who thinks it was me who dragged this ticket for 3 months.

Its working, it doesnt cause any side effects, we all gonna die soon and nothing really matters, so fuck off.

The ultimate "I am vegan" guy will be arch linux user, vegan, trans, crossfitter and cryptocurrency investor. I've just met guy like this in my job. He did not shut up for a while. I am not sure whats he doing and whats his job but my guess is that hes paid for spreading cancer, sucidal toughts and eatig your will to live and talk with people...

R - retard
M - me

R: Hey CopyPasteCode I found this bug, it does 'this' insted of 'this'. *spreads arms to see his "muscles"*
M: *headphones off* Ok, I will look into it... *headphones back on*
R: Btw you invested something in the crypto, didnt you? Ive invested... ...bitcoin... ...crypto... ...litecoin..., do you think that... ...something... ...bla bla bla?
M: *tries not to kill myself after his 5 minutes of monolog* Ye sure
R: By the way Ive found this awesome vegan restaurant that accepts litecoin, would you like to come sometime?
M: *10 minutes monolog about vegan food and shit. At this point I want to die* Ok, I will now work on that back, see you later.
R: ye sure bro (wtf, "bro"?)... *looks like hes walking away* *teleports on my otger side touching my monitor*
WOW you are also a Limux user? 😮 Ivr installed arch linux this weekand and its so awesome, *another 6 minutes of monolog*
M: *smiling and preparing to kill him or myself* Nice, awesome *fake smile*
R: Anyway, I gotta go (FINALLY!!!), btw, I am going to the *name of local trans and gay club*, wanna go with me?
M: *after a month after a breakup with my GF (because she was cheating on me) which everyone in the office knew...)* Not really *trying to thing how to say "fuck off" without having meeting with HR*, I cant, I already have somethimg.
R: Oh, ok. Btw, you are rly cool bro (again), we should hang. We should hangout more often...

I hope someone is paying me for loosing 27 minutes with this guy.

seconds into 2019

I see one incompetent fucker asking to eval in Node.js..
A FUCKING FETCH OF A NPM MODULES IN CDNJS

you know what's the reason?

node_modules

Fucking kill me unless you're some dumb bitch who uses npm modules like some braindead motherfucker who doesn't know what a number is, node_modules takes only an average of 3.6MB

Compared to RubyGems who takes 40+
Or Pip

Seriously stop this. I wanna hang myself because my 2019 put me in a shit mood

i normally go to tasks with great enthusiasm. later that day, i realize the scope of the task, and i wanna kill myself

My Software Developing Skills finally paid off... I've spent whole night repairing a shitty Zanussi Washing machine. My life meaning was fulfilled
..

None of my localhost calls were getting through, either through postman or through app. I wasted nearly an hour and then realised my NO_PROXY was configured with ; instead of , I wanna kill myself right now 😫

My Current goals:

1. get new glasses for first time in 4 years
2. get permit then license then get my first car
3. get a new job that doesn't make me wanna kill myself every day and i actually feel like i'm doing something (car opens up distance opportunities)
4. figure out new goals

When I have to updates the apps for the second company of my boss:
5 apps, 4 different projects, 4 stores.
Each app with different VR SDK, which makes the differences minimal, but still can't merge the projects.

It takes about 1h to build all of the apps (like 30m just for the iOS ones), 5minutes to 5 days to make the edits, 1-2 weeks of debugging and testing, plus the time the stores take to actually publish the apps

Always makes me wanna kill myself

Having just endured 30 excruciating minutes of utter braindead idiocy that is trying to setup and configure WPA2-Enterprise on a Windows 10 machine, I wanna go and fucking kill myself.

How can it be so bad after so many years this protocol has been out?! Not only can the authentication options be changed only in the who knows how many years old control panel settings and not the modern settings app, but once you finish setting up the network, you can no longer modify some of the key attributes like which CA certificates to validate the radius server against!

What. The. Fuck. Microsoft.

I swear, I don't usually get my jimmies rustled at work, but this... This just bloody infuriated me!

SO's accepted answers being "no dont do what you want to do, use this corporate™-certified library instead, we ALLLLL use it too"
Like bitch if I wanna kill myself with a knife, tell me which vein to cut, dont recommend me a gun, I dont want it. ffs.

Do the first project for a cheap price, I swear I will pay you more money for the next ones.

I've heard this so many times now, it actually makes me wanna kill myself when I hear it again from someone new.

I wanna kill math rn. I’m in algebra 1 for the second year in a row and instead i spent an hour till I found this app so I can rant instead of getting it done …..and im like 3 weeks behind. Idk what to do with myself rn