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It's pouring cats and dogs in Mumbai since a week. For the uninitiated, these are regular monsoon rains for the costal city.
And some motherfucker stole my umbrella from the office.
Thankfully when I left, rains had halted and I was able to commute home without getting wet.
Tomorrow when the fucker gets it back, I am gonna make them stand in rain for an hour.7
I work for a media tech company and it's super fun. People around great taste in music and movies.
Meeting rooms are named are bands or movies. One is named as Shire, other as Asgard, and another one is Thanos, and many more.
And here's a special one :D
P.S.: will respond to all the previous posts, comments, and mentions soon.5
A friend broke his leg and installed windows to distract himself from the injury pain.
Pain of using windows is more than the pain of a broken leg.4
A LPT I read on Reddit which I really found effective, sharing with the community here:
Using following naming convention really helps to keep file system sorted
YYYY - MM - DD - Name
2022-12-31-Christmas trip to Amsterdam
2022-02-28-Honeymoon to Maldives
Your folders, will always be sorted in order making it easier for you to locate them.11
I need more band tshirts.
It's a shame that I don't already have enough.
Share your favourite tshirts/piece of clothing.
Bonus if they are of a rock/metal band's tshirt.9
I used to hate marketing.
But now, I realised how powerful of a tool it is.
Indians are dumb and wide majority are fucking illiterate out of choice.
Dumb morons. Add as much glamour as possible, and you will be able to sell these fuckers anything.
99% of the elders in my family are illiterate. Many of my cousins post fake success photos and market themselves in family group.
All the boomers think that the kids are doing well. No critical thinking. In reality, those cousins are struggling like crazy.
The boomers, including my retarded father, think that I am a useless piece of shit. According to them, I am a waste of oxygen.
Trust me, market well and you can make billions in Indian market.
*CTO in panic, as always, invites everyone to the war room*
CTO: We have a MAJOR problem where 0.0001% of our customers are not receiving SMS confirmations.
Me: Cool. But, 0.0001% is very less compared to the other problems we are solving.
CTO: You don't understand, this is critical issue that needs to be addressed immediately.
Me: But even those.0.0001% customers are receiving e-mail confirmations, so this is not even blocker as we have other channels working.
CTO: I am emotional at this point. You need to prioritise this now.
Me: Okay, do we know the root cause of this problem?
Engineering head: we have blacklisted those numbers in past as our system detected them abusing our platform.
Me: Cool. Let's whitelist them, nothing much to worry here.
CTO: Floyd, you need to understand that 0.0001% of the customers are not receiving the SMS and the solution you are proposing is incorrect.
Me: Okay, what do you suggest?
CTO: We stop sending the SMS to all the customers.
Everyone on the call: 😨18
Apart from the fact that I arrived at a good framework at work to play in problem space than in solution space, this post is more about self realisation and a slight progress in my happiness levels.
Monsoons started in India. The vibe somehow had always been melancholic for me triggering SAD (aka seasonal depression).
However, this year I find it cosier than ever. Hot showers, lazing around on a holiday when it's pouring outside, watching my favourite show/movie. I feel very relaxed in the moment, even when work and life is not as expected/under control.
What I realised is that my problem can be solved. I need a bigger house. That would give me privacy, some personal space for hobbies, and put a barrier between me and parents easing the tension and clashes. I could then get married, and with all the money I will save (from not buying a house myself), can be used to pursue hobbies like music, art, travel, etc.
Whenever I relax, my sleep pattern changes where I have longer duration of deep sleep with many dreams (perhaps processing everything). Does anyone else experience such a phenomenon?
Anyway, life doesn't get easy or hard, we just learn to put up with shit.4
So fed up of existing.
I am not saying that I am suicidal, but if a truck was accelerating towards me, I would not bother to move.
Even though I consider myself decently successful in life in terms of career, friendship, and to some extent, family. I strongly feel that I am in a very wrong environment.
