Screw clients man, request multiple complicated changes to the payment and authorization model for month on end, not enough time to test and no QA team and then act all surprised when we can't consider 20 possible scenarios for every code change. Suck a dick while you're at it, we have other projects and clients that value quality over money milking customers with bullshit.

I confess, I did a trolling today.

Kinda deployed staging in production today. Nothing happened, but the fact that it stayed there for an hour.

Why so long? Because gitlab would ratelimit the CI would and prevent it from executing for an hour straight and AWS was also a jockster by capping the download of the image to <1MB, so we couldn't even retag it

Gitlab ratelimiting the CI from downloading the code. 🤡

Fucking give me an error message instead of telling me {error: "You can find more details on developer.incompetent-shits.com", success: false}

Optimized a query today. Before it timed out after 10 minutes, now it takes 4.3 seconds. Very proud.

"Ok, so if you want this thing to show up here you need to set this property, ok?"

Client: "Ok, but how about I just don't and complain that it doesn't work?"

I even provided a link to the docs with examples and they had the audacity to ask me trice how to do the basic example. Do you not learn how to read/learn in university or what?

Browser are so bloated. Why does it use so much memory?

*Closes 62 tab*

Seriously why?! Damn you modern software engineers for making everything so bloated.

Slept about 13h and still could have slept more, but now I'm too awake for that

On top of being ignoring the Linux community and the audio problem caused by their sheer incompetence to use WebRTC and Electron in order to support screen sharing, they now just sent me the whole damn thing again over the span of 2 hours.

This is why I won't pay for discord until they get their shit together.

Not to mention the disastrous android app update recently that still has unaddressed that make daily usage a pain...

I haven't felt joy programming for a while now.

My work is just tasks that can be done by a monkey if they understand how the framework works and at home I can't come up with any ideas that are exciting, challenging or useful.

I feel like all my creativeness is leaking dry having to deal with deadlines about implementing this text change with critical^3 priority and other boring shit

Coworker who mostly works from home: "Who took my keyboard?"
Me: "Someone needed it for testing yesterday. It's over there"
Coworker: "Why does it always have to be my stuff when I'm not around"

I have to add an endpoint to integrate an API and I want to vomit when I think about this major security issue they introduce.

What type of prehistoric dumbass thought GET requests with username and password in the query parameters is a good idea to burden your partner with.

Me: *Generates 20 character password with numbers and symbols*
Website: "Please use a stronger password"
Me: "Wot?"

Fuck you off mainland china microdick script kiddies

Curse you users who do that same thing in 2 browser tabs.

"Hey, our client proposed a new feature, can you take a look at it?"

Today I fixed a 3 year old typo

I think you already know by now, but I have to say it. The update of the discord app is utter shit, brought only downgrades to me and they still refuse to fix bug that have been prevalent on their platform for years to force their shiny, new, untested bullshit down your throat

Based on a true story:

Me: Woah, I can't believe you wrote a test for such an edge case, you really take TDD seriously

... 1 minute later

Me: Woah, I can't believe this is the only test for the whole project

So to understand RFC A I need to understand Section X from RFC B which implies that you know RFC C which has been obsoleted by an obsoleted RFC.

I love it

Screw you 3rd party!

Screw you pipeline, it's 8 pm

Working on a subscription feature. The amount of times I've misspelled subscription as SUSbscription is too damn high

Fuck you safari for automatically converting UTF-8 NFD characters to UTF-8 NFC characters. Cost us like an hour debugging!

Nice, more problems!

Bruh, I tried so many times to explain a problem that something I could have done in 2 days stretched over a month.

The point was to give them a chance to learn and get familiar with the programming language we use. This task was supposed to have no have no deadline, but it's been too long, so now there's a deadline and the work so far was so unsatisfactory, that I'm rewriting it myself, despite having 3 upcoming deadlines on top the fact that our best engineer will not be there for the next week, just because someone doesn't have the ability to think themselves, even though receiving higher education, even though I always lend them an ear and personally guide them, going as far as giving them a step by step guide, just to be greeted with a something wrong after days of no asking for help, followed by days where I need to explain <20 lines of code for literal hours in hopes they learn how to think for themselves.

Also, I don't know when to finish a sentence

!dev

FFS, I prepared the email, but didn't send it.
┻━┻︵ \(°□°)/ ︵ ┻━┻

Today I could finally spend some time reviewing the merge requests an intern made (and I occasionally helped).

My god, I want to put it this months amount of work an, put it in a trash, burn it and rewrite it before the fire is gone.

5 small and unrelated issues. The intern used branches with the correct naming scheme, but IT'S A FUCKING STRAIGHT LINE BUILDING ON TOP OF EACHOTHER.

Oh ans also they took the liberty to update the dependencies and the language versions used. There was no issue regarding this. It's the first branch in the line and it was called "update_<dependency>" where they just upped the version numbers of everything and then COMMENT OUT all mentions of <dependency> so that it compiles at the very least.

Now today I spend most of my time reviewing the code by fixing that mess. Thanks to updates I had to update the CI and replace some libraries that are now incompatible. Tomorrow I can finally inspect the shit itself.

On a positive side node, I removed node as a dev dependency and the size of the node modules went down from 128mb to 18mb

Coworker: Do you have a minute?
Dumbass me: Yeah, sure.

... 2h30min later