My colleagues excel at envisaging shit extracurricular activities. It may not be so godawful irritating if they weren't hypocritical scum, all of them but ESPECIALLY, the girls. When you're sick, nobody checks on you. When you text them, they don't reply. They only initiate conversations to get something. They are never friendly except they need a favor and have run out of options. You can't borrow more than one 1k naira from any during an emergency. Then they force you against your will to oblige them

Last year, they came up with this crappy cook fest assigning dishes each staff is to cook and present like some science expo project. I declined but participation was enforced. Things went sour with the caterer I recruited. Work that day was a living hell for me, I eventually had to leave

Next, they devised an end of year dinner, instead of converting all that money to a much needed 13th month salary or even bonuses. Thankfully, attendance was not compulsory so I and one other girl could exempt. Why would I buy/borrow dress code costumes at such short notice, to assemble with a bunch of people who think I'm crap?

This year again, they roped me into this dumb "love feast" program for valentine. I was livid and incensed. I stormed the inbox of one of the male instigators and gave him a piece of my mind. This scoundrel literally shakes my hand irl like it's covered in poop. Nowadays, he waltzes into my office without the courtesy to greet me. I'm so inconsequential and insignificant. He ordered me to delete the messages, implying he might leak them like the ex hr once did. Of course, I refused

The girl they paired me to buy gifts for doesn't reply my chats. I literally sent some that morning but she had the audacity to walk up to me and tell me what she wants me to buy her. It's our bosses fancy mug and my next seat buddy immediately tells me how crazy expensive it is

They've all got read notifications turned off. It's not even creepy messages or require deep thinking or lengthy replies. It's just not being regarded worthy to be communicated with. These are the people I'm going to spend a dime on. They don't even TRY to pretend I'm a human being. Literally don't talk to me but everyone else plays with each other. Personally, I'm not a gift person. I NEVER buy myself anything unless it's an absolute necessity. So why would I rack my brain, go out of my way to get you some shit you aren't even going to appreciate? It's a waste of money and intentions. They claim it helps with team bonding. I'm sore and bitter cuz that is a lie. Those interested in each other go home together, outings, sleep together, reply each other's messages. They don't need some formal carnival to do any of that

Messages are the most basic things. It's utterly insulting cause everyone always has their devices holstered. They respond to the boss instantly when tagged on the group. Any act of not communicating directly, is both deliberate and a passive declaration of war. So why drag me into your annoying shows? Do your clique thing however you want. Leave me the hell out of it

Google maps is undisputedly, the worst software curse ever unleashed on the human race. You're far better off asking directions from a stray dog or a foraging hen. How is this disease still legal to obtain and reside on people's phones when it's so misleading? Yesterday was not the first time it made me get lost but it was definitely the worst cause some Abuja roads are vast and are not plied by commercial vehicles /public transport

12km on foot is marathon numbers. As a boy, I regularly trekked 6.2km from my school home. I would never in my right senses contemplate it after growing up. I can't explain how poor this "app" is. Is it a ui issue translating the instructions visually? Cuz why would the arrow swing towards a position that's going to take 30x original projection? Why are there no haptic feedbacks warning you that you're veering extremely off course? It simply replots and destination seems attainable till you cross the rubicon

Or maybe it's so successful and the fault lies with me because my thick head did not develop the wiring to crack maps. Perhaps, it's a miracle that I'm able to walk unaided, to the places I frequent

Rare day I used 3 different languages in a professional capacity (php, java, flutter). *insert "I used to pray for times like this" meme

The Facebook web app (on mobile) is so incredibly garbage in a foul, vile way; no client would have accepted it if I was the one who delivered it. Its Twitter counterpart is fairly functional despite all the js fidelity. Some things still behave as you are accustomed to. Facebook tried to hijack ALL native browser capability and ended up releasing an abominable artifact that should be a disgraceful, stark, warning as to how horrid and insufferable the extremism of javaScript can get

You can't open links in new tabs. Sometimes you can "like", other times app that loaded sits still and unresponsive like a corpse. The most annoying part has to be absence of urls, so you can't reference anything. You can't even share posts ffs