I have zero trust, safety, love, and nurturing care from my parents and others around me.
I lack physical privacy, psychological safety, and emotional void.
My hypothesis is that if I was in a better environment with slightly lesser responsibilities and needs better met, I could have achieved wonders. With that, who wouldn't?
Why do we exist? Just to suffer?29
I have another level of respect for people who walk fast and/or don't block others.
Especially in an over populated country like mine, at any given spot, you can have more than one thousand people.
It annoys me how people walk slowly in the middle of the lane. Just cannot do anything about it.9
CTO: Research, problem analysis, customer need validations, and data based prioritisation is stupid.
Me: So, then why should we solve this problem?
CTO: Because my team invests a lot of time in here (read "because we build a shitty system in past without thinking and we are doing it again").
Me: I don't see this as a good idea.
CTO: I become emotional when I request product to align and they don't. We must solve this problem and not what customers want.
Me: I am not participating here.
CTO: And I want you to work on weekends to support my team.
People are incredibly rude and ill mannered.
New company stories.
Whenever I am in office and having a conversation with a person, someone randomly appears (like those annoying pop-ups on websites) and interrupts the conversation and starts with their own.
I don't understand why people don't wait for the conversation to be over, or ask for permission (in case it is urgent).
Such behaviour derails the entire thought process and breaks the rhythm.
It's just beyond me. How difficult it can be!!!18
Every passing day in this country drives me crazier.
Someday, maybe soon, I'll go insane.
I feel claustrophobic and suffocated. My interests are changing even if I don't desire to. Feels like a forced changed, as the new ones don't necessarily make me happy, and rather remould me to fit into a toxic environment/society.
While I was raised in this environment, most of my opinions formed via internet which had a heavy influence from the west. When I got to my sense, almost at the age of 24, was the time when I started forming opinions. Internet was my only pal. Family/friends never bothered about me. And now when I dream of and work hard towards moving out, the same family/friends guilt me into not doing so. Maybe they care now, maybe they are jealous, maybe something else.
Even if I settle down here, convincing myself that I desire such a life and counting the benefits of doing so, it won't make me happy.
The heart wants, what the heart wants.4
Update about my boss:
I was early too judge. Maybe still early to form an opinion.
But dude seems pretty level headed. Yes, he is agressive. Yes, he has weird way of complicating things.
But I got to learn things from him. I earned his trust, just like I did in the past with other managers. He is confident about my performance now. He gave me space to ramp up and pushed me to limits.
But now, Floyd is settled. Maybe with time, I might get occasional unpleasant interactions, but those are part of every job.
However, we as a society decided to be in agile mode. Fix a problem and the solution gives rise to another one.
The business head of my pod is going crazy over the deliverables.
They were surviving for years with a product manager. Everything was driven by tech without any research.
And now when I am in, they want everything to be done yesterday.
We spent some decent amount of time on strategy and it turned out to be good. Now they are questioning that why ain't I delivering?!
It's been a week we finalised the strategy, let me get some space and time to structure and plan the execution.
Business heads are pretty nice and level headed people. Just that I don't understand the sense of urgency. I get it that my pod often has to deal with fire fighting given the nature of the business, but holy fuck! Stop pressurising to deliver everything together on a war foot.
They are like, we'll ask for more resources. But whose gonna tell them that 9 women cannot deliver a baby in 1 month.
I need time for discovery and research. Without that, don't expect impact.
As the only PM space, leading the entire vertical, how can I even focus on multiple initiatives?
I really miss my previous life of my first company. It's exactly an year when I left them and I changed two companies since then.
My learning and earnings sky rocketed, but WLB took a toll.
I miss the time when I could finish my work in an hour and did whatever the fuck I want while at work like browsing new topics to learn, exploring places, attending events, connecting with people, making social posts to learn, finance as a hobby, yada yada..
These days, I feel too burned out. Not that I am worried about job stability, because I trust my skills.
