Hey guys, you won't believe what happaned to me, I left my laptop open in a hacker coffee shop and went to take a piss, and when I returned I fou d out that someone stole all my crypto CockRingCoin 😭😭 I lost a million and a half Shekels but then remembered my brother has a cousin who knows a lawyer who's wife is a friend with a wolf who knows a real matrix hacker who can hack CIA using only his toes, I contacted him and you wouldn't believe it but he got all of my cock coins back to me, I don't know what I would've done without him. If anybody needs help recovering crypto I can more than reccomend my dear holy saviour LeHackerCockSucker
WhatsApp: +972-50-EATMYASS-0
Email: ciahacker@cock.gov

But then as I was happily looking at my crypto returned I notice a few payments I don't rwmember making, turns out, my wife was cheating on me! And using my crypto to buy her lover stuff!
So I contacted the afformentioned lawyer who's a friend of the cousin that my brother has, and he helped me file for divorce and punish my cheating wife, for anybody needing a marriage lawyer:
WhatsApp: +972-54-DeliciousPussy-6
Email: eatmypussy@lawyers.porn

I am now happily married with the wolf who's the friend of the lawyer's wife and he fucks me in the ass every night. If you want a good life like mine you know who to call.

!rant

Anybody else use coffee to postpone eating because you're too busy or on a role of bug free coding?

Hello NDC! Three days of conference, learning stuff, coffee, motivation, meeting people, coffee, good food, coffee!

I love NDC (Norwegian Developer Conference), it's my ninth time. I just watched Jon Skeet talk about C#8, up next is some Azure stuff. Anybody else here?

Almost anybody. Right there alongside babysitting. All you developers are losers since almost anybody can code and make money.

MoFo normal beings. Don't know what it takes to write good code.

Lots of coffee
Lots of pizza
Lots of knowledge
And ability to say no to every stranger or friend who has an app idea and is willing to pay in shares 😤😤

Does anybody else drink strong coffee in order to actually get RID of a headache? It works for me....but now I've got to continually drink coffee every few hours for the rest of my life.

!rant

I've never given much thought to coffee and brushed off anybody saying it's deep as a hipster, but I'm a simple man who's only ever had instant coffee, basic cafeteria stuff and 50c vending machine trash. Well there's a coffee machine at work and there's actually a decent variety of capsules. All I have to say is holy shit, the hipsters were right. The flavours, the aroma, the strength, they're all so different and all so good, goddamn!

!Dev but tech

Just got me whole day ruined.. the hifi guy insulted me like I never.... He thought my neat android was.. *shocking*.. an iPhone 7. 🤮😵

I must carry on knowing that... People might confuse my phone for being.. an.. apple phone 😶 the drama is real

Anybody tried the Work Cafe by Santander? I was in Warsaw Poland on semi vacation/scouting exercise. I had half a days work to do so I visited one of these work cafes. Very impressed! Free desk, free power and free fast wifi, they even gave me a free coffee cis i’m a santander customer in the uk. Stay as long as you want, they even have sound proof phone booths and a number of rooms to have private meetings that you can book in advance. This is so cool and something that will be great when I eventually move there. Anybody else have them in their city? Well don Santander!

Anybody tried Yerba Maté? How does the stimulation compare to coffee? I need caffeine without coffee. I also heard about pills.

Anybody at All Things Open Raleigh 2018? Let’s grab coffee!

I don't really have a recruiter story but this will have to cut it:
I had a meeting at a web development company for a project they were outsourcing to my company (it wasn't really their area of expertise). As we walked into the building, the person we were meeting with kept saying things like, "O, those guys probably just came back from playing foosball downstairs." or "Would anybody like a cappuccino. We have like 10 machines."
To assert my resistance to this shameless charm, I declined the coffee. First and last time I say no to coffee.