Straight in dem feels

Girl: we need to talk

Me: OK

Girl: you seem to have more time for your computer than me. I want to know how important I am to you.

Me: You are the number 1 in my life.

Girl: *smiles and hugs me*

Me: (thinking)...Just that I start counting from 0

He's making a list
He's testing it twice
SELECT * FROM users WHERE behavior="nice"
SQL-clause is coming
To town.

Credit to @leeflower on Twitter

"Everyone Can Code!!" - but not everyone should!

An interesting paradox

"When your computer overheats, why does it freeze..."

Look who found a friend!

My company just fired 20 people, and the next day instuted a program so salaried employees have to clock in and out. Of course not to effect our pay, just to keep their paranoid asses breathing down our necks. Also, no clocking in remotely so all the work I do from home won't be taken into account. Fucking micromanaging, ball-licking, scum-fuck, MBA, morons couldn't run a company if their lives depended on it. When will these soul-less, suit-wearing, shit-scarffers learn that treating your employees with respect and valueing actual work over bullshit metrics, is a better business strategy than treating them like fucking sheep to the slaughter. Fml, I gotta find a new job...

My first child's name will be Sudo, then I can say:
"sudo clean you room"

I accidentally sent my bachelor thesis to the 3D-printer. It printed a big peace of shit.

Got a job with EA
Went down like this during the interview

Hiring Manager: your second part of your resume seems to be missing?
Me: second part is $20
Hiring Manager: Welcome on board

Today I learned: typing "man ascii" into the terminal on Linux will print out the ascii table.
Guess I don't need to go online to find it anymore

😒.

how to improve UX

A devops engineer in its natural habitat

Don't forget the WHERE in the DELETE FROM.

:)) finally a good answer

Welcome to the cloud

Knock, knock.
Race condition.
Who’s there.

When one of those "Your windows has been infected, click here to remove virus now" ads slips through the adblocker while I'm on my Linux

To all new devs:
- Your language of choice is fine.
- There is no superior way to indent, yours is fine.
- Your IDE is fine.
- Your OS is fine.

Unless you work in my team, of course.

General advice: If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.

What does a CS grad do after a line of cocaine?
\n

"The server is flooded!"

"With requests? DDoS?"

"No."

When I see windows rant...

!rant
Hello world, i've just found this awesome community a few days ago and I cant stop reading.

Anyway, I have a burning question:
Do devRant devs rant on devRant?

/bin/cat

#Which party are you?
- [ ] Republican Party
- [ ] Democratic Party
- [x] LAN Party

Hey everyone - just a note on rants about politics: we've had a long-standing policy not to really allow any of them. So if you post one and see it quickly disappear from the feed, that's why.

We've gathered a lot of feedback on this and Tim and I both agree that Facebook is ridden with posts about politics and one of the more refreshing aspects of devRant is we've kept it free of that. It's also an aspect of Facebook that many people I've talked to really hate.

Thank you, and feel free to let me know if you have any questions.

When you prove its a hardware probelm

This Fibonacci joke is as bad as the last two you heard combined.