“Talk is cheap. Show me the code.”
― Linus Torvalds

Frankly if your a dev that doesn't push yourself. I wont take you seriously.

Experience levels range greatly! You have to be mindful of that to.

I push myself with every project looking for better ways to do things

Doesn't mean you can't have fun whilst you do it 😉

WHY THE FUCKING FUCK CAN FUCKING DESIGNERS NOT FUCKING DESIGN TO FUCKING STANDARDS.

Do they have to just piss all over photoshop and expect us developers to turn their insanity into something that doe snot make us fucking cringe.

To top it off its some old ass legecy product bloated up with that useless peice of shit bootstrap, guess they forgot to mention that to the designer too, not that it would of made any difference with this pile of shit he churned out.

I don't get it, why would you put infinite scroll on a site that has useful links in the footer?

A human cell has 75MB of DNA information, a sperm cell has half A human cell has 75MB of DNA of it 37.5MB, a milliliter of semen has 100 million sperm cels, on average, a ejaculation lasts 5 seconds and has 2.24 milliliters of Semen.

That means a man is able to produce: 37.5MB x 100,000, 000 x 2.25/5 = 1.687.500,000.000.000 bytes/sec 1,6875 Terabytes/sec;

That means a ovule is able to recive a dDOS attack of 1,6 terabytes per second and only lets one package pass, making it THE BEST FIREWALL IN THE WORLD

Really True ... :)))

If you give the client a choice of:
- Quick and dirty solution which results in tech debt
- Better solution that would be cheaper in long run

They will always choose the first without fail..

On an average, how many times a day does a dev think about offing themselves while working with azure cloud?

Lets beat Snapchat!

But, How?

Let's buy WhatsApp, Instagram.
Press cmd+C and cmd+V.
Now our apps have new features 🤑🤑

Go fuck yourself Facebook. New WhatsApp is shit!

When you copy code from internet and it leaves the line numbers in. FML

Welcome to 2017:

Facebook = Blue Snapchat
Whatsapp = Green Snapchat
Instagram = AllPossibleColors Snapchat

Ps: First rant **yayy**

So this just happened:

Sarah = best friend (random name)

Sister: Hey, could you help, sarah's phone isn't recognized by her computer anymore.
Me: What phone/pc does she have?
Sister: iPhone/Windows.
Me: Has she checked the drivers?
Sister: *tells to check drivers, feedback:* yes, seems to be fine.
Me: *comes up with 1000 other suggestions*
Sister: *doesn't work every time*
Me: Is there any other information that might be useful in this case?
Sister: Well, she dropped her phone in the water earlier, the phone is hardly responding.
Me: THE WAT? AND YOU DIDN'T THINK THIS WOULD BE WORTH MENTIONING IN THE BEGINNING?!? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

Worst thing about being a programmer? Occasionally having to develop stuff you know nobody will ever use

I just found out that in our old GUI everything is derived from button :/

Table is a button

Background is a button

Icon is a button

:/

Best Valentine's day gift ever ! 😍

That moment when installing arch...need wifi drivers to access internet and need internet to install wifi drivers 😢

Found this twitter today. So true!

Coding nightmare -> the guy who wrote this application I guess wanted job security? At the VERY least to be a pain in the ass to anyone else who touches his code....WHO NAMES THEIR VARIABLES PEOPLE NAMES?!?!? do I know what "Beth" or "Sarah" stand for? ummmm....no 😢

Removing code is better than adding code.

Hahaha.. this is awesome 😂😂

After spilling coffee on my laptop, and giving it in for servicing (luckily completely covered under warranty), I walked in today to find this one arrived today. I needed cheering up, so thanks!

Found in a reddit thread
:'(

Coding with music is bliss

😂😂😂😂

People who fork a repository, and then do nothing with it.

When you spend 3 hours debugging a site's CSS to see why an area isn't showing up...

...only to load it on another computer and find out that the only issue the whole time was that one of the CSS classes tripped an Adblock filter.

"Please disable adblock to support us"

*Me pauses adblock feeling sorry*

Fucking video ad starts playing in the middle of the page/article

Savage....