Funny enough, this used to have an edge over the restrictive mobile app eg you could reuse profile pictures. You could share specific photos out of a set, etc. Now, it's painfully broken. It doesn't even compensate for it with passable ui. That too, looks amateurish. The only thing you can do on it now is scroll

I wonder whether this has gotten here yet but it knocked me out. I don't write in trap English but I'm a sucker for memes. Imagine how bored he must have been to start documenting legacy code without the urge to refactor. Just "vibing"

Write and Schedule tasks that siphon stipends from my "esteemed customers" wallets into personal coffers. Call that con jobs

Android studio gradle nightmares, cli not picking active jdk, intellij maven horrorshow, vscode being the nexus of perdition itself. When I'm dead and gone, scatter my ashes over sublime text. NEVER encountered a headache, ever. The setting for autosave is one forum visit away. 1000s of utilities at my fingertips, with shortcuts, not silly plugins. Neither hangs nor fusses irrespective of how many windows, projects, tabs I've got open. Gargantuan code real estate despite having a file panel and file preview. The only guys who got monokai right. Can open random editors and fill them with notes without first saving. A more intuitive vcs gui than even github desktop. More lightweight to download than an beep.ogg. Never lags cuz it wants to be powered by a wind turbine. It's free. Literally all the sorrows that terrorise my dev in its peers, all gone

Yes, it's not "integrated" to my de, in the sense that its intellisense is a glorified autocomplete for existing tokens. I guess, tradeoffs must be made. If you know the language well enough not to grope handheld by the ide, or in dynamic typed languages where red, squiggly lines will not bring your software down to its knees, it should be head and shoulders above those conartistes

Enterprise edition una

I just listened to the devops at my new place recite a strategy that I recognised to be git flow. I surprisingly wasn't traumatised or suffer the ptsd I have at the sound or sight of SLACK and Microsoft teams, despite using them roughly within the same era

For some reason, the instructions for git flow now sound straightforward:

Pull from staging. Checkout to a fresh branch on your local. Push there. Once approved, merge to staging or send a pull request to staging

But slack and teams are an indication that the gig/position is going to hit the rocks soonest. Has happened more than once, it just makes me sick now. The beep of their notifications, their ui, their stupid rules and regulations why it doesn't work on the browser but want me to install their dumb apps on my phone (even if you use desktop mode)

Is there a hidden joke in the fact that stand up meetings/daily stand-ups share the same word root with stand up comedy? It would seem the creators of that pointless activity thought it naughty/mischievous, if not a humorous giveaway that those gatherings are more for fun, entertainment, a joke, and a platform for product managers to not feel left out from the development process

I would batter this nigga if I could

My database migrations are failing after setting a 3 character max length on an integer field with default value 200. I attempt to investigate why and after numerous back and forth, this dude reveals 200 is in fact greater than 998

That time you would have used to test that code in postman, bravely muster the werewithal to write automated tests instead. It's a onetime investment that keeps malfunction in check until code is altered

I acknowledge the fact that it's not always possible. You may have gotten thrown in headfirst into unfamiliar territory ie tech stack, or inherit a monolith where no tests were pioneered. Or you may be strongly constrained for time. But in events that you can, it's worthwhile

Whether automated or manual, Testing your work the least professional thing to do before handover. Might as well swallow the bitter pill of avoiding the gui shortcut, and write those certifications once and get it over with

My preference is to write a boilerplate that gets generated each time I create a new module/resource management classes. Another strategy is to write them immediately after completing implementation of each endpoint/user story/feature, even if they're not run immediately. That way, they don't pile up in the end

Or you could try the tdd that everyone else cherishes. Whatever works for you, the end justifies the means

The most comprehensive software is powered by spaghetti code. I've just realised that if it's old/matured, it was almost nearly impossible for the code to be coherent or neat. No design patterns. A lengthy trail of ACLs and conditionals reading from a util/helper static method that would make javaScript callback hell's head spin and green with envy

