There’s a junior on my team, who has an ego problem.

Within 6-8 months, they have not progressed much, up to the point they still struggle with language and framework syntax.

Yet, they want to get the credit for doing big and important tasks, the ones they have no clue at all how to execute.

Our team tried to break more the tasks and tickets almost to the point of a tutorial. Junior got upset and complained that they did not want the tasks to be broken for them.

If we give space, tasks take forever to get completed. If we try to pair, Junior does everything in their power to cut the meeting short and again take forever to complete anything.

If we prioritize our own tasks, Junior complains that nobody pairs/assist them.

Took one for the team and started to work on finding ways to get this wonderful person to learn. Junior does not learn. In fact, almost feels like things enter from one ear and leave from the other instantly. Despite being repeated multiple times. Chewed. Presented in all sorts of way. You name it, I’ve tried.

Yesterday was the last drop. They fucking rolled their eyes while was explaining something.

This person is dead for me and I will make my personal crusade to not go out of my tasks to help them.

Thanks for coming to my TED rant.

Data Engineering cycle of hell:

1) Receive an "beyond urgent" request for a "quick and easy" "one time only" data need.

2) Do it fast using spaghetti code and manual platforms and methods.

3) Go do something else for a time period, until receiving the same request again accompanied by some excuse about "why we need it again just this once"

4) Repeat step 3 until this "only once" process is required to prevent the sun from collapsing into a black hole

5) Repeat steps 1 to 4 until it is impossible to maintain the clusterfuck of hundreds of "quick and simple" processes

6) Require time for refactoring just as a formality, managers will NEVER try to be more efficient if it means that they cannot respond to the latest request (it is called "Panic-Driven Development" or "Crappy Diem" principle)

7) GTFO and let the company collapse onto the next Data Engineering Atlas who happens to wander under the clusterfuck. May his pain end quickly.

I'm going to quit my job without a backup plan*. Wish me luck.

* but with solid savings

HTTP response code cheat sheet
(From /r/Programmer humor)

I went to Paris for my first interview (that was 1989) for a job of Unix kernel developer. All dressed up. I step out of the elevator and see a young punk with scruffy hair and different colour shoes. I reckon he must be the pizza delivery guy. I ask him "dude, can you please point me to the CEO's office for interview". He said "sure, follow me man, I'll show you". We arrive at a desk, he sat down in the big chair and looks at me with a big smile and says "Ok dude, here we are. I am the CEO. Now let's see how good you are!"
I got the job. And 26 years latet, last week, amazing coincidence: I met him again at a trade show in Paris ... with the same coloured shoes. How cool is that!!!

IT admins of devRant, explain my dumbass the following:

Why would an IT department put servers in a VPN without TLS.

They presume they don't need because muh-VPN.

And then they don't want to hand out VPN connections to anyone and force me to use Citrix RDP 🤡

I know there are security reasons, but is there not a better way? Like goteleport.com ?

Asking for a friend (or several)

So because of the sheer number of interviews I’ve been doing I’m starting to get a bit brazen with them since I’ve started to really not give a fuck about most of them and I’ve started to notice patterns in common lines of questioning resulting in this unexpected gem today:

Interviewer: So we always start our devs off on the bottom end of our salary band.

Dev: Either give me the top or I’m not interested.

Interviewer: 😡. But if we start you at the top of the salary band we’ll have nothing to give you later. 🥺.

Dev: No need, I’ll take the money up front. Companies don’t give raises these days anyway, it’s just a carrot to dangle in front of the naive.

Interviewer: 😡. Well if all you care about is money so focussed on money you’ll just leave if a better offer comes around!

Dev: All the more reason to give me the highest number possible to defend against that possibility.

Interviewer: 😡. But there are other devs on the team with similar experience that will be making less than you.

Dev: Sounds like they fell for the negging and guilt tripping you are currently attempting on me in order to save a buck. Salary is not based on your skills or experience anymore, it’s based on your ability to negotiate. Here’s mine.

Interviewer: ………………. I’ll pass you along to the hiring manager.

Dev: ???? wtf

HOW THE FUCK DID THAT ACTUALLY WORK ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME I WAS TRYING TO GET THEM TO HANG UP FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES AND NOW I’M LOOKING AT A 20K RAISE ALL BECAUSE I CONTINUALLY TOLD THEM TO GO FUCK THEMSELVES??? THIS IS ACTUALLY WHAT IT TAKES TO BE TREATED PROPERLY BY A COMPANY???

I'm reading jobs ads for engineers at my current company and laughing. It sounds so serious with the wording they use but in reality, it's a clownhub.

This shows I should not be intimidated by job ads and trust my abilities and have more fucking confidence!

It's obvious that a lot of product managers need to take basic stats classes. Your metrics are pointless and lack direction. 🖕

Class components, although verbose at times, are still far superior than functional components in React. The more I work with React, the more I believe that: Hooks are plain shit.

Am I the only one ?

15+ years in c# / .net dev and I still google "c# string compare ignore case" each time. Its just fucking faster than to remember exact syntax of the "StringComparison.OrdinalIgnoreCase"

OMFG, my upper back is so painfully stiff that I can't even breathe in w/o feeling like two knives are stabbed right between my shoulder blades.

And the weather outside is sooo excellent - first snow this season and it's so white and clean all around. A child inside me already has his mittens and warm boots on and impatiently waiting at the door to get outside to play with the snow.

And I'm supposed to somehow concentrate on work.

i don't know graphql

but the schema.graphql file is over 100 000 lines long and lags intellij

how bad is this?

Found this gem and just wanted to leave it here :-|

If you ever feel useless and incapable, think about Safari‘s devtools.
Holy fuck.

FUCK ANDROID, FUCK SDK AND FUCK GRADLE