@D-4got10-01 lol no

the girl got mad at me for doing it

the guy we remained friends for years. I ended up dumping him after 3 months because we ended up never talking

i don't like shaders

@D-4got10-01 ah, and here I theorized polish people are made in the fires of mordor

@whimsical pfft trolling is def a public service

@D-4got10-01 they sound quite responsible lol

@D-4got10-01 ikr I wondered if it's romantic. the director I worked with before; he wasn't a bad looking guy. maybe she saw him treating me well & wanted to put a wedge in that. I did wonder about that

thing is they were both Indian. I really think people should accept racism & it will lead to more world peace... like there's no reason for her to think that Id want to date an Indian guy. even though he was very good looking & a solid partner. he was also married. I helped him plan his honeymoon first time we worked together

but he didn't hit on me or has any interest in me I'm 100% sure & I wouldn't ever have any interest in him. my genetics likes white guys because I'm white. it still surprises me we don't count that as racist. but come on. it's at least accepted...

idiots. idiots everywhere though. nobody thinks about anything. they just react irrationally and emotionally all the time. I'm the weirdo that writes too much!

... she was ALSO married, but she didn't seem ethical

@Lensflare people retroactively pretend they were joking to avoid rejection. you only have rejection for me so why would I want to hide myself so I can maintain acceptance, if I have no acceptance to begin with? I clearly was not moved by the rejection... so trying to con acceptance out of you would not be a motivation for me

nor do social sanctions work on me. I don't know if you are capable of noticing. I actually act _against_ social sanctions. as soon as you reveal that you socially sanction something, I do more of that thing and every time I do it in an "excited" manner. I'm literally making a joke of you. trolling you. do you get it? you lose your mind and I laugh. which actually does make you funny to me! (not of your own volition though, which is why that's a funny joke statement prior, EXAGGERATED EXCITEMENT)

easy way to troll me is to socially sanction me. I'll always react with reactance. you'd be playing on my psychological weakness and know me so well 🥺, for once lol

@Lensflare emoticons are definitely super autistic. why do you think everyone cringes when they're used lol

it's like how when you explain a joke it can't be funny anymore (sort of)

emotions only matter when they're subtle and accidentally displayed. otherwise it's just perception management, marketing, etc

---

I don't think everyone should see my tone shift in text. I just told you 2/3rd of people are not text-capable despite experience. perhaps you had a question here and instead went with an embarrassing assumption? 🤷

I said nothing about finding you funny or your sense of humour. I wanna volunteer whether I find you funny or not for clarity's sake but you don't have the mental capability to understand it anyway lol

why would I "not want to deal with what you say"? what did you even say? all you said was your opinion. why would I take your opinion so seriously that it would hurt me and I would do "psychological denial because it would hurt too much" as you're implying

@CaptainRant toxic workplaces could be perfectly fun

but I find the issue is the "teachers"

as a kid if I was outside school & someone was a shit I can play the game. but in school the teachers want you to talk to them instead of defending yourself. thing is, if you talk to them you lose, & if you defend yourself you lose

if management didnt defend the toxic people it would be fine. but the problem is management will literally defend them & "side with them". if there wasnt management there wouldnt be this problem

I guess the issue is I never learned how to subvert authority. authority is always a laughably bad judge of character, too. to be honest I dont even think theyre trying to judge. they just hate you for bringing anything up. ok so then should I defend myself? wilder yet is management is blaming me for... someone else taking things out on me? I didnt even retaliate. but they kept acting like I was "asking for it". wtf. yeah cuz if youre mistreated it's "for a reason". gross

@Lensflare to help your autism

if the "tone" of a person suddenly shifts, it means they're joking. they sound rational one minute and then it seems like they're acting like a different person a second later (ei, frogs gay)

shouting is also a good indicator. shouting or excessive excitement is used for dramatic effect. in text it's capitalizing words or adding ! at the end of sentences

it's ok though I encounter people even IRL who can't read these signals... granted they were literally always autistic

2/3rd of people can't read tone from text conversations though, even in our modern era of primarily texting

im trying to fix my sleeping schedule. I have such severe delayed phase sleep. when they put me on those psych meds my sleep magically fixed itself & became a normal person's. never in my entire life have I ever woken up or reacted even the slightest way to the sun. it was so effortless

was thinking about taking those pills again, since the sleep pattern lasted for 8 months after I stopped them. but they gave me different pills & then i actually looked into the mechanisms & it seems it's necessary for the pills to make me depressed for me to sleep that way. not worth the price

so now Im trying other ways to sleep like a normal person... sleep under 7 hours a day to create more sleep pressure, took an hour walk this morning. eating tons of food as soon as I wake up apparently should do it too. urgh

problem with delayed sleep isnt so much the schedule but cuz peak cognitive ability is before I have to sleep, so I cant start til it's late and I have to stop right away to sleep