These massive, ready-made software overbloated with features plastered in seem built in a hurry to churn out functionality to make stakeholder and client happy in the shortest amount of time. The authors are hailed as 10x devs. But to you, the maintainer, they are Tetanus that make you crave to rip your eyes out of their sockets

I'm completely cooked, brothers. I chanced on an office where the boss has a strong eye for visually appealing female staff. My employment there caused me to mistake myself to have gamed the hot chic ignoring my dms system, at least now I and a handful of them work together, they'll have an excuse to talk to me. Boy, was I DEAD WRONG. It makes no difference either way, I am quite simply not him. It doesn't matter whether corporate labour gives me a helping hand or I go hunting (and missing) online. None of them will be caught dead responding to me except when under formal obligation

The only other place I can see them in person is during my hour long commutes. Strike a conversation, they are only interested in me incurring expenses on their account or replying chats reluctantly. Owari da, ladies and gentlemen 💔

Those modular monolith treatises, articles and videos presenting it as the less complex cousin of microservices with same benefits, I think it was all snake oil. They sold us dreams

Yes, it's more compact to house all components pertaining to an entity under one package. But it turns out all the hoops we jumped to hide them behind an interface, it's an overkill not necessarily the game Changer it was made out to be

I say this because one controller almost suffices for managing a resource. So does its associated service class. It can grow to 1k/1.5k lines at best. But never enough to be managed by multiple people and balloon into "a service". The idea was that these things are big enough to gain full attention. But the chances are slim

As long as you aren't dumping all your logic into your controllers, you're home and dry

Was surprised to stumble on somewhere I wrote,

"Doesn't matter whether they love it or not. It must be finished, either way "

I felt like crying. It's not dated so I don't know when, but it should be early 2023. I'd been working on suphle for two years with neither assistance nor guarantee that it'll turn out great. I noted that after running out of juice to energise myself till the finish line. I strived to finish it and launched to the php community in September /October 2023, with it reaching box office bomb acclaim

BUT I did keep to my pact with my younger self. The uncertainty was insufficient to hold me back. I know suphle was not trash because even as recent as last week, I saw a method "onErrorResume", in spring webflux that provides developers with an API for gracefully handling runtime errors. Suphle is ahead of its time cuz I had this built-in without ever seeing it elsewhere

I saw parallels with nestjs too when I used it last year. They just never gave it the opportunity to see light of day. The story would have been more complete but finishing it is enough for me. At least I tried. It wasn't abandoned and we aren't now talking about pending features and how I'd never make out time to work on them or dream of how great it would have been if the world got its hands on it. Or how I'm holding myself back. We know all those details now

I inherited a nextjs project from an unknown guy and am fangirling the codebase

But the deeper I familiarise myself with it, the more the cracks begin to appear:

1) The dude Is incapable of grasping the basics of DRY concept. He actually setup a ton of stuff I may have done poorly if I'd started working straight out of the docs, so I feel like I owe him a shower of praise. I guess being new to nextjs makes it look more impressive than it actually is. He was paid off, yet getting the credit seems unearned to me. I'm just afraid reaching out to him might turn around to bite me in the ass
***

I had the above in my drafts, contemplating sending him a token to show some appreciation for unknowingly showing me the ropes. I was going to find him on LinkedIn using his commit names. But after doing everything I've done, undergoing the anxiety and severe pressure I faced at the hands of the project owners, I'm not sharing a farthing with anybody

Yes, I may not have known about zustand and persist middleware. Yes, he did all the ui. Yes, he created the base components and fancy wrappers around form and button html elements. For those, I'm grateful

But the amount of refactoring I had to do to, for an opportunity to implement my own target features, I'd say I can lay as much claim to the project as he does.

