Here I present the debian cat

The biggest flaw of devRant is down voting is not as simple as up voting. I need to specify the reason for down vote. And those reasons include repost and offensive. This is redundant as there is already an option to report once you open the post. Either make done voting an one click affair or make up voting two click process. There should be uniformity.

Me: *listening to some random semi-obscure track on spotify, liking it, add it to playlist*

Come home, girlfriend playing the same track. "Yeah I've had that in my playlist for two weeks now". Our accounts are not linked in any way, and I only use Spotify on a PC at work, while my girlfriend only uses it at home.

It might just be coincidence, or us having similar tastes.

But the issue is that it's getting more and more difficult to know whether me and my girl are spiritually linked unique snowflake soulmates who are so perfectly in sync with each other, or whether an algorithm suggestively linked us both that song based on scraped location and behavior data.

And whether it matters. Maybe it matters. I don't know yet.

In twenty years maybe humans will be unsure whether it was a wonderful coincidence bordering on cosmic fate that you ran into your new love, or whether Google purposefully drove you towards the same lunch cafe at a specific time because it calculated that she was the perfect candidate to strengthen your susceptibility to advertisements over the coming decade.

Malicious AI will not come into lives bearing guns.

It will not instantly take all of our jobs and enslave us.

It will just know you better than you know yourself, it will know everyone around you better than you know them, and it will play incredible mind games. It will not be designed with malicious intent, just perfectly execute on top of the malicious systems we already have, and even arise as an emergent property within new systems.

It will rarely be clearly visible, but you will increasingly say to yourself: "That's odd, I was just thinking about that". It will detect depression from a smile, physical attraction from a glance, reliability from patterns in your voice and illness from the bloodflow in your cheeks.

It will not just make our cars autonomous, it will make our lives autonomous. It will protect us, decide for us, keep revenues and human satisfaction in a "balanced maximized" state, it will make everything feel easy, slightly abuse us, and when one of us suddenly crashes at 140 mph into depression, debt or addiction it will prove impossible to know whether the humans or the algorithms were at fault.

I'm incredibly afraid and excited about the coming 10 years.

Can someone explain to me why the fuck I should even care about the fact, that some companies collect, use and sell my data? I'm not famous, I'm not a politician and I'm not a criminal, I think most of us aren't and won't ever be. We aren't important. So what is this whole bullshittery all about? I seriously don't get it and I find it somewhat weird that especially tech guys and IT "experts" in the media constantly just make up these overly creepy scenarios about big unsafe data collecting companies "stealing" your "private" information. Welcome to the internet, now get the fuck over it or just don't be online. It's your choice, not their's.

I honestly think, some of these "security" companies and "experts" are just making this whole thing bigger than it actually is, because it's a damn good selling point. You can tell people that your app is safe and they'll believe you and buy your shit app because they don't understand and don't care what "safe" or "unsafe" means in this context. They just want to be secure against these "evil monster" companies. The same companies, which you portrayed them as "evil" and "unfair" and "mean" and "unrepentant" for over a decade now.

Just stop it now. All your crappy new "secure" messenger apps have failed awesomely. Delete your life now, please. This isn't about net neutrality or safety on the internet. This is all about you, permanently exaggerating about security and permanently training people to be introverted paranoid egoistic shit people so that they buy your elitist bullshit software.

Sorry for my low english skills, but please stop to exist, thank you.

I really appreciate that it's devRant, not dev_rant

anyone with same mental disorder as me ? 😂

If nobody has told you today, your code is looking good ❤️

👈😎👈

Boss: “Do you think you can work on Saturday? We really need the help.”

Me: “Yes, of course.”

Boss: “Great, thank you.”

Me: “I’ll probably be late, though, as public transport is slow on the weekends.”

Boss: “Okay, when do you think you will be at the office?”

Me: “Monday”.

The three most dangerous things in the world are a programmer with a soldering iron, a hardware engineer with a software patch, and a user with an idea 😐

Fucking HR interviews. Fucking "tell me about yourself" and pretending to seem interested in what i have to say while you think about how you did it with a guy behind the dumpster.
For fucks sake, i am a developer, i have spent more time with coding language than human language. I speak more to a rubber duck than to my friends. That's what you want to know about me?
I am here to fix your fucking site that uses flash plugin in 2017 and you want me to tell good things about your company?
Do you want me to tell you the details about your site that i got from whois and that your subscribed domain registration will end in September this year?
You don't know what responsive design is and you dare interview me?
Thanks for wasting my time and telling me shit about your company and how you have offices in germany and china. Well guess what? I dont care. I am busy thinking about some girl... Actually i am thinking about my side project. I dont know why i pretend to be cool?

DevRant rant
Why do I need to provide a reason every time I downvote something?
It is time consuming...

WHHHYYYY?? 😤😲😣😕😨😬😡😫

Accidentally uploading your nudes to Github

!rant
I hate the feeling when you're creating an app then the designers provided you a mockups that aren't intuitive, it makes me lazy to code 😒

!!rant
If you feel an urge to post memes or non-rant-non-dev-relevant images we all have seen already, pls gtfo. And download 9gag or join meme groups on FB.
I think we should stay true to the name of this great app.
I joined this community just 2 weeks ago and really love all these great stories, rants and anecdotes of a dev's daily struggle however I feel more and more annoyed of some thinking this is some kind of haxx0r-meme-giggle-posting-app for posting medium funny stuff.
Thank you, your fellow devRant n00b.

