Yo Mamma ....

My job is so f**king unbelievable.

I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless.
The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on make-up.
She is extremely self-centred and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself.
She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet.
Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10.
I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts.
I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead.
In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work.
He probably hasn't been sober any time in the last ten years, and he's only 22.
He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big f**king dog to work.
Every f**king day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke.
Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing.
Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonald's and Burger King, every single f**king day.

Anyway, I drive these dicks around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.

The difference between Front End and Back End simplified!

Never underestimate the end user

40 commits updating the readme.md. I don't feel bad about it

Fake it til you make it...

Please DevRant ! Give me the power to finish this code before tomorrow! Coffees are not enough.

nicely demonstrated!

True......

I'm working with a 70-year old database administrator. Beat that ranters!

#3am #realization #truth_hurts

This question must be from my PM :|

"It's compiling"

A couple of weeks ago I posted about me making my own reclaimed desk, after a long process of sanding and oiling constantly here is the finished product and I couldn't be happier

Just got this amazing gift for my newborn from the guys at work!

Deploy to live be like:

Every time I see this picture here on devRant I think of my annoying ass for a co-worker.
Not only does he refuse to listen to me and whines all the time, but when I show him a solution he copies my work right to the last semicolon. And proclaims himself to be God for "coming up with the solution".
Hubris much?

Race to git push -u origin master

You're a great coder only if you can deliberately write bad code that works but no one can understand.

*Thug life*

There we go

Where is "this" pointing to??? 😦

Relabel ftw!

Me when i found a bug ..

So high on ideas, so low on motivation and energy to build them. 😑

Two years ago I said good riddance and go fucking die to everything Microsoft and I haven't looked back since.

I can work completely on my Mac. Life is now stress free.

A programmer has born!

Finally closing dozens of stack overflow tabs upon completion of a project

These shoes are just my type

(source: http://redd.it/4ombox )

Me when I close all my issues in record time