Side note #1: I have some newfound respect for front end devs. We used to discriminate against them for doing just css but that was only relevant in the jquery days. Now, they have to use cryptic css frameworks (sass, less, tailwind), they have to learn esoteric syntax of some js framework and write controllers/components as the case may be. They have to (the worst part), bind this data to an API, which would never make sense to me coming from a php ssr-natural world

Back rewarding the guy, some of the challenges I came back from were:

1) Next server outages: I still don't know the workaround this. The app terminates, browser giving an error about using up memory. I have to wait for about 10 minutes before I can access the app again

2) spring Webflux authentication not hydrating: I was unexpectedly asked to work on the back end too, where I got tortured with this horrifying condition. The most poorly documented framework for the Web has no upto date guide on how to implement jwt security measures. I opened a question on stackoverflow. A day later, both my question and the helpful answer got downvoted

3) Zustand not retrieving any data from localstorage once page reloads, until I miraculously stumbled on a hack: there's a config callback for reading state after rehydration or thereabout. So I interact with the state there. That's the only way content clearly in localstorage can get transmuted into dynamic format accessible by the code

4) Mongo database suddenly disconnecting: for no apparent reason, this bailed. Accessible on compass. This was even when I realised it was responsible for front end requests not going through. Eventually created a new database and requests surprisingly began connecting again. Thankfully, my laravel background taught me about seeders so I had them on standby from the onset. Wasn't difficult to just port to a fresh database after confirming the first one was inaccessible to the app

After this painful odyssey and the time constraints, threats of moving forward with someone else, I deserve every dime they deem me worthy of and more

Chatgpt and WhatsApp LLMs replaced the time I spend on Google, combing stackoverflow, articles, forum suggestions and documentation. Which makes sense since those primary constitute their software development training model

Its interactivity is like personally iterating with those authors in real time, yet the experimentation I do remains the same. We still do the hairpulling, catfighting, back and forth, tantrums and clawing each other's eyes out when things go awry. I'm mostly the one doing all these when it's completely useless and worse than a mental retarded thing, missing whole points, regurgitating same solutions you told it are dud

More irritating cases are times it withholds information due to ethical reasons. I get redfaced livid and cuss it out. My message gets scrubbed out for violating community policy. Days when its sympathetic, it apologises for my frustration, other days it just retorts with more venom that the umpire supervising our exchange promptly erases

Prompt engineering is probably the ubiquitous language javaScript aspired to be, and may be the future of software development

Disclaimer: This joke will be lost in translation but I can't help but make it

In my country, you can use the phrase "it's not beans" to describe something difficult eg "that ielts exam no be beans". Given my recent woes with spring boot, I can also say "spring webflux no be beans". But it's funny to me because the framework calls objects bound to the container "beans" so it's a nerdy, don't leave me joke

It's shockingly bad, Jesus 😣

https://stackoverflow.com/questions...

I know I'm just whining atp instead of moving on something else. For lack of anything else, I blame capitalism for limiting my options. I would never subject myself to this torture of my own volition. Yet, you have to wonder how a joke like this. Even a routing library developed over a code kata or aboard a flight would at least, include a regex capturing possibility of trailing slashes. How would one ever imagine that all clients of this api have to strictly either end their url with slashes, otherwise they get slammed with a 404

Unbelievable

I fucking hate spring boot. I can go unwind and nobody would hear this but boy, does it suck. Every single thing about it is a pita. I spend 98% of time I should have used for feature implementation in JAVA, struggling and battling MUNDANE functionality of the framework that ought to be nobrainers

Today started out with a project I inherited. I don't even know whether to blame its original author but he installed a couple of funny libraries for logging. The spring app doesn't build yet gradle build completes successfully. No errors are logged to the terminal, just reams and bundles of json. WHY IS THE APP NOT BUILDING??? You want me wrangling json through that pinhole console window?

