Rank Best to worst code readability
Mine 6,3,1,4,2,5

Developer superstition, never say something is easy, fast or straightfoward.

It will take weeks to develop, months to test and debug and you will consider change jobs just to stay away of that code

I just change of keyboard, is like learning to walk again

Is Bootstrap still cool?

Managers who don't code

Lifting

Make sleep far easier so I feel rested and I can code better

Modern Web Developer
(To the tune of "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General" from Gilbert and Sullivan's "The Pirates of Penzance")

I am the very model of a modern web developer
I’m quite fluent with JavaScript; An HTML whisperer
My code is clean and elegant, I genuinely innovate
And even know my way around a Promise and async / await

I’m very well acquainted too with matters vector graphical
I understand why SVG coordinates seem magical
And even without Photoshop I elegantly can produce
A mockup or a logo in most any format that you choose

[Chorus]
A mockup or a logo in most any format that you choose
A mockup or a logo in most any format that you choose
A mockup or a logo in most any format that you choose

I'm quite adept at ES6 expressions like destructuring
I know the ins and outs of functional reactive programming
In short, in matters browser-based or Node.js if you prefer
I am the very model of a modern web developer

[Chorus]
He is the very model of a modern web developer

I know our mythic history, the humble start, the browser wars
I know why Douglas Crockford fought the battle over ES4
The World Wide Web Consortium and Ecma International
My knowledge of our legacy is truly supernatural

With LESS and SASS and CSS, designing for mobility
I’ll perfectly apply the right amount of specificity
From custom fonts and parallax to grid and flex and border-box
I know most every tip and trick both common and unorthodox

[Chorus]
He knows most every tip and trick both common and unorthodox
He knows most every tip and trick both common and unorthodox
He knows most every tip and trick both common and unorthodox

And when it comes to lazy loading, bundling up and splitting code
There’s nothing quite like Webpack, which of course is built on top of Node
Considering my resume, I’m certain that you will concur
I am the very model of a modern web developer

[Chorus]
He is the very model of a modern web developer

When new frameworks and libraries emerge I must be ravenous
And gobble up the hot new thing, my appetite is bottomless
React and Vue and Angular, Immutable, RxJS
The list will be outdated long before I'm finished singing this

My pull requests rely on multitudinous utilities
To help me lint and test and build, a deluge of analyses
And every single day there are a hundred thousand more to learn
The web is going through an irresponsible amount of churn

[Chorus]
The web is going through an irresponsible amount of churn
The web is going through an irresponsible amount of churn
The web is going through an irresponsible amount of churn

This pace is agonizing! Code from yesterday is obsolete!
The speed of innovation is enough to knock me off my feet!
It's happening too fast! I can’t keep up! I’m tired! It’s all a blur!
I am the very model of a modern web developer!

[Chorus]
He is the very model of a modern web developer!

When i'm in the coding zone i listen the same song on loop, is that weird?

- Do you know how to work in a team?
- Of course, in my last job it was my idea to form a union

You know what i really like about right now? That is not like in 2016 when a new Javascript framework was release every day that does the same as jQuery but different, now days i can use it and everybody says "nice" instead of "you should do this with X.js with 4000 libraries on ES^N edition" to quote an articule i read on the time "I need to display data on a page, not perform Sub Zero’s original MK fatality."

!rant
With all this time at home due to quarentine, I was finally able to make my own mobile game, if you have an Android device it will be very apreshiated if you download it, iOS version will come when i found out how it is done

https://play.google.com/store/apps/...

In lua, arrays starts at 1
What is this madness??

Standing desks
Cool for like an hour but you have to sit

In a hospital bed and in my cellphone, web app went down, sended a bug fix while mildly conscious, typhoid fever btw

Source: https://skillprogramming.com/top-ra...

Not 10 minutes in Christmas party and I'm checking the printer, is a new record

A bug in production, so I was debugging and the boss says to me "how do you stay so calm?" and I answer "just like a surgeon does't have to freak out with blood, a developer doesn't have to freak out with bugs"

So we need a plumber, but first, show me some plumbing that you had do just for fun

-if every job would be like a developer

Damn allergies don't let me breathe, but code is more important than air

The website I've been developing is a bookmark in a client's web browser

I feel so successful

Reading the code that i wrote years ago, FUCK OLD ME

That moment that you are out for socialize and the only thing that you can think is that bug

I like to use programmer logic in everyday conversations, especially with not programmers, like

They: would you like coffee or cake?
Me: yes

The real question is "would you like coffee xor cake?"

!rant

Boss: You can't start coding without understanding the phrase P. O. O. P.
Me: P. O. O. P.?
Boss: Is a carefully organized code

People
Order
Our
Programs

- Knock, knock

- An async function

- Who's there?

Commit on master

Fuck timezones and daylight saving time

This emoji pack is really expensive... Or really cheap?

My doctor told me to remove coffee from my diet for a week

This will be a looong week

Deadlines