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FUCK PEOPLE ON STACKOVERFLOW ANSWERING JAVASCRIPT QUESTIONS WITH FUCKIN JQUERY SOLUTIONS! IF I EVER WANT JQUERY I WILL TELL YA!
NOW GTFO AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!!!15 -
A fellow intern recommended the use of windows server for security and speed reasons.
Few details about the situation: windows server got hacked due to a vulnerability which had no patch released yet and this had happened multiple times that year. Also, the company was migrating everything to Linux (servers).
The senior/lead programmer literally gave him a GTFO face and pointed at the door.
Everyone was giving him the GTFO face by the way, he didn't know how fast he had to get out 🤣8 -
The windows/microsoft fanboy I've ranted about multiple times.
- wouldn't use anything except for windows. Even if required for a project (I would if really needed, have done that a few times already)
- refused to use any framework/language not written by Microsoft
- tried to get other projects to use windows/.net when it wasn't required and it was only linux/php guys (and that fit the projects perfectly)
- ONLY wanted to use Skype and whatsapp. Always bragged about how he had 10gb of Skype history.
- didn't want to use anything related to linus torvalds or open source because 'those are open source and have no business model so they're bad'
And then: he suggested the use of windows server right after one was hacked (windows vuln that wasn't patched yet) which caused the devops guys to want to install a new Linux server for it.
Even the windows sysadmin pointed to the door when he said that and gave him a huge 'GTFO' face cD
Yeah, fuck him.9 -
FOR FUCKS SAKE PEOPLE ! JS AND PYTHON ARE NOT THE BEST LANGUAGES NOR THE ONLY THING YOU SHOULD LEARN. THERE'S NO TOOL OUT THERE THAN CAN FIX EVERYTHING.
WTF HAPPENED TO THIS INDUSTRY IT'S AS IF JS AND PYTHON ARE ALL THEY TEACH THESE DAYS ...
ENOUGH ! BE A POLYGLOT OR GTFO (OR YOU CAN SPEAK ONLY 1 LANGUAGE AND STOP FORCING IT WHERE IT DOESN'T BELONG)
now that that's out of my system. bring it on59 -
My interviews to hire a Junior Dev will begin this week. Here's how its gonna go down.
Me: Star Trek or Star Wars?
My Supervisor: WTF? How is that relevant?
Human Resources: Let's see what he says.
Applicant: Battlestar Galactica
Me: Nice. I can deal with that.
Me: Tabs or spaces when indenting your code?
Supervisor: ... ?
Human Resources : ...
Applicant: Spaces.
Me: GTFO you imbecile! Next!27 -
tl;dr I need ideas on how to warn the next dev(s) that the company is a dumpster fire.
------
For the past week (actual time: three days) I've been writing documentation for work, since there isn't any. It's been okay, I guess. Certainly more interesting than anything else I've done at work in months.
I'm up to 10k words / 67kb of markdown, and I think I'm done. I could easily write another 30k words on everything, but I just can't care enough.
However, what I do care about is warning the next dev(s) about how terrible the place is to work, so I want to add little references or hints or other such things to my writing. To complicate that, there's a contractor dev who said he will edit the document to strip out my commentary and make it "friendly" for the next person. (I can kind of see why: I've been quite honest about the situation of everything, and it's pretty dire. If they read it as-is, they might just walk out the door. I certainly would have.) I'm also going to commit it to the repo, and afaik he doesn't have push rights, so he can't force-push and remove it. (and a force-push by someone else, adding my documentation immediately after I leave... that would be pretty fishy, too.)
Anyway, at someone's suggestion, I added a "three envelopes" reference in the access phrase generator section. I also wrote "Promises made outside of ES6 will not resolve" -- in the warning section of a document almost entirely about Rails. (because the boss has broken every single promise he has ever made me.)
What other hints and subtle warnings could I add?
(And hurry: tomorrow is my last day! ;3)16 -
I was on this group on facebook and the guy had a genuine question but I tried to crack a joke and he got really pissed and told me to gtfo. I know I'm an asshole. But I'm a humble asshole.
6 -
1. No more coding on paper! Why can some already write essays on laptops but programmers are stuck with "analog"?
2. No vendor lock-ins! Teach free, cross-platform development, not VB.NET.
3. No more professors stuck in the eighties! If all you know is 6800 assembly, GTFO. I heard NASA was hiring...
4. Enforce code style consistency, proper documentation and even VCS for larger projects
5. Algorithms -> scripting -> programming. Don't quickly explain the basics, then throw students straight into Java.10 -
Decided yesterday night that it was time to leave this joke of a company. Updated my CV, changed my pic on my CV and posted the CV on Monster.