I struggle with the yml settings, none works. Eventually get rid of the package (hint, it wasn't the slf4j one). I'm able to debug app not starting now, but now live reload doesn't work

I copy configs from a previous project where it worked into this. Nope, doesn't budge. Eventually enable an ide setting but now server restarts twice after file changes. The implication is that request argument annotation no longer works! So the server just restarts and has amnesia about argument type resolution

I've been sitting here for hours, without implementing a single new feature. Everything is a painstaking, avoidable aggravation VS the "framework". Never seen anything as horrendous. No line of java code yet. I just want to send a request, retrieve parameters and verify live reload is "up and running". You'd think something as low level as this shouldn't take more than two minutes. Alas, welcome to the incredible world of spring development

A few days back, I was battling to setup a spring app the old fashioned way. By that, I mean the way I'm used to securing routes in laravel and indicating model relationships. For the most part, I'd gotten used to the authentication config more than my first experience with it

But the jpa/hibernate relationship mess? Honestly, it's insane. If I can only access the relationship if I let them be defined eagerly (which stupidly breaks due to circular dependencies during deserialization btw), what's the point even bothering to define them there? Might as well pretend the relationship doesn't exist and strictly use IDs on belongsTo. That's it. At the time, it felt like Very sick, amateurish stuff but I'm calmer now so it's just disappointing. How come the framework is so popular??

They haven't figured out migrations, lazy and eager load, hydrating models while evading the circular dependency trap, etc. These seem so rudimentary in eloquent, I don't even have to think about it

Those jsfiddle/codepen snippets on stackoverflow back in the day used to replicate the same traumatic effect as the threat on injection at the hospital when I was a child

I Used to scribble my thoughts on paper. It's haphazard yet handy. And even though I can't make corrections without crossing out or drawing arrows to transfer the reader to continuation of the thought on another page, I have this liberty to express myself and glance at a panoramic view before putting them in their final resting place –soft copy

Maybe my thought process became more efficient but I no longer need to flesh things out with ink. Database designs, implementation logic. Everything goes to a special file I create on every project for odds and ends

Until today

I have something to think about. I will miss connecting the dots if they appear in fancy fonts. I need to gradually build upon each outline, pursuing it in an exploratory manner until its possibilities are exhausted. I will draw a conclusion from their character arcs

For some reason, I see parallels between this scenario and sql vs nosql. This is one of those extreme cases where structured data storage is not sufficient. I sincerely doubt nosql should be used as a main database, but instead an intermediary for an aggregator to treat each row/record as a unique blob, extract necessary information into a sql for the actual system to work with

Sql is more sane and recommended for when you know the exact end goal but need help arriving there. Today, I'm confused and need to weigh options. I need to actually cross things out, not press the back button. It's a bit of a stretch but if this were data, it feels like what nosql would excel at

I was tasked with reviving this mobile app purchased off the shelf. Initially, I was impressed with what I was seeing while perusing the codebase. I'm used to editing laravel projects written by handpicked amateurs. So this felt like a breath of fresh air. Coupled with the fact that I'd recently enquired on this very platform whether anyone has chanced upon an impressive code. All is going well, until

I start finding the multi layers of abstraction and indirection cryptic and obfuscatory; and that is coming from an idealist like me who advocates for "clean" patterns such as event emission. I wonder whether it would have helped if the emission or events were typed for easy listener tracking, instead of a black hole like vm.notifyListeners() (DOESN'T EVEN HAVE AN EVENT NAME!)

With time, I become disgusted by the tons of custom elements with so many parents

My take on production level user of the view model pattern: amazing in theory

One of the architectural decisions made on this project that had me foaming in the mouth, pulling my hair and cursing out the author's generations, past, present and future: can you believe these guys are APPENDING IMAGE DOMAINS TO THE RESOURCE? Ie the domain names are tightly coupled to the images and dictated by the api, instead of the client

If this isn't bad enough, the field names of returned entities/models don't exist on the database, of course because the stupid laravel framework abets this sort of madness by combining eloquent "scopes, attributes, and appends". A trifecta of horrors.