I started attending this IoT class in some computer training school. During my first class, I was early because I had the raspberry pi class earlier in the day. A guy came up to me and started chatting to me, he was bragging about how he created some big projects, how he works in his dad's company which develops IoT products (he codes it). Later on in class he talked about how he hacked his school's server or something and changed his marks. Whenever he brags, he has a tendency to use a deeper voice (which is pretty annoying).

Anyways so I thought he is pretty good and maybe I can learn a thing or two from him. A few class later, I started having my doubts, why? Because he doesn't know how to debug code, he copies the lecturer's code and still copies it wrong, and he doesn't know what variables and constants are. He uses IE and doesn't know about GitHub.

Now he asks me or the guy in front for help in class. He makes the class more fun, it's funny listening to him brag. Love it.

First post.
Ah, finally a place like stack overflow where no one will down vote me!

A dev found a bug I created where I set a SQL parameter name to @OrderID instead of the expected @Order. The standard is @OrderID, there is one stored proc where it's @Order.
Oops...I didn't catch it because the integration test didn't cover that area of the code. My mistake...I should have checked...I take complete responsibility for the screw up.

He let me know by email..
"When refactoring, from now on check the stored procedure parameters, there are a few that don't follow the standard."

I was like "from now on..."? ...wow....bold comment from someone responsible for code that doesn't check for nulls, doesn't log errors, and relies on exceptions for flow control. You wouldn't even have known about the error if I didn't modify your code to log the error (the try..except returned false)

I really wanted to reply ...

"Fixed. From now on, when you come across those easily found bugs, go head and fix it, write a test, and move on. Don't send a condescending email to me, my boss, your boss, all the DBAs, and the entire fracking order processing team. Thanks."

But..I thanked him for finding and letting me know...we're a team..blah blah blah..

Frack..people suck.

So I've always had an inflated opinion of my technical abilities. That is until I started working under this genius senior developer for the last 2 years. He's kept my feet on the ground and reduced my head to a normal size so much. Tomorrow is his last day. Googling *dealing with god complex* right now.

>About to create Helperclass for JSON parsing and writing
>Realises there's the GSON-library by Google
>shamefully and silently like a fart deletes 1 hour of work
>repeatedly bangs head against desktop

So, I needed a package installed on one of our Unix servers. The package manager--which is obsolete garbage--was failing with a message which can only be described as a variant of "Go fuck yourself". A quick Google search didn't help.

3 espressos and an eternity later, I have descended into a manic state. My hair has turned grey and I have started lactating. As a last-ditch effort, I try a new search query on Google, and the first link takes me to a forum with a thread discussing a similar issue. The last post in the thread has a solution which works for me. After fixing the issue, everything in the world feels right and I decide to thank the generous poster, who is like an angel to me at this point.

Guess what? The poster is none other than me. 8 months back, I had created a user account on the forum just to post the solution to a similar issue I had on another server.

I just hate it when a co-worker says "AS LONG AS IT WORKS. It doesn't matter how you code it as long as it outputs what the client/user wants. They don't check how you code it anyway" *facepalm*

We effin' follow standards so that it will be convenient for everybody!

Bad code is still bad code if you don't follow standards even if it works.

I think the best I saw was a co-worker scripted a file so that every time the manager typed the computer would play painful screaming sounds and then thank her when she stopped typing.

I love these wires.

I don't like coffee.

Dentist: Did you follow the advice I gave you in our last sitting ?
Me: Sure did!
Dentist: Great, let's see!
*Inspects teeth*
Dentist: Your teeth look horrible.
Me: I did exactly what you advised me to do!
Dentist: You brushed your teeth twice a day every day?
Me: Twice???
Dentist: Yes, I told you to brush before bed and in the morning!
Me: That's exactly what I did! Sometimes it was hard to fulfill both conditions at the same time, so I had to brush twice, but I managed to do it on the other days!
Dentist: Fucking programmers.

You go to an accountant to file your itemized taxes in a couple of hours, you pay them at least $200.
You go to a lawyer to incorporate your business in 2 days, and you pay at least $800.
You hire a photographer to take pictures of your 4-hours wedding and you pay them at least $1500.
You go to your car dealership to fix something and they charge you about $125 hourly labor rate.
Now, ENLIGHTEN ME, how did you come up with the idea that the web application I will create for your business in 8 weeks (design, code, test, deploy, server administration) should not cost more than $500????!!!!!

How was yours?

I work part-time in a small non-tech company as the only developer/tech-support. The work is fine and I got a own laptop.
But fml my laptop is the slowest in office and should be burned already in the stone age.

Every. Single. Time.

Push APK to device. Runs.

Make code change. Try to run - but device not shown in ADB list.

Only this sequence works, and not every time:
1. Turn off USB debugging on device
2. Turn off debug mode with toggle on device
3. Turn back on debug mode, then toggle USB debugging
4. Wait for prompt, allow debugging from computer.

If I check remember this computer, then I need to add the extra step to revoke authorizations.

Why. WHY Can't I just push to my device while its plugged in more than ONE TIME