what if for some magical way you can switch places with the client... on the things I will do to him...

me, learning java right now...

A client wants to make a Pokemon GO type of game.. In two months.. (before the hype ended, they said)

whenever I see someone named Jason it makes me giggle

When your editor terminate and you want to undo 😄

So you launched a new app/website. And you can't enjoj it because you expect it to break after each tap/click like it did during debugging. 😤

new job starts today!

Thx for everything devRant :) most of all to @dfox for making this possible greetings from Poland!

The seemingly obligatory "Look what I did with my stickers!" post.

The best way to write maintainable code is to imagine the next person who has to debug your code. Then imagine that they have your phone number, personal address, and your daily schedule.

“An omelette, promised in two minutes, when not ready in two minutes, the customer has two choices – wait or eat it half-cooked. Software customers also have the same choices.”

Micromanagement 😐😐😐

Developers who think using cryptic variable names (like acronyms) is better than long descriptive variable names.....but then feel the need to document/comment the variable name rather than just naming the variable properly in be first place.

// Current CGRect to draw into
let ccgrd = self.currentCGRect()

Instead of just

let currentRectForDrawing = self.currentCGRect()

error handling

yeah I actually forgot to thank stackover flow from what I am now. Thank you Stackoverflow

credits on the owner of the photo.

Sometimes it gets physical.

That moment when you've tried everything and nothing works and the only logical thing left to do is post a question on stackoverflow;
&wait;
&obviously rant on devRant while you wait;

the best way

When asked for an estimate, "I'll take N days."

N-1 days later, when asked for a status update, "We encountered a few issues. It'll take N more days."

I really hate it when online sources aimed at educating people looking to get into programming attack specific languages. I'm ok with them recommending some good starting languages (ex. JavaScript, Python, etc.) but I find it extremely inappropriate and damaging when they list languages they consider "bad." Languages like JavaScript, PHP and Java constantly get called out even though they power a huge chunk of the web and services hundreds of millions of people use every day. IMO it's a huge disservice to tell beginners not to even look at these languages. We should be teaching the language isn't really what's important - it's what you build with it.

I'll mail a brand new devRant squishy ball to the first 5 people who make a devRant-related tweet (including @devrantapp) in it and link to it in a comment on this rant. Go!

Does anyone else think it's really cool that the founder uses this app regularly? Talking about you @dfox

Anyone else put in headphones with absolutely no intention of listening to anything, just to make people less likely to bother you?

Who all graduating this week? 🙌🏼 Developers ready to enter real world?

Making good progress on the devRant slackbot, here is a sneak peek...

When you start on a new coding language...

Client: hey here are the original final 15 megapixel pictures for the website (to replace placeholders that have been replaced by other placeholders), please implement them.

Me: okay, let me just compress them a bit. *save for web and devices, upload*

Client: they are a bit pixely could you make them larger?

Me: errrr. well that will kill loadtime

*repeat this process 8 times over F-ing chat until pic is F-ing huge*

Client: okay now that the picture is nice and crisp and huge please add some blur in photoshop

Developers coding cycle:

Start of Project - "Right, I am going to make this code clean and structured."

Deadline looming - "F**k it, just throw the code in there and get it finished".

The first computer programmer was a female, named Ada Lovelace.

"My co-founders are all nontechnical so they do not understand when I rant about code"

"There's an app for that!"