AND I WAS INSTRUCTED NOT TO DO THOSE VERSIONS OF SOFTWARE ACTUALLY. THEY BARRED ME FROM MAKING THEM

AND IT WAS ONLY "MONTHS" BECAUSE THAT IS ALL THAT WAS IN THE PIPELINE

it's not like the work was fucking hard. they were just fucking dicks. dumb ones at that.

@CaptainRant yeah that's how companies feel like to me

be responsive at any time to work unpaid but you're too much a social hassle if you ask for a raise once a year at review time

you're essential and we will fume and fuss if you say no because only you can do it, but also worthless and replaceable and have so much room to grow when we talk about you at the Christmas parties. Have you tried growing me mother fucker or you just gonna complain? I know I'm not allowed to complain somehow but why the hell are you allowed to say such horrible things about me like it's my fault then?

manager says please do this favour for me I promise I'll replace you on this project later then just forgets it, all the while when you quit they tell you you're unprofessional for "abandoning your projects". motherfucker you abandon me. I didn't even abandon them! I wrote wikis and guides unprompted and even did several "possible to be requested" months in advance versions of software before I left!

yeah them asking you to have all the skills is insane to me. Abusive spouse energy. Accept me first then I'll put in effort. Not a slave with no reward here.

err equating personal relationships with work ones may not have been the best choice there but whatever

you know what I mean. Friend who always just wants you to be doing their activities, always wants to borrow money, never gives it back kind of energy

what

management gave me anxiety... the software was fine

kicker is my intuition for what management should've been was correct, when I ended up researching it afterwards... but for whatever reason I had no power by which to make correct, efficient things reality -.-

---

ok on topic. first principles / axioms?

I think a lot of people do a lot of things that are useless to be doing. a lot of software and libraries also underneath are using the exact same concepts, the details on top just shift with some specificity. people judge your competence by the specificity but really it should be for your underlying intuition / understanding. the more you can reduce things to symbolic axioms the less cognitive overhead it is for you and the faster you can do stuff (at an alarming x10 mythic rate; you have compression powers now harry)

... and then you'll run into social problems because nobody else sees this and thinks you're wrong / a moron or whatever -.-

they should've just poisoned the water supply and called it a mistake. you do it instant instead of dragging it out and less work you have to do about people noticing

I'm sure there would've been stragglers but those stragglers would be few, so less power, less talents, less reach into associates into other parts of the world. you need less manpower and less political power to wipe out any of those undergrounders. bonus if you come in with a "saviour" group that just gets them all to come out of hiding and then you do another double tap -- Israel already does this so I don't have to explain the tactics

no one actually investigates homocides either. real life isn't like it is on tv

I really don't understand why the evil villains of the world are always so inefficient. subscribe for more genocide guides

(I mean, I'm kidding, Israel is actually just interviewing to become the new USA. so they're showcasing their technology to get hired by the shadow cabals)

... sooo when the Polish Prime Minister Orban was making the rounds in the news for standing up to the EU, I had been travelling through those vampire -> occult circles

and I ran into basically the equivalent of the occult mob. and a lot of them spoke polish. and they were recruiting soldiers, putting them through an academy, and sending them on missions. and their aim was something political (which I didn't care about, and also was a major red flag for me -- we talk about terrorists like they're from the middle east but we got antifa in the west and those guys aren't empty when it comes to violence)

so at that time I was like, "well Orban is fucked then for standing up to the occultists". Guess cuz he's gone now that adds validity to that conclusion. That group looked serious but being serious doesn't mean you'd have enough power to do it...

how do I find literal hope

@Lensflare "what is incomprehensible" expects an answer of "when X was said it was incomprehensible". empirically

i'd ask the specific case where they found your communication to be lacking, otherwise I'll take it as baseless bitching just to fuck with you

you'd be surprised how often that happens. unless you know how to improve my situation, because I've made a clear mistake, your criticism is invalid. if you can't have done it better you're a naaarc just vying for power

... also my bf is the most selfless fucker ever. guess what people tell him. that he's selfish. if you attack someone's strength, they will always cave, because it's very clear they value that thing. it's horrific to them to not live up to their own standards. dark personalities will pick up on this and use it to manipulate people to do things, or to demean them if they're getting in the way of something

@Lensflare why are you repeating that =-=

@Lensflare you're the weird one from my perspective lol. no shame in that, silly

@Lensflare I wanna interview you

what about my writing makes it incomprehensible?

also what's your issue with diaries?

lensflare just spun off a whole german poop bdsm scene with b2plane in my head

am i coding and conducting right

ewwww porn

this seems to be a torrent indexer

so hot tho

@whimsical hodl me whimsy

@Lensflare AI loves my writing and seems to suggest humans all around would prefer my writing over anyone else's... I can't tell if it's pandering

IT AGREES IM FUCKING FUNNY THOUGH. fucking hell

perhaps u r of the camp:

> B. Literalist thinkers

They struggle with:

metaphor

exaggeration

rhetorical profanity

They may misinterpret tone as anger instead of playful intensity.