But more due to the fact that I have to constantly focus on work for the time I am in office. No free space or time to collect myself together, process things, and focus.
This leads me to thinking about work (read processing office discussions), at home too.
I cannot enjoy music. Feels like a load.
I no longer attend events or meet people after work. No more wasting time on the internet.
And most importantly, I am not bored anymore. I miss being bored. I miss living a boring, mediocre lifestyle.
I miss doing my side projects and polishing my portfolio site ten times a day, because I got nothing better to do.
I used to spend time learning right grammar and why American and English words are different and which to use where.
I miss spending time of Google Maps exploring borders and remote regions.
Weekends fly by. No hobby to pursue. No free time.
I miss the days when I had nothing to do and I was bored and I could do anything.
I used to be always happy. Because no responsibilities. I used to be always up for a meetup. I used to be available for a phone call.
Now it's nothing but work which is surely exciting and some foundational learning with good enough money, but I miss my time when I used to get bored because I had nothing to do.5
I work out of HQ office of my org and perhaps the only one from my team.
My boss will be working out of this office as well.
He is currently visiting, before he relocates full time.
I have my first in-person meeting with him. I am super anxious and want to avoid it at all cost.5
Fuck Reddit admins. Fuck them in ass with a rusted iron rod. Then pour in some liquid steel and dehydrate them to death.
Remember the toxic girl who stalked and harassed me? She did that on Reddit.
After multiple reports to faggot admins, no action was taken against her multiple accounts.
I ended up creating few alt accounts for my mental well-being.
I have been contributing fairly well from all my accounts earning community trust and reputation, even behind the mask of anonymity.
Now, day before yesterday, a teen started abusing me for no reason on a local sub. I ended up ignoring.
Next morning I am notified that admins banned my account permanently.
What the fuck! I did not violate any policy and yet I was kicked out.
I raised an appeal for those fags to look into this and uplift the ban.
Fuckers banned all my accounts permanently without giving any reason.
Instead of taking action against retards who harass people, these bhenchods ban people who contribute in a good way.
I truly wish, that the person who made this decision rots to death while feeling the pain of regret.
I am soooo fucking annoyed. I have been using Reddit for many good reasons and have found it really helpful in various areas of my life.12
More ranting about my boss and his orgasmic love for documentation.
He overcomplicates everything.
Let's say if we have to go from A to C.
A normal human will go from A to B and B to C.
My boss would go from A to K, K to P, P to E, E to Z, and finally Z to C.
Over complication is his first love. Every stakeholder hates him for that. He is known, org wide, to introduce complex frameworks in processes.
I have no idea what pleasure does he gets by doing this.
All I know by now is that it is rightly said, 'to make things simple, requires a touch of a genius.'5
My boss has zero emotions and empathy. How ironic for someone into product management!
He is 100% logical, maybe more. He is smart that way and yes, that is a skill to learn from him. He has good product management hard skills.
But, he is an emotional void. Zero humane feelings. He treats everyone like a machine. He is overly obsessed with documentation and wants every single word to be his way.
My writing and communication skills are his pet peeve.
Last Monday, our CTO was in office and he wanted to meet me. I was working remotely, so leads notified me. Even though our CTO runs a monkey business, I was eager and excited to meet him.
This week, my boss will be in office. He texted me to catch-up on coming Monday. I am anxious and worried even though my boss has great skills in our work function.
Furthermore, I find my boss overly critical about everything I do. Maybe it's not me and he does it with everyone, because I haven't been part of a group connect, so no idea. But dude.. give me a break.. give me some room to breathe..
What I heard from another junior, who joined us last month, is that one of the folks who resigned in past was because of my boss.
Feel like that I will move on from my dream organisation as soon as I complete little more than one year.
And apart from that, I scratched my eye glasses, Reddit permanently banned my account for no fault of mine, wanted to catch-up with a cousin, who is going through a rough phase, to cheer up the lad, but he won't answer our calls.
What a shitty weekend.