15 phone calls, 4 emails, 3 adds on LinkedIn, 3 planned interviews and this is just the morning.13 -
-When they ask for your current/previous salary in a job interview, tell them that you don't find that relevant or that you don't want to tell. If they insist on you telling your salary, GTFO
- When they are overenthusiasticly telling about all the latest technologies they're using without staying one word about legacy projects, GTFO. It's a trap.
- If you walk trough the developer room(s) and everybody is extremely focused and just programming like a zombie, GTFO.
- If they cannot tell you one single downside of the company, it's probably too good to be true.
That's about everything I can think of at the moment
4 -
Oh boy.
I recently, I switched job for an open source company in Lyon, FR.
They had struggles to find me something to do (still has, tbh), so they sent me to a client of theirs, to help for a biiiiig project that's really old (created in 2001)
The thing was... Horrible. Lots of styles were set via JavaScript without condition, I found 3 different versions of jQuery, at one time they added Object oriented development in a context where they had HTML, JS, (inline) CSS and... PHP of course, inside of one PHP file. The architecture was more "uuuh these files in this directory will be about this functionality".
And it goes on forever. I told them that I hadn't the required level of PHP knowledge to have an excuse to get the fuck out of there, my company didn't like it but it was either that or my mental health.3 -
A few weeks ago I stepped onto the grounds of lovely Canada. Back then - coming from Europe - I was surprised. Free WiFi everywhere without all the bells and whistles of creating an account and such.
Well ... at least I thought so ...
Today I went to a location where they actually charge you for their wireless services - fair enough the coverage area is pretty huge - and provide you with an access coupon. All good my optimistic me told me but once the login page loaded...
There are a lot of things about UX I could rant about but let's put that aside. The coupon came from the office where they KNEW all your contact details but it required you to create an account with all of them again to redeem the coupon.
Not only that but it asked for things like the phone number - obviously asking for a Canadian landline number since hell who uses mobiles anyway with numbers longer than ten characters?! - and even though it had a nice country selection it kept the states field there even when selecting a country that doesn't have states ...
Oh, and on a regular phone screen (which would be the target user for WiFi on a campground I suppose) the input fields for state and zip were occluded by the margins of the input rendering the content invisible.
And if that weren't enough after creating your account they made you watch an ad as if the personal data and the 4$ you paid them wasn't enough for the lousy 400 KB/s you get for 24h ...
Gets better though! After creating the account they display your password to make sure you remembered it ... over a non-secured WiFi network ... and send you an email afterward ... password via unencrypted mail via an unencrypted WIRELESS connection ... not that it protects anything that would matter anyways you can just snoop the MAC of your neighbor and get in that way or for that sake get their password but oh well ...
Gosh, sometimes I just feel the urgent need to find the ones responsible and tell them to GTFO of the IT world ...
Is it just me feeling like this about crappy UI/UX design? Always wondering...2 -
When the last dev wrote code and you dared to read it....switch on a Boolean, what even is your life legacy dev?
2 -
Project manager:
"Ah, we have so many projects. We want to finish all at once. Can you work 1 hour on each project every day?"
Not doing that, gtfo.12 -
My company got another contract to support a research institute. My current contract has shitty leadership that won't back us against our boss (different company, same contract) without proof. The fact that 3 of the 4 of us dread going to work isn't enough?
Anyways. Talking to the other site about transferring. Need to gtfo to a less toxic environment where I won't be made to work fucked up hours with a boss who doesn't like women in tech, and thinks he's something special because he's vegan (but had real leather jackets and bike seats, but that's an entirely different story) and does yoga and plays the guitar.
Meanwhile, he resents his kids and seems to regret getting married. All because he used his military education benefits to pay for their school.11 -
YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKERS!
Are you fucking serious? How it is possible that you, being a fucking teacher in a PRIVATE UNI, AREN'T ABLE TO FUCKING DEPLOY A .NET CORE WEB PAGE EVEN THOUGH I FUCKING WROTE YOU A PDF, LINKED TO MS DOCUMENTATION AND EVEN WENT TO TELL YOU HOW TO DO IT?
You fucking prick, and now you argue to your superiors that we aren't doing our job as expected... seriously? ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID SERIOUS?
I hope you choke on the turkey this christmas, you ignorant incompetent cheap slut... ha, you're not even cheap, because parents are paying THE SCHOOL to provide them with "supposed" better infrastructure, education than a public one, BUT YOU COME TO TELL ME I MUST CODE YOUR ANCIENT PAGE IN FUCKING ASPX WITH DOCUMENTATION DATED 4 YEARS AGO?
