I really fucking loathe StackExchange. Some poor soul had the nerve (THE NERVE!) to ask a question about something they didn't understand (HOW DARE THEY!):

"What is the difference between a ping and a get request? The goal is to see if the site is up."

And par for the course over at smarmy-fucking-smug-pedant-land, in less than three hours, the question was closed: "[C]losed as not a real question... It's difficult to tell what is being asked here. This question is ambiguous, vague, incomplete, overly broad, or rhetorical and cannot be reasonably answered in its current form.

Allow me to indulge in some pedantic, "well actually" fuckery of my own...

Well actually, that actually is a 'real' question, because it's, you know, a fucking question. There's a question mark in there and everything! The person is asking what the difference is between two different things, and we can tell it's actually two different things because the person uses two different fucking nouns. And not only is this person asking to know what the difference is between these two different things, they even give us a use-case for why they're asking the question: they're pretty sure that they think they might know there's at least two different ways to check that their website is up, they just want to know what the difference is between those two methods -- hence the two different fucking nouns. It's almost like they're trying to give us some contextual information about why they're asking so that even if there is some vagueness to their question -- which is bound to happen IF YOU KNOW YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE SUBJECT, WHICH IS PROBABLY WHY YOU'RE FUCKING ASKING -- then a reasonable, decent, helpful person who is making a good-faith effort to be helpful can infer from that context enough information that clarifies the question enough to remove any vagueness or ambiguity and thus provide a helpful answer. AND THAT'S WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!

And what just fucking galls me to no end... the question was answered (SUCCINTLY, INFORMATIVELY, SIMPLY, AND CORRECTLY!) and even marked as accepted in less than fifteen minutes after being asked.

And that didn't stop some smug fuck from being an asshole and closing the question because "fucking scrub noobfags need to git gud."

https://serverfault.com/questions/...

If MySpace was a place for friends,
then StackExchange is the place for insufferably elitist smug cunts.

LinkedIn: Exploiting social psychology for fun and profit.

I was reading an excellent post by Kage about linkedin (you can find it and more here - https://devrant.com/users/Kage) a little while ago and it occurred to me the unique historic moment we are in. Never before have we been so connected in history. Never before have we had so great an opportunity to communicate with strangers (perhaps except for sketchy candy vans on college campuses, and tie dye wearing guys distributing slips of paper at concerts). And yet today, we are more atomized than ever before. In this unprecedented era of free information, and free communication, how can we make the most of our opportunities?

The great thing about linkedin is all the fawning morons who self select for it. They're on it. They're active, so you know they're either desperate attention hungry cock goblins,
self aggrandizing dicknosed cretins, desperate yeasty little strumpets, or a managerie of other forgetable fucking pawns,
willingly posting up their entire lives to be harvested and sold so someone can make 15 cents on a 2% higher ad conversion ratio for fucking cilas or beetus meds.

So what is a psychopathic autist asshole to do?

Ruthlessly exploit them by feeding them upvotes, hows-it-going-guys, and other little jolts of virtualized feel-good-chemical bullshit.

Remember the quickest way to network is for people to like you. And the quickest way to make people like you is either agree with them on everything, or be absolutely upfront with everything you disagree on.

Well, they'll love you, or hate you. But at least you'll be living rent free in their head. And that means they'll remember you when you call looking to network or get a referal.

Of course, in principle, this extends to any social media site. Why not facebook? Why not fucking *myspace*? Why not write a script in selenium to browse twitter all day, liking pictures of lattes and dogs posted by the lonely and social-approval-hungry devs working at places like google, twitter, faceborg, etc?

You could even extend this to non-job prospects. Want a quick fuck? Why, just script a swipe-right hack on tinder, or attach a big motherfucking robot arm to your phone, tapping and swiping for hours. Want to make a buck? Want not harvest data on ebay or amazon all god damn day and then run arbitration for 'wanted' classifieds on craiglist?

Why not automate all the things?

The world is at your fingertips, and you the power to automate it, while all the wall lickers and finger painters live oblivious to the opportunity they are surrounded with and blessed with daily.

Surely now that you know, it is your obligation, nay, your DUTY to show the way.
Now you are learned. Now you are prepared. Go forth and stroke the egos of disposable morons to bilk for future social favors while automating the world in ways never intended.