Wrote my friend Sam a letter when I was still working in support. I think it still holds up today.

---

Dear Sam,

I understand that you will join us in our overseas office. Congratulations on landing that job. It’s good steady work. I’ve been doing it for the last ten years.

Your still young so maybe I can give you some little wisdom that will help you in your working years to come.

Let me begin by shedding some light on phone calls.

I try. I really do try Sam. But it is getting so hard for me to hold back the rage that builds up during certain phone calls. Especially the ‘Sorry, I just don’t know anything about computers! -giggle-’ ones.

Those are the times that I have no access to what they see. I’ve no team-viewer, can not take over that screen in any other way. And why-oh-why can I not take over that terminal session dear Sam? It’s because the caller can not double-click an icon or find a terminal session number.

And what is the reason for this? Because they ‘just don’t know anything about computers! -giggle-’. This is a sort of get-out-of-jail-free card. Beware of these callers Sam.

There is nothing so nerve-wrecking then finding yourself at the mercy of people describing Internet Explorer (do not even get me started) as ‘the big ‘E’, if they use Chrome for their webmail then they most likely will say ‘Mail’ if they mean Chrome. There is no logic Sam. That is just the way these people work.

They will suck all enjoyment out of your work. They will make you want to hunt them down in dark office hallways and show them your tears Sam. Because cry you will.

Sure, I understand that not everyone can be tech savvy. Why, if everyone would be, where would that leave us? No. I love the technologically challenged. They put the fiber in my internet. They make me LOL for real. After the initial anger subsides anyway.

But just below that well-willing folk, on the other side of that border… there they dwell: Management.

Nice cars, suits and iphones Sam. First thing a new manager will require is a brand spanking new business-card. It will hold his/her new title. Then an iphone or overpriced android model will follow suit.

Then they will barge into your office, holding it like it’s the next best thing since sliced bread.

Any manager will automatically assume that you will drop anything you are doing at the present moment to acknowledge the presence of greatness. Failing to do so will result in awkward yet fulfilling situations. I recommend that you do not take your hands of the keyboard and give only the slightest of nods after 5 minutes of complete silence and glaring.

Well… you feel the glare. You do not glare yourself. You do not break eye-contact with the monitor. It does not even matter if you are typing for real or not. I once clicked away happily for 5 minutes. I just typed ‘he is still there’ over and over again. Do not break down Sam. This moment will decide your relationship with this individual.

After the nod there will be a flood of words aimed in your general direction. You can disregard anything that is said. It boils down to ‘can not operate device’.

You then take the device from this person and put it next to you on your desk. You’ll ask the name of this simpleton, write it down on a sticky-note, slap that on the phone. Then you’ll write a random date in the not so near future on another sticky and hand that to the bewildered person in front of you.

It will usually utter some incoherent words about ‘needing, time or but’ (I find that ‘but’is a word they like. They tend to use it three or four times consecutive before you usher them through the door).

Now you’ve won Sam. Well… not really. But it will feel good, I can guarantee that.

This must do for now. A new suit is glaring at me for the last five minutes.

Felt good to do something productive with this time.

Take care,

Baltasar

P.s. I just noticed that there is some foam around his mouth. So if you encounter this, don’t worry: it seems to be perfectly normal.

Word Porn

HOLY FUCK! Why is JS world so fucking confusing? I haven't even started learning it and its already giving me a headache. I feel like there are a billion different things i have to learn that aren't just "vanilla js". All i want to do is learn some web dev, take on freelance work, become a digital nomad. Im a simple C++ and ios/android developer things are so straight forward. JS seems like a clusterfuck of just stuff 😧 Id like to say this isnt a my language is > than yours rant. This is a "like what the fuck" rant. My brain was like Html, Css, JS cool thats all i have to learn... boy was i wrong. Can someone give me a word of wisdom as i go down this apparent rabbit hole?

I just missed our daily scrum because of Teams. Now, Microsoft in their infinite "wisdom" have decided to integrate Outlook calendar invites into Teams so any invitation shows up as a notification, looking like a red warning light as if something is seriously wrong. Then, when you click that notification you're lead astray, moving away from what you came there for. In my case, I'm only using Teams for online meetings, usually our daily scrum which is always located in the same chat room or whatever it's called. But once lost in the catacombs of Teams, it's just impossible to find my way back in this garbage heap of a UX. So instead, I tried to use the link in the recurrent calendar event for our daily scrums. This always used to work, but now it says "On hold". Teams is such a piece of junk, just like most M$ products nowadays. I've complained about Teams, Word and Outlook to my superiors, and suggested we'd replace them with better tools, but to no avail. They go like "We've paid a lot for these Microsoft licenses so we just have to continue using them". So, the logic is like...If we're paying for crap we're stuck with the crap. 🤔