Yeez... seriously dude, level up or GTFO.12 -
I just cant fucking believe this bullshit!
THE PRODUCT YOU'RE ASKING FOR NOW ITS NOT THE PRODUCT WE AGREED ON MAKING. ALL THE ADDITIONAL FUNCTIONALITY AND CHANGES YOU WANT TAKE TIME!
I can't believe how rude can people be! We were supposed to stop working in this product MONTHS ago but you keep asking for changes, for additional things and then you yell at us just because we dont have it ready for yesterday?! You got some fucking balls man just fuck off. You have to understand the development process, every change you ask for can have consecuences that make us rewrite a bunch of code and we also need to test everything again and again to make sure it works! Gimme a break!4 -
First day of a week long vacation and this series of emails comes in (no I didn’t reply to any of these)
Random new QA: “Why does this 5 year old functionality behave this way?”
(10 minutes later)
QA: Okay I saw your out of office message but I really need to know why this behaves this way or else I’m opening a defect because I don’t believe it should behave this way.
Internal me: Heh that’s great kid but you didn’t make the requirements.
(Another 10 minutes pass)
QA: Defect opened, please resolve this before Wednesday.
Oh the joys of enterprise development, I guess if it’s a big enough deal they’ll actually forward it on to the people I put in my away message. I’d love to see that defect holding up the release when I get back on Monday.9 -
Have you worked on something impressive and wanted to tell a non-programmer about it?
You start to figure out a way to say it, but then you decide 'nah they will not get it'.
But you still want to talk about it with someone so bad... Its super unsatisfying to not be able to explain this tech shit to the people you like.
If you were a pilot, you could say shit like 'i landed a plane during a storm while eating a burrito' and everyone would be like omg thats amazing.
What do I have to say? I made an auto pilot system for a plane, so that a pilot can land it during storm while eating a fucking burrito.. what's their response?
ehm okay <crickets chirping>
🖕🖕10 -
Data Engineering cycle of hell:
1) Receive an "beyond urgent" request for a "quick and easy" "one time only" data need.
2) Do it fast using spaghetti code and manual platforms and methods.
3) Go do something else for a time period, until receiving the same request again accompanied by some excuse about "why we need it again just this once"
4) Repeat step 3 until this "only once" process is required to prevent the sun from collapsing into a black hole
5) Repeat steps 1 to 4 until it is impossible to maintain the clusterfuck of hundreds of "quick and simple" processes
6) Require time for refactoring just as a formality, managers will NEVER try to be more efficient if it means that they cannot respond to the latest request (it is called "Panic-Driven Development" or "Crappy Diem" principle)
7) GTFO and let the company collapse onto the next Data Engineering Atlas who happens to wander under the clusterfuck. May his pain end quickly.2 -
Dear customer,
You pointed out, that the program is failing due to insuffizient memory.
"Memory" is the RAM in your Laptop.
"Insuffizient" means YOUR FUCKING RAM CANT HOLD THE ENTIRE 2 TB DATABASE!
GTFO and RTFM!
Best regards
me6 -
Applies for Android Internship
Supervisor: Work with this Image Processing Library to "RECOGNIZE" objects from the phones camera.
Me: Wuuuuuh....?
Supervisor: Also it should be in real time and can't use internet.
Me: But that's impossible....
Supervisor: Align your goals with the company's goal. Nothing is impossible......(gets all motivational)
Me: 😩🔫15 -
I just realized something in my work place, I'm the only one beside the intern (lol) on my team who is proficient in english.
I was helping a coworker debug some issues and she couldn't understand the OBVIOUS error message telling her precisely wtf was wrong and the exact line...
I know something for sure... In our area English is basic, learn it or gtfo. I might as well conduct half the interviews in English from now on.4 -
Biggest GTFO moment of the year;
While applying for colleges, I created an account with a username and variant of my usual password (I know, bad move, sorry). I came back to finish the application but had forgotten what variant I had used. So I clicked the forgot password button and got an email with...
MY PASSWORD IN IT!!!!
Plain text password! Just as part of the email! WTF do these people think they are doing?!?!
I immediately changed my password to a random string and deleted my account, so hopefully when someone gets into this database my stuff with be overwritten... stupid programmers...8 -
everyday another damn js library with a godamn benchmark claiming kicking every major library's ass by a factor of 10!
just GTFO dude.
I'm tired of seeing that shit :/10 -
goddammit Microsoft, why do I have to remove your fkking internet explorer icon and store icon after every update! noo I don't want it in my bar. gtfo! leave my settings as they were! How hard can it be? Think: does this fuck up someone s personal settings? if yes , DON'T DO IT.5
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Friend: hey could you help me with buying / fixing xy?