And yes, my boss is a hipster in the way he dresses and thinks.
He literally keeps saying that we need to use dark patterns like click baits, incite FoMo in our app users, add feedback loops, etc.3
I am proud of my internet infrastructure/setup.
While it's not the best and has some room for upgrades, it's still pretty powerful and well managed.
And my house looks like an abandoned warehouse as compared to my internet setup.2
Tech management and leadership are the most toxic and cancerous folks of any organisation.
In all my past experience, I have encountered nut jobs.
If it were just me, then entire product or design org won't be suffering. What helps me confirm this hypothesis is every engineer who work for such retards is suffering and fighting for their existence.
We have monkey business going on with our CTO and his ass licking engineering head.
The culture in engineering org is to address each other as 'brother' and seniors as 'sir'.
Bhai is the local term for brother.
This is how an average Slack message reads:
"We will make the changes.
CC: @John Doe bhai, @Marcus Fila bhai, @David Elliot sir"
And even though these people are part of the conversation, everyone tags everyone else in each response.
Slack culture is a mess.4
Everything is a fucking priority.
According to the management, everything should be done yesterday already.
Gave me a single designer and developer while asking asking me to deliver long term and short term initiatives at the same time.
We use Slack at work for IMs.
There are tons of threads created in each DM, group chat, and channels.
There is a purpose to each thread.
But.. BUT.... Engineering team responds to a thread and also sends the same message in channel.
What's the fucking point of the thread...
FUCKING STOP SPAMMING WITH DUPLICATE MESSAGES.
I have a cup of green tea in my hand right now and I feel like pouring it on myself.
Third tier geniuses from Timbuktu.6
So part of my job is to watch movies.
Unreleased movies. Premier special movies. Restricted access movies. Special screening movies.
Fun part about being in a media tech company is you get amazing perks.
One of the product verticals we have, competes with Netflix and Amazon Prime Video.
So, we have to determine which movies to license and resell on our platform.
For which we have volunteer program where they assign us movies to watch. A couple of movies everyday. Folks have to submit their feedback on certain parameters and then the team evaluates and makes the decision.
As of last few weeks, Cannes 2022 was on and we had a lot of movies lined up. Got to watch some real good ones while some were mediocre.
Surely fun, don't get paid for it. Good perks. Loving it so far.10
I find smart watches so rude.
You are talking to someone and the bloody watch goes dinggg..
So the person you are talking to, stops listening, checks their smart watch, and performs whatever action they want before getting back to the conversation.
I fucking hate it. Not only you are rude to me, but also broke the chain of thought and rhythm of the conversation.
Fuck you and fuck your smart watch.
The other day I saw the office boy and the janitor wearing a smart watch. Mind you, the salaries of these folks is not more than $250 a month. Yet they have a top quality smart phone and a smart watch, where the combo usually costs more than their monthly salary.
It's important to consume and show off, than to make the bloody ends meet.
A monkey world.26
Companies who geo block their sites for no fucking reason can go fuck themselves.
So a bunch of retarded pharmacies in India, geo block hits from anywhere outside of India.
A thousands of Indians are living abroad with their parents and family living in India.
Imagine, I have to order medicines for my parents since they are not very tech savvy and I cannot do that because some rotten brained guava thought that it's a good idea to geo block access.
What is the fucking point in doing so? There are many such companies, especially Indian who do so. I have keep toggling my VPN because of this.30
I left my previous company because my tech leadership was insensitive and agressive.
However, I am in a start-up right now and CTO is a nut job.
He creates random Slack threads and keeps messaging me like crazy. The co-founders have shut him down multiple times and yet his only success metric is "number of deliveries".
The other day something broke in production and teams were discussing about resolving the bug in one of the Slack channels.
CTO literally wrote this and I wish I was making this up, "let us not look at the logs and trust our code to work fine."
I was baffled and confused. I realised me leaving my previous organisation because of such tech leadership was a stupid decision.
Crows are black everywhere.5