I was the first developer in my company. 5 years and 10 developers later...

source: https://bit.ly/2zWJrjN

Me: Can you make me some meatballs?

Engineer: No, what are you talking about?

Me: I thought you were a chef.

Engineer: I'm not a chef, what made you think that?

Me: I was looking at your code and I haven't seen that much spaghetti since Olive Garden ran the endless pasta special. I was just wanting some meatballs to go with it.

in morning ...

SELECT *
FROM some_fucking_40_mil_records_view
where rownum < 6;

Still crying about the slow internet connection ...

Writes something to post...

*after viewing it million times in editor...*

Me: I can do it better...

How am I gonna get the devrant's stickers, t-shirts? It's too expensive if u convert to INR and I don't have much ++ either....

It sucks that you need to transition to other roles.

Started as front-end dev, now I have to write PL/SQL code. Which I don't like and not confident as NodeJS, Vue, React, Angular4, Java, etc.

I Vue so much but I don't React 😂

Others: I can speak English, Spanish, Chinese, Russian, etc...

Me: I can speak Gujarati, Hindi, English, Javascript, Php, Python, Java, XML, Rust, ReasonML, etc...