Me: sure no problem, because I can appreciate being needed.
End of story2 -
For the first time I am feeling like.... I hate my job.
Agile and Scrum can be fucked, but at least there is a work methodology. I was hired by a company being run the old school way.
These guys never heard of git??
- Fuck you. We never used git and neither should you.
Client company does not want to give me push/pull access to their gitlab instance??
- Fuck you, you can use our RDP server for that.
Project planning features be damned, they've got email, Teams and videocalls!
Can I develop in peace? Fuck no, I have to give IT support to the guy who hired me.
Our timeline is defined IN A FUCKING WORD DOCUMENT FOR FUCKS SAKE. I can't connect Issues to milestones in a Word doc
Oh, and the customer is running everything on prem. If there is a need to scale up, FUCK ME. I should have specified 20 machines from the get go or gtfo. We're using 2 machines to run 8 different services that are going to be ingesting and computing data.
They want state of the art on a cheapskate.
And I have nothing else lined up at the moment. Although I am soon to renew the contract... This contract binds me with professional responsibility for a project being ran by people who do not give a single fuck about optimizing the work process.3 -
YOU MEAN TO ACTUALLY FKN TELL ME IT TOOK YOU 3 DAYS TO FIGURE OUT AN "QueryFailedError: null value in column "id" violates not-null constraint" ERROR??? GTFO. These fkn "fullstack" consultants man...1
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I don't understand, you pester me to send you an email and stress how it's so important. I send you the email and you don't read it. I remind you about the email days later and you still don't read it. You miss a deliverable because you DIDN'T READ THE FUCKING EMAIL I SENT AND ITS SOMEHOW MY FAULT??!?
Furthermore, you call a meeting after the fact and ask me to read out and explain the contents of the email to you? GTFO you friggin time drain 🖕 -
Fuck this shit.. I don't fucking know shit about using Facebook or Google+... I'm a fucking programmer, just because I work with computers I don't have to know how you're supposed to go about making your fucking Facebook page...damn this gets on my nerves.1
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It's actually right now. I'm looking forward to my interview at another company today.
So sick of getting angrier everyday.1 -
My one coworker wont gtfo his phone. I often go into the bathroom to see him using the urinal looking at his cellphone off to the side... also always uses his phone in meetings even with important stakeholders present. Dude needs to fucking disconnect
-
I have an Android phone. Pixel 2 to be exact, and I love it. Many family members and friends of mine have iPhones. To each their own.
Having said that, I absolutely HAAAATE the stupid iPhone feature that lets users react to text messages. Today all those iPhone users added me to literally 5 different SMS groups (which by themselves are their own sin), chatting up a storm all evening. I already hate group texts, please, leave me alone. But it gets so much worse when my phone blows up with twice as many messages because so-and-so "liked" this message, and so-and-so "laughed" at that message. It sends you their chosen verb alongside the ENTIRE original text AGAIN.
Such a stupid feature, leave Facebook on Facebook, why the hell do text messages need reactions? I don't give a shit that you liked or laughed or loved that so and so said they will be there at 9 o clock.
At least i have the ability to mute notifications for each group otherwise I'd be replying to every group text I get with a trolling big trigger item or something super inappropriate until they stop. Don't want this to continue? Stop group texting me, stop reacting to texts, and don't do it again.12 -
Extract from a quite old recruiter email (excluding the formalities):
Position: junior dev
Workplace: office for first year, can be changed to remote after (salary will be 50% lower if you go remote though) *suspicion levels starts raising*
Payment: 1€ per line of code (empty lines/comments excluded) or page of documentation *alarms start ringing*
Additional info: on high alert for 4 weeks every 6 weeks *wtf is going on*, salary bonus is 10€ per week *I stopped reading here and moved the email directly to the spam folder*6 -
Fuck, they updated the internal move policy in my company from 1 year 9 months to move to another team to be at least in the same team for 2 years.
I hope I can find a way to gtfo faster because I am honestly so tired of this shit, the tasks are getting too repetitive, my boss is useless, spends her time shopping instead of working and being stuck with a bunch of juniors means you only have the internet to learn something new.
I really want to start delving more into PAAS and start working with docker and kubernetes. Oh well, guess we'll have to wait and see.16 -
Nope, too young.
Though some smaller kids than me DID come and ask for advice on how to start learning and I told them that they have an entire internet to learn from, there are guides online, and everything that stands between them and success is their DESIRE to learn computer science. And if they really do want to learn CS - really stick to it along the years and try to get as much head start as they possibly can.