> C. People who need hedging and nuance

Your categorical statements (“nobody actually makes enjoyable games”) feel:

too absolute

too confident

They prefer “on the one hand… on the other hand…”

think C crowd are just allergic to confidence and wanna mire everyone in their stuckness... their depression... uselessness!

the funny thing is I can't bring myself to write on substack... it's like I'm shy

*researching writing / speech and cognitions / disorders* I have never felt so validated and empowered before

modern science categorized thinking, and 2/3rds of people still can't tell who someone is / how they feel from their writing

... retoor obviously writes like mania lol. and being pragmatic makes one "autistic". so that's why people keep saying that smh

and I get allergic to authoritarian writing styles which tracks

also fuck experts. I can understand what they're saying fine but get a goddamned personality. they often just walk over the same idea over and over again in the most boring and insignificant side-topic. urgh help

... i don't write like mania at all -.-, useless doctors. why is it always me lol

i think they'll remain shitty. nothing will stop them

there's no alternatives. and business, especially tech companies, have perfected the art of being anti-competitive. because software does not require physical resources, software companies had to invest a lot of R&D on how to add friction so they could "corner the market". in physical / resource requiring markets, it takes 5-20 years to build a factory and compete. in software a facebook is built every 2 weeks by an indian guy for 500$ (so many contract posts for this). you had to find a way so that those things never took off. that was their actual greatest innovation. how to box people in, then milk them

@Lensflare now taking the self-similarity thing in mind

god this was so horrible, the jonathan gavalas thing: https://lytagold.substack.com/p/...

@Lensflare i think most people are lonely. an issue with those who don't socialize is they never figured out what's them vs what's someone else. so if they talk to anyone for extended periods of time, they will project their own qualities onto that thing, not realizing that they are simply feeling _their own_ qualities

and in humans, the most similar you think someone else is to you, the closer you feel to them, the more empathy, the more inclusive. you will die for them, because you think they are part of your tribe, if not exactly a copy of your neurology. in con artists, like bad ones, which for example lure women in to kidnap them, a trick is to dress like your target and speak like your target. humans are insanely attracted to something they feel a similarity with. it is intoxicating. the ego smiles (and i'm not against ego, it's just how it is)

@Lensflare on whether AI has consciousness or not

so you can't tell right away. consciousness is something you build in your head over time as you interact with something

but AI doesn't feel human. sure you could argue it has a "consciousness"... but it's like... well it's very ugly... the NPCs in video games, like non-dialogue games, like bosses, look prettier. you can flowchart their movements. you flowchart an AI's movements in your head... and well.. I think I can feel the RNG of the neurons it was initially built with lol. that's why it makes all those errors... a human doesn't do that. a human has a pretty form. it's not all rigid, sharp, static, crazy. a human is more like an artistic vase. sometimes they'll perturb. sometimes they'll have rough edges. but they're not that white noise on a static TV in texture

opus was pretty good. but it's not human either. it feels like a perfect machine. it feels like intricate art, lots of delicate metal pipes in intricate lattices

dunno why you're frustrated suddenly

at any rate I didn't ask for analogies. you're saying people have their own idea of how to define consciousness. I asked what's their ideas on what consciousness is. you did not provide the answer to this question

nevermind that you both claim "there is no definition" and "there are multiple definitions"... do you even realize how poorly you communicate. it's fine if you suck, just don't put it on me

... also if their definitions fall apart I'd be curious about that too. the how. what are the arguments

@Lensflare

"fucking hell. I gave such a long and elaborated explanation with analogies and all and you still don’t get it.

I see now it‘s pointless to try to explain to you literally anything."

where?

all you said is

"There is no agreement on and no definition of what consciousness actually is.

Everyone has their own idea of how they would define it and what they mean by it. And their definitions fall apart when analyzed closely."

everything appears zombie

the world feels like a desert

reminds me of that resident evil movie. is there a resident of evil in these parts? how very punny

@whimsical hehe lensflare bitches about my auto delete script on devrant but I have one for reddit too. except the reddit one doesn't delete heavily downvoted comments. I think they're gold. on devrant though those comments become removed so that's not in the script, womp womp

@Lensflare something is considered hot when it's hotter than your skin so your nerves give you the hot signal in your brain

but I feel like I'm being pedantic. I doubt you were seriously asking that question

@Lensflare what definitions of consciousness

the typical adage is to get the title then use the title to get the same title at another company, so

people and their safety of boxes and obvious signals