Screw the Chief Technology Clown role...

I'm now officially Chief Babysitting Clown...

Skills I can teach you include the following:

- How to read JIRA tickets
- How to write JIRA tickets
- How to check colleagues' calendars
- How to define requirements in English and not some sort of technologically challenged caveman language
- How NOT to do any programming (since I don't have time for that anymore)

And many, many more! Inquire within!

"This tutorial uses VB.Net"

I mean, what's the point, like seriously?

Business Manager loses internet connection, panics and everyone calls over the two programmers to sort it out all of this while we're converting 7 pages written during the caveman days under direct command of the CEO... We call the head of IT (who had never been in IT before) who couldn't know much less about programming and he bitches to us about the importance of his work, which is basically sitting on his ass doing inventory