I learned in my limited experience in software development (for the uninitiated, I am 16, started coding at 12), that you must want to learn it DEEP DOWN, because if solving problems is not your cup of tea and you don’t like thinking big, then GTFO lol.6 -
As an exercise lets see how many different ways we can wish devRant Happy Birthday in code. Try not to copy peoples examples, use a different language or different method.
A couple of examples to start the process:
* LOLCODE *
HAI 1.3
LOL VAR R 3
IM IN YR LOOP
VISIBLE "Happy Birthday"!
IZ VAR LIEK 1?
YARLY
VISIBLE "Dear devRant"!
NOWAI
VISIBLE "to you"!
KTHX
NERFZ VAR!!
IZ VAR LIEK 0?
GTFO
KTHX
KTHX
KTHXBYE
* C *
#include <stdio.h>
#define HP "Happy birthday"
#define TY "to you"
#define DD "Dear devRant"
typedef struct HB_t { const char *s; const char *e;} HB;
static const HB hb[] = {{HP,TY}, {{HP,TY}, {{HP,DD}, {{HP,TY}, { NULL, NULL }};
int main(void)
{
const HB *s = hb;
while(s->start) { printf("%s %s", s->s, s->e); }
return 1;
}12 -
I once thought that developing on WordPress was cool and easy. Now I see that it's a total abomination.
No more WordPress job for me. I'm gtfo.
3 -
I remember the first time working with a Windows 2012 R2 server.
Of some reason I couldn't open Windows Powershell as admin and asked another Dev what to do. His response? Try restarting the server.
Can you imagine the look on my face if I told you I only worked on Linux until that point. How can you seriously make a server OS that needs restarting at all? Is it just me or is that just fucking stupid?1 -
I have done something super sacrilegious.
I switched from VIM to VSCode on my Linux box. I got tired of having to constantly configure a tool when I wanted it to GTFO so I could focus on code.
VSCode is the only major tool I couldn't give up from leaving Windows. You get brownie points here Microsoft.
VSCode + VIM plugin + Fira Code + Linux = happiness.
2 -
Recruiter strikes again:
"... looking to hire a Senior Android Engineer to drive their global expansion. This is predominantly a backend role, with some very exciting global projects."9 -
How can an online marketing company work without any web developer? How can they look at their costumers' face and pretend to represent their communication using basic mailchimp and DESIGNING HTML WITH MS OFFICE? Can someone explain me why should anyone think a NEWSLETTER MADE OF FUCKING TABLES works just fine? Why spend money on inadequate software and shitty plans instead of using it for hire a good developer? They don't even understand the fucking mailchimp anyways, why pay for something you don't know how to use and then BLAME OTHERS WHEN STARTS RAINING SHIT BECAUSE OF YOUR DECISIONS?? I got nothing against salesman, and I believe ignorance is not a sin, but when those two elements merge, a fucking stupid raises in glory and I get to work three or four times more than if they just used common sense for once.2
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From my experience you can't really avoid bad companies with 100% success ratio. You can pay attention to the surroundings during an interview, you can research the company online, but in the end whether the company is good or bad is a purely subjective feeling. I think the most important thing is to make sure you don't get too attached to the company either emotionally or legally, so you can just gtfo when you decide it's not right for you.2
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Background: Process issue in the plant that the workers said was a software problem. I’m a Software Dev Manager
Exec: This is broken and it is a software problem. We just noticed it this week.
Me: Couldn’t have been us, relevant code was changed this time last year. Sounds like a process issue.
Exec: Can you give me an exact date it was changed last year?
Me: (Seriously, WTF?... checks git...) It was changed on December 2nd, 2016. Couldn’t have been us.
Exec: Can you detail that change for us?
Me: (GTFO) No, not my problem, stop trying to make it my problem.1 -
Reading over at zerohedge.
And I just wanted to comment on what this one guy posted:
"People that show up on time, dressed to work, not stoned. People that don't stop in the middle of the day to take care of personal matters. People that deliver to the right location. People that don't steal or damage product.
We pay well over the national average for final mile truck drivers. 80% of the ones you get are worthless. The ones that do a good job we reward handsomely to keep them. We have had open reqs for two years now that we can't fill at just about any wage. "
If all the people you hire leave, or no one wants to work for you for any wage, the problem isnt the pool of new hires. The problem is you.
Like a certain fast casual chain that claim they train their employees, and then just toss line cooks on the line and scream at everyone on the line.
Saw it while I was at an interview. Seen it in other
Train your fucking people.
