A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

Gets me every time

Reading other's code be like...

I really wish I had known this before. Check this out guys. You can type a unix command and find out what each options mean. Rather than man paging the commands this is a easier way to do it :)

Great guide 🙌🏼😅

Schrödinger's

What's your favorite command line text editor and why is it Vim?

Marriage is basically deploying your relationship to production.

When you've been working on a problem for hours and realize you just got super excited because you got DIFFERENT error message.

Sysadmins life

IOS SUCKS!! SWIFT SUCKS !! OBJECTIVE-C SUCKS!! SUCK MY DICK APPLE YOU PIECE OF SHIT !! Why did you have to make the language sooo counter intuitive, and so different from the popular languages you pain in the ass piece of shit, Why can't I throw exceptions from a constructor of a class?? Why do I have to use a fucking struct to just throw exceptions?? Can't class constructions fail you peice of shit?? huh? GOD DAMN IOS MAGGOT DEVELOPERS IF I EVER RUN INTO THOSE FUCKERS IM GONNA FUCKING RAPE EM BURN THEM ALIVE AND HAVE THEM FOR DINNER

The truth has been spoken

me today at work

Knock knock

Being honest which excuses have you used?

Just taking the temperature - how many people would be interested in a devRant podcast? We'd probably start with it being every other week.

It would feature things like inside devRant updates, guest interviews, rant readings, and anything else fun we could think of.

Any thoughts?

They see me coding,
They hating,
Reviewing and tryna catch me writing dirty.

I just wrote more than 140 char in a tweet, inspect the element and turn Enable = True on Tweet button.

The response was epic.

Made this sign for the office a while back. Though you guys might appreciate it!

I really dont understand the hate for Java, people specially showing on devRant. Java is such a beautiful language. Im ready to take on the negatives if Java loses. Java lovers can put ++ and hater can hit --. Let's see the results at the end of the week.

The people in my office love these MX Blue's and I really don't know why. Any pointers?

Every brown field project I work on suffers from this.

I'm so confident

New favorite mug...

Do you ever spend hours helping someone with a programming problem, trying to teach them and develop their skills, but at the back of you mind you're thinking, "no amount of help is going to save you from being a fucking cretin"?

For all the Java jokes I see here and people bashing the language, are there any Java devs here? If you are a Java dev, do you enjoy it?

Deployed to ~/

When you're tired of googling your errors

Client: We want to onboard people with sign-up wizard just like (Massive Industry Leader) so remove the sign-up process from the app.

1 week of development later...

Client: We need to take photos of their information, but we think its easier to take photos on the phone so once they sign-up link then to the phone.
Me: How will they get the apps if it not in the app stores?
Client: Get the apps approved for the app store! duh!

2 weeks later... 4 failed app submissions..

Client: Would it be easier if we just add the sign-up on the app?
Me: Yes... like it was 3 weeks ago?
Client: Yes! Why did we remove it?
Me: You did in an effort to be more like (Major Industry Leader)
Client: ....but we're nothing like them! Change it back!
Me: >•<!!!

I have to fire my client...

Success of the developers