The best investment you can make right now is in yourself
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This is what I'm telling myself to justify buying another Udemy course

Over the course of a few months, I began to suspect my manager disliked me on a personal level. I decided to be proactive and invited him to a meeting on "Improving our working relationship" - he showed up 5 minutes late and fired me.

I don't argue with managers. I believe the music is the universal language of the world, so I just sing!

twinkle twinkle little star
*pulls out glock*
your bullshit has gone too far.

Last year I had to program most of my projects in Python. I like the language, don't get me wrong. But man oh man if you indent your line of code one too many fucking times, it can be such a pain in the ass to find your error...

Even if it may clutter your code (not in my opinion), that's why I love them curly brackets and languages which use them <3

/* Don't forget to re-deploy application after every time daylight savings time change, before Monday at noon. */

when you deploy useless hotfix/patch in prod.

Somebody make a big decision here 😂😂

Inspirational quote of the day

Fuck me man.

Last week when I needed to study for final exams, I wanted to learn all the codes.

Now that I'm free, all I feel like doing is sitting around and watching TV.

It's literally day #1 of my summer break omfg this is ridiculous

docker rmi $(docker images -q -a)

biggest upvoters of devrant

@-red
@devTea

and now comes another contender:
@Conrad

Anyone else? Just me then.

Wrote my final exams a few hours ago. I just hope I pass.

I need a hug.

Today I continued working on my File Encryption Frontend, nothing functional, yet!

The icons are selfmade, I think at least the folder icon is pretty.

Our programm will have something like a Zip-Explorer feeling too it, but our aim is still encrypting files to the unbreakable point.

The CEO asks God:
"God, how much time do you need to create the earth?"
God: "uh, 10 billion years I think"
CEO: " You have only 7 days. Well 6, the last one is to fix everything gone wrong after deploying"

And here we are

making a pasta sauce, look at them sweet ass bell peppers ooohhh

Network speed at office is so slow, i should work from house, but i can't.

Ok, bugs I love you.......

OG content

First day at new work... I already hate seeing this

Amazing!🚀😂

Caps Lock preventing login since 1980.

#frontend #backend

Game of testing

Life is hard.

You are born. DNA gets determined. You go through infancy.

Puberty comes and DNA is like
"uh from now you'll pretty much have strong sexual urges, a huge desire to be sexually prolific, nothing weird like being pedo or into rape though".

me: Uh ok.
dna: oh, also, you're gonna be one of those late bloomers, you know, you talk like shit, you dress like shit, you smell like shit.
life: that's true and also you don't have anyone in your life to teach you about that shit, so forget about kissing, having sex, let alone being in a relationship for a long time.

*a lot of years go by with a lot of missed opportunities, mistakes and regrets*

life: ok, you seem to have become a decent sex partner out of a lot of scarring experiences, but there's one problem: you've fallen in love with somebody.

and you're married

and you have kids

me: well, does that mean I can't fuck other people?
life: yeah, no. I'm surprised I even have to explain that, it's called cheating. It will pretty much ruin your marriage, and fuck up your kids.

me: ok, I guess no then. I'm still fortunate enough to have sex with my wife right?

life: yeah... but you still want to fuck other people
me: what???
life: yeah, did you think that falling in love would make you not want to fuck other people? fuck no

me: ok, well I'm very grateful that I get to experience sex at all.
life: yes... there's a thing though, your partner has a much much lower libido than you.

me: ok, well maybe if I exercise and dress better that might change
life: that will definitely help, you'll feel more confident and have more stamina, but every time you retry exercising, you remember how much you hate it and how little stamina you have.
oh, I'm sorry, I forgot you had kids and work, yeah no time or energy for that.

me: ok, then should I just embrace a more liberal lifestyle, like becoming a swinger?
life: ha, fat chance, it's a very taboo thing and you're not that liberal, neither is she.

me: uhhh, i guess i can sometimes watch porn then...
life: watching porn regularly will make the only sex that you have worse, according to statistics.

me: ok, I guess I should get ripped

I hate such glitches in adblockers these days

The samurai were more advanced than I thought...

(stolen from Reddit)

Thanks to the person who posted the Nintendo Switch deal at $179.99

I got one shipped.

Hello from Mauritius!

"Position: Java developer
Requirements: Knowledge in C, C++, C#, JavaScript, Python, frameworks like jQuery or Angular (preferable)"

Do you need a Java developer or some kind of development deity?