"Good" is now a synonym for "people I dont want the expense of training, and people trained at someone elses expense."
Train your fucking people or gtfo of busines because you have no business being in business otherwise.2 -
I have realized that I'm getting nowhere with my boss with my current attitude.
I want to change strategy, but I find it very hard to bite down my tongue and give up on being logical or the attitude of "be competent, do a good job, or gtfo of my way". Like, it's not my place to fix all the issues, neither am I perfect.
I'm not looking for methods of manipulating him, rather I want to change my own perspective and mindset to something that doesn't make me suffer. At least regarding this one person.4 -
The best motivational comment
I posted a rant in which I mentioned that "few" developers who don't want other to progress and are present to show off at every platform....
Got a comment, which I want to share...
Thanks to @MrCush
Ya, most of them tend to stalk the stack overflow and Arch Linux communities. On stack overflow they tend to refresh their browser nonstop to see who their next victim is on a new question and then spend an abnormal amount of time searching the site for a similar question and then downvote you and report as a duplicate. “Umm ya, the question you linked is similar to mine. I found that one as well but unfortunately it wasn’t in the same environment with the same conditions that I raised and didn’t help me. Oh btw, he posted that back in 2002 and HEY LOOK, he got reported for a duplicate as well. Seems like you reported him as well.”
The issues of arrogance and being unhelpful on that site are so vast that nobody else that registers can get enough points to be able to be allowed to answer someone else’s question so you never get any new blood.
Arch Linux “elites” like to answer your question with a link that you’ve already been to as they always link the same site. “Dude! There’s a wiki for a fucking reason. Did you read this page?”
Yes I did read that page and it was helpful to a degree but since I’m absolutely new to Arch, a lot of the information on the wiki is a bit too descriptive and over my head. Not to mention every paragraph links you to another wiki page which then links you to another and so on that I have no idea where I left off....
“Dude! If you don’t understand everything on the wiki then you shouldn’t be using Arch Linux man! Gtfo scrub.”
Took me a long time to get comfortable with Arch because of these assholes. You got to start somewhere and doing is the best way to learn.
Reading the wiki on how to install Arch now seems so simple to me because I know what to ignore and what is required but back when I first started it was absolutely confusing.
-
the latest recruitard.
so having been unemployed for 14 months, this recruiter shit is infuriating. i think they are the reason for my unemployment.
i just spoke to the biggest idiot ever, she worked for a temp agency called manpower, attempted to solicit a job for the u of a. she was "new and getting used to the technologies in the market" that was her excuse for asking me if java and js were different languages, i mean if you cant understand simple stuff like this, gtfo the industry all you are doing is hurting hard working ppl like me. i cant even get adaquate representation because there is no qualified ppl in charge of delivering me to hiring managers, and you can forget about presenting yourself c level execs dont talk to us plebs we are here for one thing to make them money and get screwed, the last 6 out of 10 jobs i have actually gotten all left me with debit they owed and dissappeared into oblivion.2 -
!rant
Pretty excited today! A buddy of mine wants to try getting into linux, he's mostly done Windows IT Helpdesk and some light Windows SysAdmin work but the company he works for is garbage and he wants/needs a change of pace. He's grabbing himself a raspberry pi 4 model B to use as his learning test bed. I'm grabbing one today or tomorrow so I can help him however I can to try and help get him comfortable with Linux so he can try to escape the hellhole that is his workplace. (I used to work there too, so you can trust me when I say it's fucking shite!)
Gonna start slow and easy and have him get comfortable with the terminal and ssh-ing in using keypairs.
Fuck yeah!!! I'm so excited for him.
He's wanted to get into linux for the last year or so but something at work would always happen to make him comfortable with his job again, like fuckface mcgee would finally get fired. And my dude would be like, "Okay, it's not all bad here, I'll stick it out a bit longer." Then they would just teplace fuckface mcgee with dipshit cockmouth and he'd fall back into a depression about working there. They finally put the final nail in the coffin recently and I think he's really motivated to do whatever he can to GTFO of there this time. -
bitter reflections from a bitter dev on hacktoberfest this year (in the past 2 hours of trying to find issues my IQ has at least halved):
- DefinitelyTyped - used to be my bread and butter to complete hacktoberfest; now, not sure if actual issue, or person just doesn't know how to use typescript (found a multiple such issues that were actually non-issues, the type they were asking for was right there, no pull request needed)
- avoid "issues" on no code / low code tools, these are toxic issues with titles like "I EXPLAIN BUG HERE", then probably not even a bug / more a feature request or clueless clown
- if your entire contributor team has the same character styled profile pic + background, i can't take you seriously; if your identity is so closely tied with what github team you are on... uh, i mean cmon what is this kindergarten? (also love the fact that an anon managed to get themselves mixed in hahahaha they ruined it perfectly!)
