First Helpdesk call of the day:

"My PC has been stuck on the same thing for an hour now. Its completely crashed."
"Does pressing ctrl alt delete do anything?"
"Where's that button?"
"Its 3 buttons - ctrl in the bottom left, alt beside the spacebar and delete over near the arrow keys. Press them all at the same time. Does it do anything?"
"No"
"Okay then, you need to manually power off the laptop then."
"How do i do that?"
"Hold down the power button"
"Where's that?"
"....on your laptop?! It's how you turn it on in the mornings?"
*60 seconds go by* "oh i see it. Ok i pressed it! Its Flashing blue now."
"Oh, no, just hold it down until everything goes black."
"The power button?"
"Yes."
"But that would turn off the entire PC?"
"Yes."
"Why do i have to do that?"

God help me if this is how my day is going to be 😢

Trying to install .NET Framwork 3.5 and this message comes up *headdesk*

WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, MICROSOFT!?

Someone at work asking me about whether the controller system for our door security can access the Internet. I'm explaining that the reason they can't access Google on it is that it is on an isolated network for security. They wanted to install some remote desktop software on it that some idiot had recommended.
Then I actually get asked: "If it can't see Google... Maybe can it see Firefox?"
*headdesk*

When you see a try/catch block where the catch simply throws the caught exception:

try { /*stuff*/ } catch (Exception e) { throw e }

*headdesk*

Had to add some affiliate JS with a fallback pixel. Put it between noscript tags since thats what the fallback is meant for.

Affiliate Guy: did you implement the fallback?
Me: Did you turn of javascript?
AG: I've just talked to our developers, they say we can't turn of javascript or something
Me: <headdesk>

Are these people retarded

Some mystery emulator-5580 stopping me running an android project 😬 WHERE DO YOU EVEN COME FROM