This is probably my last post for a while! I’m leaving for my honeymoon and we are going on a cruise and I ain’t gettin the WiFi! Hell naw!! Not taking any laptop, not answering phone!! Feels sooooo gooooood!! Especially after this shit week. I’ll be away from it all for 9 days!!!!!!!

We are going a day early so I might lurk a bit here and there but not much. 86 everything and everyone’s bs! Just me and my beautiful wife!

+ “I’m drunk, but I can still drive.”
+ “I’m tired, but I can still finish this piece of code.”
+ " I don’t need a silly seatbelt.”
+ “Tests? Naw, I’ll just push this to the Master branch.”

Codes for 2 weeks
Naw this is a bad idea. Let's revert
While reverting gets distracted by another idea
The other idea also sucks. Let's revert and also finish reverting the first idea pls 😒

Overheard between two POs at a white board:

PO1: Should we get the developers to size before we give an estimate to the customer?
PO2: Naw I think I can just guess.

ME IRL:

-submits pull request-

-goes to close some windows .... er ... naw-

-creates new virtual desktop to work in and leaves the old desktop / code open in case there are some bugs that pop up in production...-

A little story which happened my SECOND day on the floor after getting hired to do customer-facing phone support for my current job (can't mention the name, NDA). Customer from Detroit calls in:
Me: "Thank you for calling (company), my name is Guru, how can I assist you?"
C: "Uhhh, yeah. I need to get back into my ID. I can't backup my tablet or phone, and y'all are kinda holding my data host-" <Loud gunshots>
C: "oh! Shit!" <sound of running feet>
Me: "Everything OK sir?"
C: "Fuck! Naw! Hang on!" <more running, jumps a fence, skids to a stop>
C: "Ok, I'm safe, I'm safe... So what I gotta do to get y'all to let me back into my shit?"
*MUTE* Me: "First of all, what the fuck are you doing on the phone with me when you should be either A) calling the cops because, I dunno, just maybe some trouser stain is attempting to kill you, or, B) FIRING BACK, MOTHERFUCKER!!"
*REAL* Me: "OK, first you gotta… (outlines step 1,2,3... etc)
C: "OK, that sounds easy enough. I'll try it when I get to the office, I'm on my way there now- shit. Hold on again..."
(talking to someone on the street): "what, him? That dude? Over there? That dude... In the shirt?What the fuck!? Are you sure? Hold on, sir! I'ma call you back..."
Last thing I hear before the line lets go is a large BOOM!

Sometimes it's best to just sit back and sip your coffee...

Ok It's my last term in CS and guess what I have the knowledge as same as some one in high school i rly don't know what to do nAw any suggestions

You know when you have one of those days where you're really tired and just don't really want much bullshit, and because of that you get an unexpected token space? Well I do