I eventual scaled through the horrors, but not without losing my admiration for the team behind it. App has returned to the shelves, because my company lost patience with my resuscitating it. They have the regular api authentication in place, but that's not good enough. They just had to integrate firebase as well, just because. Meanwhile, this isn't documented anywhere. I stumbled into it during my scuffle with app setup, gradle ish. Eventually got banned by firebase for "sending unusual requests". My company's last straw

Left the office pissed and frustrated by the bug that Stumped me. For some context, I've only ran to stackoverflow 3 times between now and 2022. I was making my way home, feeling crushed and downcast, when it suddenly occurred to me that this might be one of those times to seek refuge and succor on SO

Taking my chances with an answer being ready by the time I get home, I branched into area one shopping complex by 730, whipped out my system and started narrating my ordeal, buyers and merchants wondering whether I was closing a multi billion naira deal that couldn't wait or whether I was plain possessed

About half an hour later, I was done. There was no answer but I was instantly covered with the sense of calmness I imagine Christians have after casting all their burdens on their god. I certainly felt lighter, even though it's likely nobody would ever respond. Cuz I've been returning to answer most of my questions days later when I eventually figure it out

Yet, it's comforting putting something overwhelming out there, hoping it crosses paths with someone smarter or with sharper eyes to spot what I'm doing wrongly

I think I've asked this before. Just cropped up again cuz I'm pushed to do some stuff in nextjs

I Wonder how much longer before js framework devs realise they've been reverse engineering the browser this whole time, that the current browser spec was outdated since the dawn of Web fidelity and real time applications

I wonder whether there are some guys who have seen this and are already cooking in the background. The browser still treats the Internet like front end and back end, whereas with the way apps are going (eg deprecation of the front/back end roles), it seems apparent the browser needs to scale up by fading whatever js is now

I'm seeing "use server", which was one of php's infamous atrocities back in the day (lack of separation of concerns, everything in index.php). It's shocking how those who ridicule that language let this fly, but that's probably a separate thread. Point is, a bunch of these stuff done by front end frameworks seem like boilerplate but the syntax is far different from what I remember javaScript to be. I only vaguely recollect and understand what I'm reading

Why not merge all the cryptic syntaxes struggling to achieve bare minimal expectations, into advanced markup language controlled by dom attributes? Overhaul and Rethink client - server communication to fit modern standard. Someone needs to step out of the box and take a good look at the rat race. I find our lives would be made much simpler if api integration into client side behaviour wasn't a separate thing altogether

You have all these funny hoops and precarious bridges to cross. The reality is what we're fighting to overcome is the manner the architecture is setup. We need a Google/meta/amazon/apple to step in with a new browser since it's not a weekend gig and might need their reach to catch on with mainstream users. Sadly, they're the same guys rolling out new js frameworks

I actively job hunted for close to a year without success. Now I have two offers in addition to my existing position, and that, without even having to apply for either. Knowing I can't combine all three, I've turned one down cuz it offers the least compensation for the most work but the guy is insisting he "wants my skin in the game". I know he's not stupid and obviously knows nobody else would be sympathetic to such peanuts

But it's not as though my life took a dramatic turnaround after months of turmoil. All three opportunities are still within the same meagre region, albeit with minor improvements. I do NOT feel grateful because the circumstance of one of the new offers is such that I'm still tied to my old buddies apron strings. Not only did I stagnate but I've got them paying my salary now. They rub it in by telling me I might get a car in two years time if I join them now, and how many properties they've acquired in our time apart

It sucks how little headway I've made in their absence, and how much harder I have to work to have any hope of earning close to their monthly wages

If Google was created in this criminal ai era, we would have been getting charged tokens and credits for each search, map distance covered or words translated

Has anyone ever resumed at a new place and was impressed by the code inherited from their predecessor? If yes, did you see any need to communicate this information to the admin or the superiors he left behind?

For as long as I delved into code quality, I've taken great pride in my work and have been enthusiastic to show it off to anyone who cares to listen. I'm morbidly afraid of a colleague berating my work over something I didn't do correctly or don't know. But none of those I've worked with have that kind of time for pedagogy. The only thing I've witnessed them care about is how much your code breaks, to what extent your endpoints break, etc

Does this make code quality practically an overrated metric? All your fancy oop patterns and clever algorithms or business logic basically goes unnoticed. The business cares about output and your colleagues are more concerned about implementing their deliverables.

Is this just my experience or a more general situation of things?

All your web applications are just UIs/headful clients redesigning or repurposing phpmyadmin and atlas