Details
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Skills.NET, angular, SQL
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LocationMelbourne
Joined devRant on 11/16/2018
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Everyone be like "I started programming at the age of 2 and my first ever spoken words were “for...each”".
We get it, child prodigy.
Don't mind me I'm just salty that I only discovered programming after taking the wrong course at uni which coincidentally had an extraneous Fortran module.16 -
I used to do audits for private companies with a team. Most of them where black box audits and we were allowed to physically manipulate certain machines in and around the building, as long as we could get to them unnoticed.
Usually when doing such jobs, you get a contract signed by the CEO or the head of security stating that if you're caught, and your actions were within the scope of the audit, no legal action will be taken against you.
There was this one time a company hired us to test their badge system, and our main objective was to scrape the data on the smartcards with a skimmer on the scanner at the front of the building.
It's easy to get to as it's outside and almost everyone has to scan their card there in order to enter the building. They used ISO 7816 cards so we didn't even really need specified tools or hardware.
Now, we get assigned this task. Seems easy enough. We receive the "Stay-out-of-jail"-contract signed by the CEO for Company xyz. We head to the address stated on the contract, place the skimmer etc etc all good.
One of our team gets caught fetching the data from the skimmer a week later (it had to be physically removed). Turns out: wrong Building, wrong company. This was a kind of "building park" (don't really know how to say it in English) where all the buildings looked very similar. The only difference between them was the streetnumber, painted on them in big. They gave us the wrong address.
I still have nightmares about this from time to time. In the end, because the collected data was never used and we could somewhat justify our actions because we had that contract and we had the calls and mails with the CEO of xyz. It never came to a lawsuit. We were, and still are pretty sure though that the CEO of xyz himself was very interesed in the data of that other company and sent us out to the wrong building on purpose.
I don't really know what his plan after that would have been though. We don't just give the data to anyone. We show them how they can protect it better and then we erase everything. They don't actually get to see the data.
I quit doing audits some time ago. It's very stressful and I felt like I either had no spare time at all (when having an active assignment) or had nothing but spare time (when not on an assignment). The pay also wasn't that great.
But some people just really are polished turds.4 -
During my readings of Nim I found a technique known as stropping.
This gives devs the ability to use keywords as identifiers.
Example:
var `var` = "fucking why?"
echo(`var`)
Can anyone tell me WHY would someone subject themselves to such confusion notion? Mind you Nim has large features for macro programming and the creation of dsls, i have not gotten far enough to assess this, but what other use could you highly knowledgeable lads and lasses think of?22 -
One shouldn't use 'rm -r' late at night -_- just deleted my entire NAS storage thinking I was in another directory6
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I don't like React Redux. Big and lots of boilerplate code just to get working. I prefer RxJs and Context API.
But between Context and RxJs, I will choose RxJs for global state management4 -
FUCK PRINTERS
WERE ALL PRINTERS DESIGNED BY INCOMPETENT MONKEYS WHO HAVEN'T EVER TOUCHED AN ACTUAL PIECE OF PAPER IN THEIR LIVES?!
WERE THEY PAID SPECIFICALLY TO MAKE SURE THEY WOULD NEVER WORK WHEN YOU NEED THEM TO?!?
IT REALLY SHOULDN'T BE SUCH A FUCKING PAIN TO DO A GODDAMN SIMPLE THING LIKE PRINT A BLACK AND WHITE JPEG!
I'M NOT ASKING FOR MUCH, JUST A FUCKING EVEN HALFWAY FUNCTIONAL MACHINE THAT DOES AS ADVERTISED AND DOESN'T REQUIRE SACRIFICING A GOAT TO CONNECT TO
FUCK ALL PRINTERS EVERYWHERE30 -
I assumed Apache's POI library referred to the XLS spreadsheet as "HSSFSheet" because of some internal acronym I could never be bothered to look up.
I had no idea it actually stands for "Horrible spreadsheet format."7 -
That feel when my solution runs way faster than world average
PS: the puzzle is SAWAYAMA WONDERDISC3 -
New ticket:
Ticket: "I just spoke with-"
Me: "LET ME STOP YOU RIGHT THERE! IM NOT GONNALET YOU FINISH! IS THERE A PROBLEM? THEN HAVE THE PERSON YOU SPOKE WITH / SAW THE FUCKING THING HAPPEN CONTACT ME! ALMOST NEVER IN MY LIFE HAS A GAME OF TELEPHONE EVER DONE ANYTHING BUT FUCKING DRAGGED OUT THE PROBLEM! WIDGET DOESN'T WORK? THING DOESN'T DO A NON SPECIFIED THING? FUCK YOU FOR DROPPING ALL THE INFO I NEED AND SENDING A VAGUE EMAIL!!!"
-ticket set to not gonna do shit until someone who saw the thing gets off their ass and says what is actually happening-1 -
I'm very dependent on my sense of smell. I always smell whatever I eat or drink. Because of some stuff about my brain that my doctor told me and I forgot, this sense is very precise.
