findDev - Tinder for finding your developer partners. [more details]

Best way to remove and hide pimple 😂

ctto

Your choice.

I know its not much, but im just happy i even get users 😂

I’ve done it again 😂

"Our last lead-developer was a real smart guy, he modernized the legacy code and we all learned a lot from him"

I need a beer, and a shotgun.

Client: I want all cookies blocked on my computer.

Me: Are you sure? Some things won't work if i do that. Like using online banking.

Client: I don't use it, so it's fine.

*Two weeks pass. I have to come back and see three bankcards laying on the table*

Client: I'm not able to use online banking anymore. Can you fix it?

Come on! You pay me to give advice and help out with problems. The least you could do is listen.

Didn't got the job after a month and 4 rounds of interviews. They then asked me to fill out a survey about my experience. What do you think about my experience you fucks? It was amazing wastkng my time with you...

My LastPass master password..

Trues Up!

Got a new baby today

When it doesn't matter anymore if you read or not, because the author already have been paid!

logger.info(String.Format(" User {0} changed their password from {1} to {2}", username, oldPassword, newPassword))

Production system. Plaintext log.

1. Create user on website.
2. Receives mail with username and password.
3. Changes password.
4. Receives mail with new password.
5. Delete account and look for another service.

I've forgot root password to open this one...Seems no soda for me today

At a funeral.....

A visitor: What's the WiFi password here?

Priest: Respect the dead

Visitor: All small letters ?...

Everyone here ranting about a fucking missing semicolon. I can't remember the last time a missing semicolon was the issue...

You wanna know what's REALLY BALL-BUSTING????

WHEN THE FUCKING 10 y/o LEGACY CODEBASE, CODED BY FUCKING PHP WORDPRESS SCRIPTERS WHO THOUGHT THEY COULD BUILD AN ENTERPRISE SHIT CAUSE ZF2 "LOOKS EASY" AND THEN FILL IT UP WITH SPAGHETTI, IS SO BAD WRITTEN THAT IN ORDER FOR THE PAGE TO RENDER YOU ACTUALLY ****HAVE**** TO DISABLE ERROR REPORTING SO WHENEVER A FUCKING ERROR HAPPENS ON THE TEMPLATE RENDER COMPONENT OF ZEND FRAMESHIT 2, YOU'RE LEFT WITH A FUCKING BLANK PAGE AND NOTHING IS LOGGED TO THE LOG FILE, SO YOUR ONLY OPTION IS DIE() DEBUGGING LINE BY LINE ON THE 1300 LINES PHTML FUCKFEST OF A VIEW THEY HAVE.

MISSING SEMICOLON? YES PLEASE, GIVE ME MORE OF THAT SHIT

! Rant
YOU can walk on water and write code from requirements, provided both are frozen.

Creating a new account is always fun...

"This Is My Secure Password" <-- Sorry, no spaces allowed.

"ThisIsMySecurePassword" <-- Sorry, Passwords must include a number

"ThisIsMySecurePassword1" <-- Sorry, Passwords must include a special character

"ThisIsMySecurePassword 1" <-- Sorry, no spaces allowed

"ThisIsMySecurePassword%1" <-- Sorry, the % character is not allowed

"ThisIsMySecurePassword_1" <-- Sorry, passwords must be shorter than 16 characters

"Fuck" <-- Sorry, passwords must longer than 6 characters

"Fuck_it" <-- Sorry, passwords can't contain bad language

"Password_1" <-- Accepted.

Client: There is a high severity production issue.. you need to fix urgently..

Developer: I am on the way.. Will fix it once I reach home.

Client: I don't care where you are. Fix it right now😡😡

See the developer!!!

I know what I'm dressing up as this year.

Let's make a drinking game!

We will say random words. If there is a JavaScript framework with that name we have to take a shot.

20 minutes later we will need a liver transplant.

Every IT admin's wish