CERTIFIED RECOVERY SERVICES: CRYPTO RECOVERY EXPERTS YOU CAN TRUST

Certified recovery services is totally incredible! I mean, for real, I never thought that I'd need a miracle to recover from a "simple" software update, but here we are. I was drinking coffee, clicking that update button like a good grown-up, and then out of nowhere—boom—my Bitcoin wallet that held $250,000 was more locked up than my grandad's liquor cabinet on holidays with the family.
Now, my grandfather used to always tell me, "If you're gonna lose your mind, at least do it with a beer in your hand," but you know what—there ain't enough beer in this world when you realize that your recovery word is misspelled. I rechecked that piece of paper a million times hoping that magically the letters would reorder themselves. Spoiler alert—they did not.
Cue the panic. I paced my living room back and forth, talking to my dog as if he knew the solution. Grandad's words came ringing in my head again: "If you mess up, don't cry—fix it. Or at least cry while you're fixing it." So, with the Google at my command and a tear in my eye, I found Certified Recovery Services.
I'll admit, I was skeptical. It was too good to be true, like the TV adverts grandad loved to watch where the mop also made coffee. But necessity created boldness. Right from the first phone call, their customer service was professional but also understanding—like they could tell I was two steps from hugging my laptop and apologizing to it.
They told me the whole thing to me in calming tones and reassured me that all was not lost (though my sanity threatened to be lost). Their updates were so regular, I came to look forward to their emails even more than my pizza delivery man brings mine. Within days—bingo, presto, like magic—my wallet was returned. All $250,000, sitting there as if it never even departed. I nearly kissed one on my screen.
Grandad had a saying: "Life's gonna hit you in the face. Duck, or hire someone wiser than you." And that wiser person, it turns out, was Certified Recovery Services. They saved my money and my blood pressure, at least. So if your web world falls in, don't panic—down a pint, remember grandad's words of wisdom, and ring Certified Recovery Services. They'll sort you out.

Here's Their Info Below:
WhatsApp: (+1(740)258‑1417 )

DID YOU LOSE YOUR CRYPTO ASSET ? |WE HELP RECOVER WHATS YOURS-FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER

The internet once felt like a sanctuary a boundless realm where knowledge could be shared and connections forged from the comfort of home. Yet, over time, it has morphed into a treacherous landscape, rife with scammers preying on unsuspecting victims. As an ardent R&B fan, I idolized Teddy Swims, whose soulful lyrics and timeless wisdom shaped my life and career. So, when an Instagram notification popped up with a message reading, "Guess who?" purportedly from Swims himself I was elated. Blinded by admiration, I engaged eagerly, oblivious to the red flags. The imposter, posing as Swims, mentioned a lucrative investment opportunity that promised quick returns. My judgment clouded by unwavering trust, I bypassed due diligence, convinced that my idol would never deceive me. In a reckless moment, I invested a staggering $600,000, only to discover later that I had been ruthlessly scammed. The account vanished, my funds disappeared, and the harsh truth set in: I had fallen victim to an elaborate catfishing scheme. Devastated but determined, I scoured the internet for solutions and stumbled upon FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER, a team specializing in cryptocurrency fraud recovery. Skeptical yet desperate, I contacted their representative, who listened empathetically to my ordeal. Their confidence instilled hope as they assured me they could trace and reclaim my stolen assets. True to their word, FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER executed a meticulous investigation, leveraging their expertise to track the fraudulent transaction. They maintained transparent communication, updating me on each breakthrough. To my astonishment, they successfully recovered the entirety of my investment, exposing the scammer’s deceit. This harrowing situation taught me a pivotal lesson: the internet, while invaluable, demands vigilance. Emotional attachments can cloud rationality, making us easy targets. I share my story as a cautionary tale, urging others to verify identities, scrutinize offers, and consult experts before committing funds. My deepest gratitude goes to FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER for their unwavering dedication. Thanks to them, I reclaimed not just my money, but my peace of mind. Let my misfortune serve as a reminder trust, but always verify. The digital world can be a double-edged sword; while it offers incredible opportunities, it also harbors dangers that can ensnare even the most cautious among us ,and if fallen victim to cryptocurrency scam seek help from FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER.
For help
W H A T S A P P: +1 8 0 2 9 5 2 3 4 7 0

EmaIL F U N D S R E T R I E V E R [@] E N G I N E E R. C O M

OR

S U P P O R T @ F U N D S R E T R I E V E R [@] E N G I N E E R. C O M