It's so precise in fact that in a closed room I can tell whether a woman is on her period or not. But we're blessed and we're also cursed – put any kind of paint, nail polish, rotten food, so-called "car perfume" near me and I have a headache until I get a full night of sleep.
Coronavirus however fucked up that feeling. When it initially disappeared I was panicking because I felt like a cat with his whiskers cut off. Now it's back and it's strong as usual, but it's different.
Now I can't eat chicken. No matter if it's fresh or not, if I smell chicken my brain just fucking nopes out and tries to vomit.
Corona sucks. Stay safe.37 -
in 2017 i published my first website. it was basically a remake of google's translation telephone, because google shut it down. unfortunately, the translation api costs money, so rather than pay, i set up a gscript api endpoint that translates it for me.
apparently when you use gscript, translation is free. this was back when i was 14, which is crazy to think about. -
I guess I can do one of these a day or so. I've collected some novelties over the years.
First up is a Curta mechanical calculator. Before electronic calculators became a thing, these were the best portable calculators in the world. Notably, they were the calculator of choice in rally car sports.
They work by a series of helical gears that act as registers. A series of internal gears and value assignment switches apply an adjustable number of incrementations to those gears, multiplying gears and the tracking gears, once per "grind." The result is output as a number on top of the device. The "clear register" function is lifting the top ring, which releases the reverse lockout on the gears and a clockwise turn on the ring then resets them to their zero state.
They were designed by Curtz Herzstark, partly before WWII and partly while he was imprisoned in a Nazi concentration camp. He had filed a patent for it in 1938, shortly before his family's manufacturey became a weapons factory. During his imprisonment, in addition to nearly starving to death, he completed his plans for manufacturing of his calculator.
It had fun names like the, "pepper grinder," and "math grenade."15 -
SAFARI is the worst WEB Browser known to modern man. WTF happened to it. APPLE has shi.... the BED on this ONE!5
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The debugging duck has been retired and instead has been replaced by the maven meow
(Yeah I just needed an excuse to share a cat pic)7 -
Wasn’t hired once because “we are startup and we don’t like your favorite meme that much”. Yes, this is what happened.
Their company was gone in two months.
They said my favorite meme wasn’t so nice
Their bodies are now food for the mice9 -
I quit my job today.
It was odd and uncomfortable and emotional and I'm gonna miss many of the nice people here but ultimately my boss was like "I always knew a bright mind like yours would only be here temporarily" 🥺😍 I'm starting somewhere cooler soon and I'm so excited!8 -
Need to rant / maybe some advice.
Working remote is hard.
New company, remote on boarding. I feel like my coworkers are robots, and I'm being tossed into the deep end with minimal guidance.
The codebase is so unnecessarily complicated, its impossible to read. I've been trying to figure out how things work for a whole month, still not sure.
My mentor that is supposed to help onboard me is a robot, and answers questions in a somewhat acceptable manner, but it still feels like a lot of "figuring out" is still left for myself.
My other work partner that is also a newbie like myself is also a robot - doesn't talk or ask many questions whenever we have a sync up meeting.
The codebase is huge and feels quite overwhelming, I don't feel like I got a team "with my back", I don't enjoy work as much as I have before, I barely do any coding (mostly reading code and trying to understand how everything is working by setting breakpoints and debugging tests that take foreeeever to run), and some days I'm seriously considering cutting my losses and jumping ship just to save my sanity.
Am I paranoid? Am I just dumb? Should I just suck it up and be happy I have a job? Is this how Remote work is supposed to feel like? Why does it feel like my soul is dying?
Anyone in similar situations, or who can give some insight/advice/etc, I would highly appreciate it.
And this is supposed to be a good company too from the reviews. I don't know how it can be so crappy in reality. Did I make the wrong choice joining? Should I jump ship sooner rather than later? I've only been here about a month or so, and maybe its too soon? Halp!12 -
Had an interesting time these past few days. Had a customer who, when I left for vacay, was complaining that he couldn't get access to our private package registry. Get back, this issue is still active.
We'd granted access to his github enterprise, and for some reason he wasn't getting the activation email. We spent about 22 hours of customer support time on his failing to help himself before he finally escalated to the standard 40 person IT enterprise tantrum/come to jesus meeting.
Long story short, he had somehow ignored repeated attempts (35 email replies to the ticket chain, 4 phone calls) to get him to check his spam folder. In which, as it was revealed to all the hollywood squares in attendance, there were no less than 35 activation emails from github granting him access. Of course, none of this was his fault. And while screensharing his big brain to god and everyone he decides the problem is now actually Microsoft because their office 365 spam email filtered his emails incorrectly. We of course agreed with his big brain, smoothed over his bruised ego and went about our day.
I mean, fair enough, it's kind of dumb that Microsoft ever spam lists github, but still. I was just a fly on the wall, and he burned all his paid support tickets on the issue, so hopefully we won't be dealing with him again this year.
Also, this is an edge case with our new product line, most of our customers are painless.4