Developer in a nutshell

I've got 99 problems and all of them are priority one.

https://triplebyte.com/ whoever you are you can thank me later....

Made me laugh

Today I'm 40 years old..
Should i be afraid?
Will i be filtered out?

will i stop getting "pick up" messages from hot girls on linkedin, who's
Only intrested in my mind?

am i too old for this to be my room?

When I'm bored I play developers roulette.

($RANDOM % 6 == 0) && rm -rf / || echo "Click"

I just quit my job for a better one. Damn....

How I've decided to answer the "can you hack" question from here on in...

"Can you show me how to hack this account please?"

"Sure, you'll need a hammer, a blow torch, chloroform, some pliers and couple of bottles of really pure vodka!"

"What the hell?!"

"Oh, it's so much quicker to just extract a password from a person, than it is to break into a system, I'm not exactly trained in inflicting pain on the human body, but I'm sure you'll be able to figure it out through trial and error, good luck!"

Nothing more to say here... 🙈

Without words.

Tree top

Word joker ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Everyone gets a lot of ++ with good programming jokes and I'm sitting here like...

Mindblowing CSS answer from one of our students, yesterday:
```
li{color:blue;}
li{color:red;}
```
=> Final color of <li>?
- Purple!
:-O

Good people do exist after all

WINDOWS USER VS LINUX USER

A Windows User's view on computing

I have the blue screen of death again
You'll never hear me say
I'm happy with my computer
At the end of the day
my operating system
dictates
my choice
in programs i use and the features I've
i have complete control
over nothing
i lose sleep
worrying about getting viruses
and
microsoft patching vulnerabilities in time
i don't have time to think about
some thing better.
i've learned
to live with old software issues
There's no way i'm planning
to change, and
its worth it to me

A Linux User's view on computing
(read this bottom to top)

High coding is much more fun than drunk coding.

Me: I need a Windows PC to test my code on.
Server dude: We don't have any free, but I can setup an old server for you.
Me: 🤔 .. I'll take it!

Been there.

CSS 101: How to check if elements are directly under each other

I'm almost 29 and only have finished high school. I never new what I wanted to do until 7 years ago. Software engineering and development.

It took me a little while an some effort to find a employer who sees my potentials and is willing to invest in me.

Two weeks ago I decided to finally go back to school again (self study). Last week my boss told me he is proud and willing to share the costs.
Today my books arrived.

I am so excited and nervous!! November 5th (also my birthday) will be the first day of school.

Google what is recursion? Or you mean recursion?

W...w...wha...whaaat?!

You know your getting deep in trying to figure out a bug when you start discovering bugs not even reported yet.

When you need to be sure

A trusted-partner of my company obviously opened a dodgy email, as some of my co-workers got emails with a dodgy link from them....

So our Network Admin sent an email to the entire company with a screenshot of the email and a message along the lines of "DO NOT CLICK THE LINK IF YOU'VE RECEIVED THE ORIGINAL EMAIL!"

Company director REPLIES TO ALL and says 'i cant click the link that you sent to us'.
N.A replies directly to him to say its only a screenshot as it could spread a virus.

Director then informs N.A that that he has found the original mail (hurrah!) but the link downloaded an empty .zip file, so he forwarded the file to another director... who also couldn't open.... so they forwarded it to another person who also couldn't open it..... and they in turn forwarded it etc etc.

Currently have 37 power scans running (out of 250 computers) and trying to figure out how the hell these people manage to dress themselves every morning.

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

Just because you're special doesn't mean that you are useful!!

And then there is this beauty...

Devs we be like.....!...thanks to Bots.....Why should we remain single for ever😂😂😂