@Lensflare it's humour, you german

I'm dating a german and he's basically a comedian, every room he enters he gets everyone to laugh through literally an improv of random fun and I literally don't even know how he does it, AND HE THINKS I HAVE A GREAT SENSE OF HUMOUR but I'm so fascinated how the hell does he know to be so funny. I don't find what he's joking about to be funny, and I got no clue why people find him so funny. he thinks I'm hilarious though, WHICH IS JUST HOW DOES ANY OF THIS WORK THEN

actually my most favourite comedian on youtube is also german

so idk man I feel like calling you german to excuse your lack of humour can't be accurate

@Lensflare ye totally that's it cuz when I "suddenly didn't show up" I afterwards gained myth-like status in the company since people actually bothered to look at my work then

and the company sought me out years later giving me x3 the salary while pandering like schoolgirls to me during the hire

ofc then I got landed underneath a dysfunctional lead dev who got upset at me for reasons she couldn't ever communicate, and management was too lazy and incompetent to bother once again

the CEO memed I was perfect before I left, but ofc nobody fixes what isn't broken you know what I mean. if you're having a great time maybe you're quite good at milking the "I'm broken and suck at my job so it's passive aggressive behaviour therefore you should actually give me a raise" game, which is actually how the field operates because they follow the SCIENCE religion and the SCIENCE of occupational psychology says to do this, nvm actually knowing your employees to any degree

rude of u tho

@whimsical ah I guess in the typical "model" sense she's beautiful but to me she looks like an alien lol

looking like that and working in marketing, and the manipulative way she talks, is a pretty consistent genetic niche of her lineage I guess

@SidTheITGuy your shirt is still on, why are you pretending you're a satisfying entertainer here when you should full well know the feedback eesh. are you even listening. if you wanna win big you gotta play the game

why did I make messes of my personal work and not my job work

oh yeah i thought I'd be paid more than minimum wage and somebody would care about how good I was instead of entirely ignoring everything I did til I had "suddenly didn't show up" (hint, it was not sudden but fully communicated with multiple people, though they weren't taking me seriously)

silly me

SSL error on images

open the avatar in a new tab and accept the proceed SSL. fixed

@Lensflare good principles of programming is AI's overcommenting so look I can be a shitty person too

you don't strike me as "genuinely" wanting to learn anything, you just like to utilize weaponized stupidity

yeah she's just so emotionally manipulative. she knows what she's doing

wonder if she's working for somebody. this one was a little more sus

hahahaaha i have never seen such an accurate ad before

oh my god how is this the ad woman they used for this

IF YOU USE EMPATHY WHAT DO YOU READ

oh i strangely don't like her

even though I liked the topic of the first video of hers I saw... there's just something really annoying about her

... the intro clip reminds me of whitney webb on jimmy dore mentioning how wexler (in epstein files) had basically bought the government of ohio and how it's all rigged and messed up there, basically company town sucking the life out of the citizens. she had all the receipts for it. this girl did not go that deeply in your linked video

and actually I guess that's one of the things that annoys me about her. when I saw that first video I saw by her, I liked the topic, but when i came away... I did not actually learn anything

also just the way she talks rubs me wrong. why is she so slow. it's like fake empathy

@Lensflare oh is that why I wanted to disagree with you saying good principles of programming don't magically make large codebases not complex-issued

consistent design choices make complex codebases fine. doesn't matter if those design choices are good principles or bad. they just have to be consistent so they end up predictable. with a big complex codebase that can get hard to do though

this guy is AI or something. this joke's been reposted like 100 times, and his first post similarly made no human sense

thanks at least someone cares

@whimsical those floating houses scare me

surprised they even listen in the first place

@whimsical I mean Disney and comic book fans are definitely perpetual children

@foractx777 don't you have any friends though

makes no sense to collaborate with someone you know nothing about

dating or not you still need to flirt

it's like doing a craiglist ad for starting a business. like what are you doing lol. been years since someone wasn't trying to scam someone else on craiglist

I am just monumentally upset by this I don't get back to him for days. because I already did every single thing, and even more. So I just end up quitting / not renewing the contract because just wtf man. I'm overqualified for my own supreme raise and I'm still viewed as shit despite it, seriously?

anyway later I run into a co worker at a metro station, and he's super surprised and stressed / relieved to see me. Seems like nobody told him what happened to me i guess. which is weird to me. Because I am not the company, and it was up to the company if they were going to accept the new raise contract or not. I figured if you were a responsible company you would communicate such things internally, but evidently not. Maybe he thought I got fired. I didn't think our friendship was that close for him to be THAT stressed out by me leaving so I thought it was a little creepy at the time