- most 'hacktoberfest' issue finders themselves are broken or don't load anything
- people claim issues and then never return YAWN
- the hacktoberfest discord: the projects channel is mostly people promoting their garbage repo WHICH HAS 0 OPEN ISSUES IN THE FIRST PLACE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA and then OTHER people promoting their own portfolio on hacktoberfest???!! 😂😂😂😂 yeah bro i'm gonna help you with your own portfolio site GTFO
from what i've seen, i think i can start working approximately 5 minutes a day and be more successful than these absolute 🎪🤡🤹♂️ devs
sure, there is being a beginner, and there is being a clown salesmen trying to get people to do work for you... i mean wtf is going on
i WANT to help and contribute, but this year its really a struggle to find anything worthwhile to contribute to!
somehow the spark is gone... this might be my last Hacktoberfest... let me just return to my wisky and be in peace
4 -
gsus christ, do you HAVE to break it every Fucking TIME???? Wtf's wrong with you???? Cocky motherfucker "ooh la la la, I'ma break it today cuz I've nothing to do but renaming hi hi hi hi"
Fucking OCD motherfucker go jackoff and GTFO of here2 -
So, started working in a nodejs/react personal project with an old friend. I code in linux mint, my pal always at windows 7 never worked in something different from php. From the very beginning I advised him to move to linux
Me: hey man, the backend is running now, pull the changes and `npm start`
Friend: ok so I need to install dependencies right?
Me: yup, easy peasy lemon squeezy
So after a brief(one week period) until my friend could install visual studio to get some deps installed
Friend: hey I ran `npm start`, it got stuck. backend does not start at all, no output messages, no error, no nothing
Me: FFS, that's why I told you from the start, "use any linux distro for this project" :(
Then for a couple of hours(4) trying to install a distro in his 7 years old laptop...
Me: Ok, let's call it a day, 7 tries to install this thing in your old machine is enough. did you not realize your HDD was really busted? in your 7 years with your laptop? this is BS that's why I could not install linux :|
Friend: I didn't, windows never showed me any problem, maybe windows is better than linux in that matter.
Me: GTFO6 -
I don't understand why people are so preoccupied with new languages and scared to try them out. At least half of the language features are a rehash of the same ideas and the other half are 2-3 ideas. Seriously. I find it distasteful that people in my co are so scared of learning new shit. NEED To GTFO.3
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That moment you’re sitting at a developers conference and some keynote about some lame business plan is given... We all know you came from nothing and became big because of the good work you did. Now, gtfo!
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Some time ago Ex-Boss, who's also a Dev, asks for some opinions about which JS framework we should use in our next project. I gave my 2 cents about react JS and he said no, react won't be any good, we must use Aurelia because it is backed up by Rob etc etc. At that moment I thought: wth is he asking, if he has already made its mind on Aurelia? As at that moment react was getting some hype and I knew the features and advantages, I kept going. Boss, react has shadow DOM. React has this, it has that etc. This discussion ended up with him raising his voice, telling me he is much more experienced than me and telling me to GTFO. That's what I did. And thanks God I did it. I respect other opinions and beliefs but If I'm asked to give my own opinion I will, even if they don't like it.
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incredible how many clowns are out there... saw a guy asking about "blocks" and "plugins" on reddit about gatsby... what is this, 2001 with PHP? GTFO or learn your shit, its clear you are an absolute clown. its 2023, nothing is hard unless you make it hard (deep truth that only the good ones will understand; stubborn idiots will remain stubborn and bitter)
i'm too wasted too put in tags; you already know what they would be
on the bright side, rewatched harry potter 1... damn i gotta reread the books again, fucking classic stuff
inb4 jk rowling haters; you'll never even have a thousandth of her genius you stupid illiterate fucks
i'll die on this hill infinite times like fucking edge of tomorrow3 -
It really grinds my gears when new hires just start adding themselves to every fucking slack channel and then start crapping up the channel history with irrelevant chatter.
Business Analysts and Project Managers do not need to be in #developers sending mock-ups to a UI/UX designer for one team, or posting an xkcd strip you found on the internet because you "got it" and you think you are proving that you are one of us by posting it there. This channel isn't a fucking club, its where ALL developers at this company across all teams share tools and practices for us to maintain consistency and best practices and to improve our craft, or to give a heads-up about vulnerabilities.
