#2 when working with idiots or spaghetti

#1 becomes an architecture problem and you'll need to own the code because if someone lesser touches it you'll have problems. but it's a nice fancy race car vroom vroom

it's what I'm good at so I guess it's what I'm stuck with

I'm not even good at it anymore, hahahaha. maybe I will again though

I feel like people kind of ruin hobbies for me though. I don't know what's up with that or how to fix it. it's like I got too much black and white thinking when people make things shitty

I guess senior guy needs to loosen up?

I mean if my suffering is at least entertainment I can have that going for me

ended up downloading a bunch of sci Fi TV shows based on books and as long as I'm watching them I don't feel terrible so gonna be doing that

it could also not be the antipsychotics. after encephalitis, 6 months or so after, people get depression apparently. feels like my brain is booting back on but just hates itself as it does it

everything familiar sucks but novel things are good. I think the clingy is me just trying to get out of my own head. so gonna try to stay out of my head and engage with novel things to get some brain stimulation in there which seems to lift the depression at least until I stop

my emotions still fluctuate wildly. it's like I don't even know myself anymore

yeah but I don't know how to build anything on my own

separate the weak from the chaffing

@CaptainRant no the AI gave you sass actually hahaha

the AI makes things unnecessarily complicated btw

and instead today I came to the conclusion that asking for help has only gotten me exploited by opportunistic parties into bullshit they wanted and wasn't for me

it's probably a good trait

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if things aren't documented I would start a repository of documentation. would annoy me. I can't remember things even on my own and extensively use obsidian for notes for my own hardwares and softwares

make a wiki of all knowledge base. github has a wiki and I used that when I worked

I did get fired once maybe for this reason. I was pinning things in slack to document them for devs after me and my team lead didn't seem to appreciate me documenting her pigeonhole probably. with Google docs she would delete my comments but on slack she couldn't so that was maybe my mistake not picking up on that sentiment of hers until we got into design documents and not just environment setups. you'd think I'd have been appreciated smh

@12bitfloat yeah turns out refcell it handles fine by itself

but I still needed to make my own serializer because hashmaps with keyed enums don't convert to json. so you convert them to vecs with tuples

oh nevermind seems it was the rc they were wrapped in previously

excellent

but still. apparently you're not supposed to use them

@Lensflare I haven't added new music in years though. I want novelty

bash tho

@antigermanist love is the answer not managing someone dispassionately lol

@antigermanist EU offers me code drones for the war with Russia jobs in rust sometimes

I have experience automating pvp machines so kinda tempted even though I'd be killing my own genes 😵‍💫

@antigermanist there are words. they're just flavoured by scream. I scream, you scream, for ice cream

it's good to have fun

though it's not as pretty or readable

actually I'm an idiot

I can just use an anonymous function to handle each record

the inner state matters with mine

@antigermanist she's a screamer. enjoy the flavour. you married it!

actually it works in wasm

urghh do I wanna thouughh

@12bitfloat well this will have to go into wasm

@antigermanist then say "oh I love you honey, you're so quirky" and suck it up

@blindXfish that is what I wanted the generator for though

a method that does a for loop and I wanted to take the for loop out because it would've been cleaner. but alas

@blindXfish state machines with nameless states!

now you're really making me want generators!

@antigermanist yeah just listen to her lmao

I like being thrown in

theoretical doesn't do it for me

I got to get my hands dirty to get any expertise. I think it's ok to expect expertise as well, because it sure beats telling someone "you can't hack it". it offers hope and you are allowed to actually engage until expertise. whereas someone just telling you no means they bar you from developing said expertise... well how do you expect me to get good at it then?! I guess nobody would be! it's a self-sabotaging mindset

I mean everyone always is trying to cover for their mass incompetence

it's the human condition. animal condition. living organism condition

I also try to cover for my incompetence 😭

I've met far more toxic people

I think it makes sense when someone does work for free that they may not want to engage with the project all smiles all the time

I think respect goes two ways. people have different personalities. they're not coming after you. which is how I've experienced toxic

you can fork it and take over from them if you wish. the option is always there

I would prefer that over a fake happy smiley atmosphere where people secretly do passive aggressive things because it's "not allowed" in the culture. now that gets actually toxic

you need to allow people some level of individual personality even if you may not like their personality. otherwise the actually toxic people will thrive -- because they already have the skills to hide themselves, if you make everyone hide themselves they will win the game because they've had the most experience in hiding and pretending to be team players while sabotaging people, projects, etc