There is a specific channel for your role, and your project. You don't need to be everywhere and in every conversation. And for fuck's sake, PLEASE stop @someone adding people to these channels just because you think you saw something in there posted by someone else that they should see. You can just fucking share that message directly with that person, or in another channel.9 -
Note to anyone who is thinking about using Google Inbox:
Don't use that fucking stupid cuntbag of a tool for important email accounts. Even though it uses POP3 as Google states, it just permanently wiped all 2700 emails from the account via IMAP without any reason just after it was setup, so that even all the locally saved emails on all of our devices connected via IMAP were deleted. Go fuck yourself Google.3 -
Report comes in that there is "no purchase confirmation screen" in the app.
Well, yes the hell there is, so I use the test credit card to make a purchase. Sure enough, it works fine on my testing account. Just to be sure, I try a couple other test accounts. Flawless.
"No, try it on *this* account"
I try again on their stupid account. Works fine.
"Well I just tried it in Chrome and it worked, it doesn't work in Firefox"
I was already testing in Firefox...
Wasting my time over a corrupted browser profile.. GTFO, why are you even a tester? -
That moment you need a messaging bus for a part of your application and there is always 1 cheeky dev who will shouts for building it oursevles instead of using of the shelve libraries.... STFU and GTFO
Why do some developers seems to be fine if you copy paste some simple code but are losing it when it comes to using new libraries/services which are designed for exactly your problem?1 -
Best tip for getting unstuck? If it's after your usual leaving time, GO HOME.
So many times I solved the problem right away the next morning. Only wish I followed my own advice more often... -
Let's say you are just diplomed and got hired in a small dev company.
Let's say the company is eventually really boring, and it mainly devs with Drupal (see my profile to get my opinion about this CMS).
Let's say you leave, find a bigass society, they accept your desired pay per month, and tell you that, no, there won't be any Drupal in your future work.
Let's say that you come on monday and the first thing people ask you is to check you Drupal level, because you're going to be needed a in future projects.
What would you do?
This happened to someone who joined us this week, the dude who hired him (and no it's not a recruiter (almost sadly)) sweared him that wouldn't use Drupal, and it's been a week and he did only that. Should he just GTFO?7 -
Check this out: the company that times its Web searches in milliseconds can't retrieve a bunch of rows from their internal database... GTFO.
"Accused of underpaying women, Google says it's too expensive to get wage data."
https://theguardian.com/technology/...1 -
Does sending spam text messages really bring results? Omg, I bought a domain name once without paying for privacy and oh how I regret it. I can't imagine anybody ever being like, "Oh wow, thank you for reaching out to me with that product pitch, that's exactly what I was looking for, please, take my money!"
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When you create a middleware function and title it gtfo // no comments need to explain this function
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The first colleague who was happy to talk FOR HOURS about topics seen as small/irrelevant/would you stop you annoy me/gtfo.
Some heroes don't wear caps! -
Please don't ask another dev what he's doing after he refuses to answer twice... Just gtfo if you see he's busy.
I didn't mean to be harsh but that's how I feel. -
Just got back from NDC and had a ton of fun. Kinda weird with government restrictions going into effect the last day and having to gtfo of an omicron outbreak.
According to their FAQ "all sessions are recorded and will be made public on our YouTube channel approximately one month after the conference."
https://youtube.com/c/...
https://ndcoslo.com/
Definitely nag your employer about going if it's ever on the table.2 -
There is nothing worst than being asked to use a proprietary software.
I literally started coding as a kid so I wouldn't have to learn anyone else's idiotic design, or waste time being limited by the lack of feature, or hit a paywall every time I'm finally about to get shit done.
Use open source industry standards or gtfo.1 -
In my head: Look man, I'm not saying you're lying. I just need examples of these reported failures. Call times, caller IDs, etc. I am trying to track this issue for you, but we've had no failures, and the call samples you provided show that the calls went through. We've tested the calls and they went through. You tested the call with your cell and it went through. Can you please provide examples of failures? That's what I need to help you. I'm not calling you a liar. Oh, and by the way, GO FUCK YOURSELF!
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I know another Apple iPhone post but hear me out on this one. So the new iPhones support fast charging right? Now supposedly/apparently when you buy an iPhone 8 or X it comes with a regular power brick and cable which means you will have to drop another 85$ to actually fast charge your iPhone... like what?
source
https://youtube.com/watch/...1 -
I wonder what they do with this shit
Why do I keep having to repeat this ?
Maybe so they don’t get charged anymore
You know bullets are cheaper
Boom twenty cents
On a lighter note
If there is still a time period where the worst I have to worry about is walking in on a group of guys getting blown by a topless hotel attendant which is not awful at all send me to that and gtfo
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